Officially WTT for #2. But when?

[Ashley1021]

Hi everyone! My name is Ashley, and I will officially be joining you all. My OH and I have an 11 month old son, and I am anxiously WTT. We aren't exactly financially stable, but we aren't struggling. We currently live with my mother. We have agreed to start trying when we have our own place. Which seems like never!

I did just get a job promotion, and will be making $4.50 more An hour as a lead toddler daycare teacher. My OH is an assistant manager at a tire store and should hopefully be promoted soon. It seems we are finally getting ahead and thing happen. We had to buy a new car, and our second one just died. 😓

 

[krissie328]

Hey- I am also waiting to try for number 2. I am waiting more for ds to mature more and sleep better. Also, for me to feel emotionally ready. I have struggled more than I anticipated with DS. Mostly because dh works opposite shift as me so I am the only caregiver all week and even on weekends he's only around a few hours a day. So it's either get a break or spend time with him.

For now I am aiming to start trying next May.

 

[Ashley1021]

My 11 month old still sleeps like crap! And my OH works 7 am-9 pm. I work 7:30-4:30 which makes me the main caregiver. I'm usually asleep by the time my oh gets home so I usually only see him on Sunday's. It's really a bummer!

 

[krissie328]

Sounds like us. I work 8-4 and he works 4-2:30. But not much we can do. He loves his job and won't change shifts until his position opens which isn't expected for 5-7 years. And my job is a daytime job.

 

[AliJo]

Hey! I thought I kind of recognized your profile picture then after reading your post I'm pretty sure I saw you on forum when I was pregnant with my son. Especially since we were due in the same month!

I'm WTT for #2 as well! Really been thinking about it lately! We also aren't financially stable right now, but not struggling. My fiancé makes decent money and is going to be making around 3 dollars more than he is now beginning next year. Then after I graduate I'll be able to land a good paying job. I'm going onto my second semester for my associate degree of nursing and I'll be done in May! I'm honestly thinking about aiming for around May or surrounding months. Which life could throw me some hurdles, but I'm going to be optimistic that it'll work out!

The biggest things I would like to have done before we try for another is to be married and obviously be finishing up with college. We did plan to get married at the end of this year but had to hold off so I could finish up my education.

My son also doesn't sleep the best, but I think it's getting better. We've made some progress although he's kind of regressed some. Just going to keep pushing forward!

 

[kksy9b]

We are waiting for #2 as well...probably going to start trying in April.

I hear you ladies on the sleep issues! My DS is just over 16 months. He started napping very well around 11 months but has always been a TERRIBLE nighttime sleeper. I was the only one who could get him down, would be up multiple times to eat (even when not hungry would only soothe with nursing). Would not put himself to sleep or self soothe. We also partially co-slept, which there is nothing wrong with, but needed to get away from before trying for another.

Something clicked though right before he turned 16 months. Started putting himself to sleep at night, self weaned at night (still nurses once before nap) and will soothe himself in the middle of the night (usually wakes up once for a couple minutes and is back down). Goes to bed around 7:30 and sleeps 12 hours at night. Flip side is, he is now not napping But I think it's just from the shift in his nighttime. Today he actually dozed an hour in the AM so I'll take it as a sign we are heading back to good day (and night!) sleep. Not really any advice other than to do what feels right and eventually they will get it. We now have a very set nighttime routine..bath and get jammies on, brush teeth, read books, rock, in bed. Seems to help but didn't work before until he weaned.

What are the things you all are nervous about with #2? I think what worries me the most is having a long nurser and bad sleeper like DS. He used to eat an hour + at a time. I'm not sure how to handle that while also corralling a toddler! I'm also scared of having less time with DS. He is a really big Momma's boy (and I'm pretty attached too, lol) and I don't want him to feel like he is being replaced. I know it will all work out, it's just kind of scary to think about now!

 

[AliJo]

I started to wean a bit earlier than I wanted to only because trying to keep up with breastfeeding and school was almost too much. I also had to supplement because I couldn't keep production up with clinicals and classes. He's now completely weaned as of a few days ago. I'm hoping it might help with his sleep habits. We also semi co-sleep which I'm trying to break, but my OH works overnights and the bed gets lonely! I also need to establish a good nighttime routine. He sort of has one, but it's not consistent enough.

