Not sure how to explain this ... Access guidance needed

[emlubu]

ok well where to start or even how.....
Girl meets guy in a bar 5 years ago now, i was at university at the time so the first year was spent us both travel alternate weekends to see each other.... life was good... treated great and happy.

whilst at uni i became pregant and graduated at 7 months pregnant, things which pregnant in our relationship was challenging but we got over them and carryed on, we moved in together a nice lil house and after a very looooong and complicated pregnancy had a baby girl christmas eve 2009.

after having a baby you are pushed to the limits in a relationship but you get over them and have good times.

to cut a long story short march just gone i was admtted into hospital with appendisitis. when returning home me and my husband was having trouble getting on and virtally ignoring each other...never spent time together...very weird... i was on the internet one night and found he had another women... so we split up i took our daughter and went and lived in another house.

he was having regular contact but things got nasty from then on... he has been round to mine on 2 occation being violent once when our daughter was in bed alseep and constantly ringing the door bell and trying to smash the door in and windows and one with our daughter in his arms.... so i went and got a solcitor as this needs sorting.
he has suffered with depression before and tryed to comit suicide before i met him and threatened to recently... now the solicitor advised not to give unsupervised access and to only have supervised which he has refused to have....

what are your views on this .... should he have access supervised or not..
he has a solicitor now and said she wants all access renstated altho we r still awaiting that letter but she is paid to be against me and for him.

so unsure at the moment on what to do...

 

[AbbynChloe]

I hope you are ok. IMO he def should not have unsupervised access and you should do what your solicitor is telling you.

Violence is never ok, esp in front of Children. He sounds dangerous xxxxxxxxxx

 

[emlubu]

he is unpredicable its horrible to think you know somebody and this happens....i have not refused him access but obv supervised but cos he doesnt want supervised he has not seen her for 2 weeks now.

but his solicitor said she wants all care back into place... i hope my solicitor is going to fight tht remark...

 

[AbbynChloe]

Well the solicitor can only advise, they have to do what you want.

I'm sorry I haven't had any experience but you can always sound out your concerns here!!

 

[emlubu]

yeh i know its hard, obvously want her to see her dad but i guess he has to prove himself now... ideally i would like 6 months supervised then if ok to have her after that maybe...just not sure.

 

[AbbynChloe]

Sounds like a good plan to me, and if he was decent and wanting to prove he can be a good Dad, it shouldn't be an issue??xxxxxx

 

[Mommi2Be]

I had a protection order against FOB for about a month while I was pregnant. He has a history of depression and admits that he has anger issues and has thought heavily about suicide. It's a known fact at our work that he has anger problems. However, we had one court date in regards to the protection order and the judge did not care whatsoever about any of that and threw the order out.

So, I guess it's okay for him to be angry, hostile, depressed, drinking alone, and thinking about suicide. The judge thought FOB is a great guy!