collie_crazy
1 Angel, 1 rainbow growin
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2011
- Messages
- 1,499
- Reaction score
- 0
This last week although I feel like I have been 'coping' more through the day I have been suffering from really nasty nightmares. They are almost always about trying to get something / somewhere and not being able to quite reach it - or involve my OH doing something horrible to me 
In one of them I was on a dirt bike in the middle of a desert and I was trying to get to the top of a huge sand dune but could only get half way and would roll back down. After trying and trying I got off the bike and made it to the top of the sand dune on foot only to look around and see that there was 100 other large sand dunes all surronding me.
In the other it was a nightmare in which I was lying in my own bed asleep - but I 'woke up' (still in the nightmare) when my OH who had been lying beside me started clawing at me - ripping open my skin, shredding it. I was reaching out and calling out for my dogs who sleep at the side of the bed and when they turned to me there was blood dripping from their fangs and they were eating bits of me that my OH had shredded. I woke up from this one screaming, tears streaming down my face, physically shaking and actually had to get up and run to the toilet because I was physically sick
I couldnt get back to sleep for hours after it because I was so scared - that feeling even stayed with me into the next day.
These are just 2 of them - but they are always along the same lines. I feel scared to go to sleep at night now and I dont know what to do / how I can stop them. I'm also having the 'sleep paralysis' type of nightmare - where you are semi-concious and know that you are lying in bed asleep but are trying to wake yourself up but cant open your eyes - in these I am screaming at myself to open my eyes but cant - cant move my arms / legs etc. I know there is a word for these type of nightmare but cant remember it! They are horrible too.
I told my doctor about them and she just said its my subconcious working its way through events, the fear I have etc. And I know this, I studied Psychology to honours degree level so I do understand I just know how to stop them Its driving me crazy.
Has anyone else suffered nightmares after losing their baby? Am I going insane? Will they ever stop
In one of them I was on a dirt bike in the middle of a desert and I was trying to get to the top of a huge sand dune but could only get half way and would roll back down. After trying and trying I got off the bike and made it to the top of the sand dune on foot only to look around and see that there was 100 other large sand dunes all surronding me.
In the other it was a nightmare in which I was lying in my own bed asleep - but I 'woke up' (still in the nightmare) when my OH who had been lying beside me started clawing at me - ripping open my skin, shredding it. I was reaching out and calling out for my dogs who sleep at the side of the bed and when they turned to me there was blood dripping from their fangs and they were eating bits of me that my OH had shredded. I woke up from this one screaming, tears streaming down my face, physically shaking and actually had to get up and run to the toilet because I was physically sick
I couldnt get back to sleep for hours after it because I was so scared - that feeling even stayed with me into the next day. These are just 2 of them - but they are always along the same lines. I feel scared to go to sleep at night now and I dont know what to do / how I can stop them. I'm also having the 'sleep paralysis' type of nightmare - where you are semi-concious and know that you are lying in bed asleep but are trying to wake yourself up but cant open your eyes - in these I am screaming at myself to open my eyes but cant - cant move my arms / legs etc. I know there is a word for these type of nightmare but cant remember it! They are horrible too.
I told my doctor about them and she just said its my subconcious working its way through events, the fear I have etc. And I know this, I studied Psychology to honours degree level so I do understand I just know how to stop them
Its driving me crazy. Has anyone else suffered nightmares after losing their baby? Am I going insane? Will they ever stop
it has been going away but I think my nerves are so bad that is my bodies way of showing me I need to slow down and calm down/ I am sorry I am not helping here, but I really think these awful dreams will stop in time, your body has been through so much that your brain is trying to kick in and help your body physically deal with this pain. I hope you don't think I am a nut. 
I screamed and dropped the test stick but when it landed it was a baby and the baby shattered into tiny pieces. I woke up at that point 
