New here. 38 and discouraged.

[Supernightowl]

Hello out there...

Thought I'd take a go with this forum as I'm having a really hard time emotionally with TTC and continually coming up no dice. I'm 38 and have been trying for about a year. Just recently had a bunch of tests and a polyp removed... everything looks good... low FSH (5.3), lots of eggs show up on U/S, good HSG test, and my partner's sperm count is apparently through the roof. Some blood tests show that my estradiol may be slightly high and my progesterone a little low on some cycles, so I'm not sure if that has anything to with anything. I could stand to lose about 30 lbs but am not at the point of being obese. I had two terminated pregnancies when I was very young, so I know at least 16-20 years ago it was not impossible for me.

I just had my first IUI with clomid, which did not seem to work. I am a few days from AF, but a PG test turned up negative today and I honestly do not think I am PG. It is so disappointing. I just feel like falling off of the face of the earth. I am angry at myself for waiting this long to start trying and can't get over the idea that I am somehow being punished. I know this is a bad attitude, but I'm really in the dumps today and cannot think about anything else. I am just sitting in my house feeling sorry for myself, as if that will help anything!

I don't know -- does anyone have words of encouragement or advice? Will losing weight do the trick? What is wrong with me?

 

[readyformore]

Failed fertility treatments are always really hard for me too.
Failing an unassisted cycle is difficult, but failing with IUI, (even though it doesn't really have a higher success rate), was almost unbearable.

No advice, but I can sympathize with you. TTC sucks. It's hard. It's disappointing. Working so hard for something so basic, and going absolutely nowhere, can make a sane person crazy.

I hope you feel better soon.

 

[Supernightowl]

Thanks, so much... I know I am not alone but I do feel so alone most of the time. It is all I can do not to give up my hope for just one baby. Tempted to jump to IVF and pay for all the costs if it will really make my chances better -- but the worst part for me is really not knowing what exactly is wrong or what might help, or if my situation is simply due to the fact that I am 38.

 

[PositiveUs]

I believe I just failed an ivf cycle, so I totally understand.
Not to diminish your pain, but seriously be happy about your numbers, hormone counts, follicle counts, no blockages. Thats all veeeeeeeeeeery important. Dont loose sight of that.

 

[readyformore]

I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility at the age of 24. It is VERY frustrating not to know what's wrong. But, then again, even if they found something wrong, it's not like it would make me pregnant. So, I guess it doesn't really matter.

Good luck with your IVF decision.

 

[2have4kids]

Hello out there...

Thought I'd take a go with this forum as I'm having a really hard time emotionally with TTC and continually coming up no dice. I'm 38 and have been trying for about a year. Just recently had a bunch of tests and a polyp removed... everything looks good... low FSH (5.3), lots of eggs show up on U/S, good HSG test, and my partner's sperm count is apparently through the roof. Some blood tests show that my estradiol may be slightly high and my progesterone a little low on some cycles, so I'm not sure if that has anything to with anything. I could stand to lose about 30 lbs but am not at the point of being obese. I had two terminated pregnancies when I was very young, so I know at least 16-20 years ago it was not impossible for me.

I just had my first IUI with clomid, which did not seem to work. I am a few days from AF, but a PG test turned up negative today and I honestly do not think I am PG. It is so disappointing. I just feel like falling off of the face of the earth. I am angry at myself for waiting this long to start trying and can't get over the idea that I am somehow being punished. I know this is a bad attitude, but I'm really in the dumps today and cannot think about anything else. I am just sitting in my house feeling sorry for myself, as if that will help anything!

I don't know -- does anyone have words of encouragement or advice? Will losing weight do the trick? What is wrong with me?

You seem to be in the exact same boat as me except for the part where I'm 36 but don't have great numbers like you. high fsh (16) only 1 follie on u/s etc. Just had iui and I'm waiting (cd23), but I don't feel anything, nada, no change nothing. I'm not getting my hopes up, If this round doesn't work we've agreed to try ivf. At least then they can harvest/freeze some of my eggs and give us a chance for future years of having more children. It's so expensive though, we're really going to be strapped for cash if we have to foot the bill for ivf. I'm also terrified of them going in there so invasively grabbing my eggs. The acupuncture lady told me she's seen people waddle in there looking like cowboys after egg retrieval, I think it was a silly ignorant remark to make but nevertheless I have this terrible idea that it'll be really painful in the most private part of my body.
I'm sending you hugs and positive thoughts, i know it's discouraging trying so hard and then being let down. Try not to be too hard on yourself. It'll happen, keep trying!
I recently discovered this forum and it's made me laugh so hard I cried. It's really a spirit lifter: https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/labour-birth/696911-funny-embarrasing-labour-stories-1.html
I hope it takes your mind off things

 

[lori4dmb]

Hello to everyone! I am new to here as well, I am going to be 48 next week, and TTC # 5...I too get discouraged, but I know it can happen Stay positive everyone and good luck to all!