orchidaloha
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- Apr 18, 2013
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Hi, this is my first post here... I've been thinking about looking for a forum online but I keep putting it off (I'm not sure why), but I think it's time to start talking about what's going on.
Long story short - we are dealing with male factor infertility (sperm morphology, everything else is fine). I haven't had any tests done yet so as far as we know, that is our only issue. I actually got pregnant the first time we slept together but sadly, it ended in miscarriage at 6 weeks. I didn't know about his MFI at the time and only found out around 6 months later when he felt he could tell me, which is totally fine by me because I can understand how hard it must have been for him! I love him more than anything and even if we can't have children, I would rather be with him just the two of us than not be with him. Of course, we both really want a baby though, why else would I be here on this site?!
He was married for two years before meeting me and they were trying to get pregnant the whole time and they also had four IUI's and one IVF and nothing worked. She became obsessed with it, blamed him and it ended up being one of the reasons why their marriage fell apart. We have not been using birth control for the past two years and have not gotten pregnant. We haven't been aggressively trying but there have been a few months where we have managed to get the timing just right.
He doesn't like talking about the situation and gets uncomfortable whenever something comes up about it but I need him to talk to me about this. I understand how it would be difficult for him and it's no party for me either hearing about what he went through with his ex wife, but I would like to talk about it. I would just like to know exactly what we are dealing with, how severe the issue is and what he is open to in the future in order for us to have a baby.
Anyway... I have some questions from anyone who has experienced this.
- Does anyone have any suggestions to help him open up to me about the whole situation? I love him so much, I don't blame him for this and I see it as our issue, not just his and something we will face together. I love him and support him in whatever he wants to do and I want him to know that and I want him to feel safe and comfortable talking to me about this.
- I know no one can tell me anything without knowing his actual numbers, but from what I've researched (and I've been researching MFI for two years now), IUI isn't always recommended unless it's a mild male factor issue. Their fertility doctor had them do it four times in total and he did tell me at one point the RE wanted them to try it a couple more times before going onto IVF. Does anyone know anything about that? If it was a severe morphology problem would the doctor have told them to go straight to IVF?
- Also, any stories or support from anyone who has been through the same thing would be amazing!!! I don't know anyone who has experienced anything like this and so it would be nice to be able to talk to someone about it all.
Thanks in advance!!
Long story short - we are dealing with male factor infertility (sperm morphology, everything else is fine). I haven't had any tests done yet so as far as we know, that is our only issue. I actually got pregnant the first time we slept together but sadly, it ended in miscarriage at 6 weeks. I didn't know about his MFI at the time and only found out around 6 months later when he felt he could tell me, which is totally fine by me because I can understand how hard it must have been for him! I love him more than anything and even if we can't have children, I would rather be with him just the two of us than not be with him. Of course, we both really want a baby though, why else would I be here on this site?!
He was married for two years before meeting me and they were trying to get pregnant the whole time and they also had four IUI's and one IVF and nothing worked. She became obsessed with it, blamed him and it ended up being one of the reasons why their marriage fell apart. We have not been using birth control for the past two years and have not gotten pregnant. We haven't been aggressively trying but there have been a few months where we have managed to get the timing just right.
He doesn't like talking about the situation and gets uncomfortable whenever something comes up about it but I need him to talk to me about this. I understand how it would be difficult for him and it's no party for me either hearing about what he went through with his ex wife, but I would like to talk about it. I would just like to know exactly what we are dealing with, how severe the issue is and what he is open to in the future in order for us to have a baby.
Anyway... I have some questions from anyone who has experienced this.
- Does anyone have any suggestions to help him open up to me about the whole situation? I love him so much, I don't blame him for this and I see it as our issue, not just his and something we will face together. I love him and support him in whatever he wants to do and I want him to know that and I want him to feel safe and comfortable talking to me about this.
- I know no one can tell me anything without knowing his actual numbers, but from what I've researched (and I've been researching MFI for two years now), IUI isn't always recommended unless it's a mild male factor issue. Their fertility doctor had them do it four times in total and he did tell me at one point the RE wanted them to try it a couple more times before going onto IVF. Does anyone know anything about that? If it was a severe morphology problem would the doctor have told them to go straight to IVF?
- Also, any stories or support from anyone who has been through the same thing would be amazing!!! I don't know anyone who has experienced anything like this and so it would be nice to be able to talk to someone about it all.
Thanks in advance!!
