Netiboo I know your frustration - I have no kids yet and have been ttc for 5+ years. I'm sorry for the long post I just feel I can relate to your frustration soo much. I was diagnosed with dininished ovarian reserve and immune issues on top of that. I have clotting issues (PAI-1 & Thrombophelia and inflammation) so the 2 times I was able to conceive I mc'd at 8 weeks. I was a BMI 30 and underwent the sleeve procedure to help me lose weight. My bf who happens to be a nurse told me that I may not respond to ivf drugs being over weight. I was gearing up for IF treatments at that time. So with my new small tummy, growling gone and new way of eating (high protein always from now on as doctors mandate), I lost 70 lbs in 1 year and my hypothyroid issue disappeared. I was treated for my immune issues 7 months ago and started exercising like a mad woman 2 months ago to try to lose my last 30 lbs taking me from a BMI 24 down to 20. I've had 3 local ivf's with no response (it wasn't due to weight, only due to diminished ovarian reserve diagnosis) and 3 donor egg ivf's and I've finally fallen pregnant naturally last month.
I truly believe you hit the nail on the head, hormones are locked up in fat and we do not function properly when we have extra fat on our bodies. Many get lucky and get to conceive with drugs or even a modified diet (sooo many PCOS women can start having cycles again just by changing their diet without even losing the weight!) I knew the cards were stacked against me in so many ways and I was so unhappy with my body and being childless, well I don't think what I did is right for everyone but I did what I HAD to do. And I also found out about my immune issues.
PCOS research shows you can change things by cutting out carbs, bread, cereal, pasta, crackers, starchy veg ie sweet potato, potatoes, and other high sugar veggies like beets. They cause an insulin response and trigger insulin resistance. It's a massive tax on your body systems and so many hormonal challenges are effected by high sugar - not just chips & candy, processed foods - bread, cereal & pasta are processed foods. The other key for me was sweating 3-5 times/week. You can be over weight but exercise can make the hormones work in a body that has fat layers slowing the hormones from working. Our bodies are designed to gain weight for survival and with the food they sell, oh gowd, it's so easy lol. Now that I'm pregnant I have to make double sure I don't have bread, pasta, rice, crackers - stuff that I loooove because it causes so much inflammation. Do you wake up with red eyes? Have tummy bloating? Have a puffy face ever? Ever tried going completely carb free and seen how your face can chance in a matter of 2 weeks? Carbs hold water and convert directly to sugar. Veg & meat are slightly diuretic, veg had loads of fiber helping you loose fat. Protein keeps everything working: brain, organs, concentration, keeps us full for hours , ever try a full protein breakfast vs full carb? I'm ready for more food in an hour after carby breakfast but give me a little cottage cheese or greek yoghurt, egg & kiwi and I'm good for hours. In bariatrics the golden rule is you eat your protein first, then your veg and if there's any room for the carbs try a few forks of what we call the 'filler' on your plate and leave the rest. Unless I'm looking to mc, eating veg, limited fruits, and clean protein is what I have to do. We went out for Vietnamese and I had the soup, they're more than happy to replace all noodles with veg for me. High carb also triples the propensity for clotting while pregnant (pregnancy hormones increase this as well)with those who have immune issues - Lucky me
High sugar, ie bread, pasta, cereal, rice-high carb diet in just moderate servings/day contribute to poor egg quality too, in an accidental find in a diabetes study, the eggs showed they have bumpy nodules on them with even a moderately carby diet.
There's a fantastic website if you want to read any of these studies. Unfortunately the website is 'framed' around mc however the studies themselves are all about fertility. Everything you've ever wanted to know about the effects of vitamins, exercise, foods, diagnosed conditions like PCOS. I think I used to make the mistake thinking that buying many of the supplements that show positive fertility performance would help me get knocked up lol. Food and exercise effects conception in monumental ways, much more significantly than any supplement or drug can single handedly effect things.
https://sites.google.com/site/miscarriageresearch/hormones-and-miscarriage/pcos/pcos-causes
I hope this helps inspire you, keep your chin up and give that child a warm squishy hug. You still have time, keep trying!
