Nervous and private, but needing support

[Want2BMomX3]

Hi everyone. I'm 40 years old (that still feels weird to say) and a mother of two sons, 16 and 20. I'm also a grandmother to a 1.5 year old. I married the most wonderful man last New Year's Eve. He is 36 and has no children.
I always said I'd never do it again...well it turns out I lied. I'd happily do it again with the right partner.
So here I am, at a point in my life where it is very hard to share with friends and family that we are TTC. I'm very nervous that it won't work and I don't even know why.
I just finished the first month of trying and waiting after having an IUD for 3 years. I'm on a hormonal roller coaster now that it's gone, and I was convinced that my level of 'crazy' HAD to be pregnancy hormones, as was my husband. I've haven't been this weepy and over the top since we met. However, it doesn't look like it's worked this time and we will be moving on to cycle 2. I'm new to the TTC game, as I've never actually done this on purpose before lol.
Anyway, now that I've shared probably far too much, I will likely be here more to read than talk. I'm hoping reading about other women in my age range will help me stay slightly sane.
Good luck to all.

 

[lunamoona]

Hi Want2BMon

Why don't you pop over to 'Almost 44 final ttc journey'? There's only a few of us there and we all have different experiences of trying to do this on purpose later on in life. It's a great place for support and a safe place to discuss anything you want to.

 

[Stbh]

I love hearing your story because I am in a very similar situation. I'll be 40 next year and even though I have 4 children this is the first time it is a dileberate decision to ttc and finally with the right person. This is really all new to me.

I also had my IUD removed so that we could. I'm on my third cycle and nothing so far. I'm wondering what things could help since we have a small window before we need to stop. We could try again next year after the wedding but the reason for doing it now is so that we have the opportunity to have one more.

 

[Want2BMomX3]

Just an update! After months of trying, a DNC in February to improve fertility, and starting DHEA and CoQ10 about a month ago, I got a BFP - 3 days in a row. I'm over the moon happy but scared to death something will go wrong.
To anyone taking DHEA who has gotten pregnant - Did you stop taking DHEA immediately or need to continue taking it to make the bean stick? I made an appointment for Monday, but I wanted to see what others have done.

Thanks!!

 

[CaliDreaming]

Big congratulations to you!!!! Just goes to show you can never say never because no one knows what the future may bring!

I think the recommended advice is that you stop DHEA and coq10 and other supplements except prenatal type stuff while pregnant since they've done their job by then. I haven't seen anything that suggests that taking them during pregnancy is harmful, but just that possible effects haven't been studied and are of no benefit once you get pregnant.

I'm gearing up to TTC myself in a few months and I'll be 42. I started late and had my first child at 36 and second one at 39. I'm currently taking coq10 and L-carnitine for my egg health. Did a doctor advise you take the DHEA? I had read conflicting views on that one so I've held off on taking it.

 

[Want2BMomX3]

Thank you!
I was referred to a fertility specialist after the D&C because my OB did not think there was any chance of natural conception based on the numbers. We had already decided we would not pursue IVF, but went just to hear what the new dr. had to say. My bloodwork there did not seem quite as bad and the ultrasound showed a few good follicles, so we decided to keep going on our own. While there, I asked the dr. about DHEA and CoQ10 because I'd read about it on a fertility center website. She said she had absolutely no problem with me trying them. That was the extent of a doctor's involvement in that decision. However, my testosterone levels were on the low side during previous bloodwork last year, which really helped my decision to try it. What I read indicated that the reason to take DHEA is because lowered testosterone that happens with female aging reduces the quality of the eggs and DHEA should increase testosterone levels, thereby increasing egg quality.

All of this could be coincidence, as well. The D&C could be the real reason for the success. I really have no idea!

 

[CaliDreaming]

What a nice surprise after being counted out by your doctor! I wish fertility docs were more willing to think outside of the box instead of pushing people to do IVF, with how expensive it is.

Sounds like any of all of what you had been taking may have helped. Maybe I should look into DHEA further since you just never know what may do the trick.

Anyway, congratulations again to you and especially your hubby on your bfp!

 

[bumbleberry]

Congratulations!

 

[Want2BMomX3]

Thanks - though it's possible I've jumped the gun. I'm 13 DPO and just got a negative on a digital. I took another cheap test and it is still positive. I'll take another digital, this time Clearblue, on Saturday, but I can't help but worry. A lot.

 

[CaliDreaming]

Well you're still very early on and the digs are not quite as sensitive. I hope everything's okay. I know it's hard not to worry.

 

[Want2BMomX3]

I am happy to say I got a positive ClearBlue weeks estimator digital today! It says 2-3 weeks, so I am pretty sure things are right on track! I think it's starting to feel real...I'm sure it will be more so once I tell the hubs, lol.

 

[CaliDreaming]

Great news! I hope the rest of your pregnancy is uneventful. What a nice Mother's Day news.

 

[RubyRainbows]

Congrats!! How did it go telling your hubby??