Need suggestions...

[Skylily4ever]

I need some opinions or suggestions on how I can do this to please both my husband and myself. So this might be more of a question for second time moms.

Ever since I got pregnant, I've been very adament about the baby sleeping in her crib as soon as possible. I really wanted her to start off there so we don't have problems switching over later. Now, I realize some babies don't take to cribs very well, so I planned on if that didn't work out, that we would do a bassinet. Neither of them I planned on having in our room. Our house is very open and echoes a lot, and I'm a very light sleeper, so I figured with all the doors open AND a baby monitor, that it would be okay to have her in her own room, which in all honesty is on the opposite end of the house, but I've had babies sleep in there before and I could hear them fairly easily from our room.

Well my husband is freaking out about something happening to her, he's gone to the extent he blew up our air mattress and put it on the floor of her room, he says he plans on sleeping in there until he feels she's old enough to be safe on her own. I mean, I'm worried sick about leaving her in there by herself too, but I figured in the long run it would be better for her. So now I'm questioning it. There's a bassinet at walmart that's only $50, I'm not gonna go buy a super expensive one IF I decide to. I'm wondering if maybe I should just get it and put it in our bedroom and start her off in there for the first month or two, when we get used to her waking and sleeping routines and whatnot, and to ease my husband's fears, since I don't want him sleeping in her room. There's a few problems though, like I said, I really wanted to try the crib first so she starts off in that and we wouldn't have to worry about switching over later (but we don't want to move the crib to our room). That, and if I do use the bassinet, I'm afraid my husband will STILL freak out when we try to switch her after a month or two.

So if anyone has some suggestions, or personal experiences that would help, I'd really appreciate it =]

 

[Lilly12]

Can't you co-sleep at night and put her in her crib during the day when she's napping?

 

[Sab4kids]

I had the same plans but after I brought my first home she ended up IN our bed for the first year, so did my other 2 so all 3 did! I breastfed all 3 so it was very convienent to have them in our room especially in the first few months when exhaustion sets in. I plan on having #4 in our room but this time in the crib as I want this baby to learn to sleep on its own too but also be close enough that I do not have go far in the night. Once the baby is home everything changes as you do not know what temperment your babe will have or how your feelings can change. My 1st was colicky and cried all night so that is how she ended up in our bed.

 

[Sophist]

You may find once she's here that you don't want her out of your line of sight!

There is no reason to spend a lot of money, the baby won't know the difference as long as its safe. With my kids, they slept in a bassinet in my room for the first few months, and in their cribs in their own bedroom for the daytime naps (closer to the main part of the house.) They didn't have problems switching back and forth.

I think its cute that your husband is being so protective. And, he may find that if he sleeps in her room a few nights, that he's more comfortable and relaxes a little.

Do you have a good baby monitor? Some are very sound sensitive so you can always hear what's going on with her.

 

[PeanutBean]

A few suggestions the first of which is that babies really don't do what you want them to do! We spent 8 weeks trying to get our son to sleep in a moses basket to the point that he was getting 9 hours sleep (about half what he should've had) and only during the day and we were getting zero hours sleep. We then shifted to cosleeping.

The reason that it is recommended for babies to be in the same room as mum for the first 6 months is not just so you can hear them when you are asleep (there's really no danger of NOT hearing a baby cry!) but because they hear your breathing and it helps to regulate their own. This is thought to be one reason why being in the same room contributes to a reduction in SIDS risk.

You don't really say why you don't want the baby in your room. If it's just about changing from one sleeping place to another, well, babies go through millions of changes they have to adapt to (and you as parents have to adapt to) and switching sleeping places is not that big a deal, unless you do it at teething time! I don't think you need to use a bassinet. We quickly gave up on the moses basket and when Byron wasn't cosleeping, during the day, he'd be in his cotbed which is pretty big and he liked it in there. Can you not fit the crib in your room as a compromise?

 

[camerashy]

awww i think thats lovely ur dh is so concerned and wants to be by her

personally we are putting dd3 in our room in a moses basket for a few months /or until she grows out of it and then will move her into her own room next to ours in a large cot .........we did the same for all our babies .......i bet when she arrives ur plans will change lol ............u wont wanna let her outta ur sight .......u'll be checking every few mins "is she breathing etc " dont worry we all do it xxx

 

[Armywife]

This was something i was pretty much set on too. Poppy ended up being in hospital for a while after birth having operations etc, when she came home at 8 weeks we had her in our room in a moses basket for 3 weeks, just whilst we all settled after a big scare with her health and lots of 'stopping breathing' episodes. Anyway, as soon as i felt we were back to 'normal' she went in her cot in her own room. Personally it was the best thing we did and i plan to do the same with this baby - in her own room straight away if possible.

Poppy has always been a wonderful, independant sleeper (never once have we rocked her to sleep etc, always gone down awake and got herself off to sleep) and i think the fact that we put her in her own room had something to do with this. Obviously everyone has different views and different things work for different families but for our family it was what we saw as practical and best suited for us & it worked perfectly.

 

[Etoille]

With DD we had her in a Graco Pack and Play with the sleeper attached to it till she was old enough to move over to her room at night. We put her down to nap in the crib during the day. The time goes by very quickly, so it didn't feel like she was in our room for very long.

Perhaps you could get a Moses basket?

 

[Armywife]

Oh, just to add, we did buy a sensor mat so we had a little extra assurance that she was ok. It worked perfectly for a good few months till she started rolling over in her sleep (but by that time she was old enough for us to be 110% comfortable with her sleeping alone anyway). Perhaps this could be an idea to put oh's mind at rest? This is the one we had for Poppy and will use this time...

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Angelcare-...f=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=baby&qid=1296499404&sr=8-1

 

[Skylily4ever]

Thanks everyone sooo much, I think I've made up my mind on what we are going to do, so it eases everyone's thoughts. I think we are going to do the crib during the day and a bassinet next to our bed for the night, and slowly have her sleep more in her crib, the more comfortable we get with her doing so. It's just, we lost one baby to a miscarriage and now I think we're so worried about everything going okay...

And thank you armywife! I'll have to look into that, even if she's just going to be in the crib for the days.

 

[Sophist]

So sorry for your loss hun.

 

[Armywife]

Thanks everyone sooo much, I think I've made up my mind on what we are going to do, so it eases everyone's thoughts. I think we are going to do the crib during the day and a bassinet next to our bed for the night, and slowly have her sleep more in her crib, the more comfortable we get with her doing so. It's just, we lost one baby to a miscarriage and now I think we're so worried about everything going okay...

And thank you armywife! I'll have to look into that, even if she's just going to be in the crib for the days.

I used it even in her moses basket hun xx