I'm nervous about a lot of the same things as you kksy. My son didn't nurse for long periods, but he constantly nursed. He seemed to want to snack all day instead of settle down for a good long feeding. I'm also a bit nervous that everything won't go as smooth. I had a very easy pregnancy, even though I went back to classes a week after having DS but he has been so good! I think the unknown is a bit unnerving no matter how you look at it. It will work out! Every day is a mystery and somehow we get through it.

 

[Ashley1021]

I had a terrible pregnancy, accompanied by a terrible birth, and then a terrible sleeper. �� I had outrageously high blood pressure and had many hospital stays.

 

[AliJo]

I'm sorry Ashley! I always thought if my pregnancy was harder on me I wouldn't be as eager as I am now. I do try to remind myself that it could be a lot harder next time around.

I hope your next pregnancy goes much smoother!

 

[krissie328]

Ashley.

I had and easy pregnancy and birth. I did end up with awful high blood sugar but that is all I struggles with and have learned a lot since then.

I've evened had an easy going baby. We've struggled some with feeding and off and on with sleeping. The poor sleeping makes me hesitate for #2. I need ds sleeping better for sure. Ideally sttn but I would take one nightly waking.

 

[SoupDragon]

I'm LTWTT for #2...DD is 10.5 months, and we won't be having another until she is 3 or 4 at the earliest. The childcare costs for two would cripple us, so we have to wait until DD gets her 3 year funding, or if that's not going to be enough, until she's at school. She should start school in Sept 2019, just before she turns 5.

By that time, me and DH will both be 38, so if we can TTC any sooner than that it'd definitely be a good idea. But we're not anywhere near ready, emotionally or financially. I have PND, and it's strained things quite a lot...I'm not sure we could handle a second round of that so soon! We'll get through it and it's going to be fine, but we're not ready yet.

It doesn't stop me being so badly broody though. I really want to be pregnant again, and I want a 'do-over' with the birth and breastfeeding, as neither went the way I wanted with DD.

 

[Ashley1021]

Breastfeeding and giving birth was terrible for me! I would also like a do over! Daycare is so expensive, but since I am a teacher at the center, I get a 70% discount on childcare. So I pay like $1.35 an hour for my almost one year old to attend. When he moves to the toddler room in a few months it will be around $1.20.

 

[SoupDragon]

Breastfeeding and giving birth was terrible for me! I would also like a do over! Daycare is so expensive, but since I am a teacher at the center, I get a 70% discount on childcare. So I pay like $1.35 an hour for my almost one year old to attend. When he moves to the toddler room in a few months it will be around $1.20.

Oh, I'm sorry you had a tough time too...it sucks. DD was 10lb 2oz and positioned back to back so her head couldn't come down far enough and even though I was dilating, it was very slow - I got stuck at 6cm for a whole day before getting to 9cm after an epi, and then my cervix swelled up and went back to 6cm, so I had an emcs

DD had a tongue tie which wasn't spotted til she was 9 weeks old, and she just couldn't latch. She managed to breastfeed a handful of times, with a midwife there to position her, but I only got it to work once by myself, even though I kept trying for months. So I've been wedded to my breast pump since October and I don't want to go through it again.

At least I know what to look for and where to go for help if #2 has trouble bf-ing, and they're going to keep a closer eye on me/baby next time during pregnancy as they reckon I must have had GD to have such a big baby - I'm only small and DH is average size.

That's great that you have reduced childcare costs and can be near yoyr son! We pay £3.50ph ($5.50) for childcare, it averages out at about £590 ($925) per month. From January 2018 until she starts school in September 2019, we will get government funding for 15 hours of childcare each week during term-time, and there's talk of increasing that to 30 hours, so that will help massively, but we're on our own until then!

 

[krissie328]

I cannot believe the costs of child care! At our most expensive daycare the cost for a newborn and 2 year old would be around $950. Fortunately we have been blessed and will just be starting daycare one day a week in September for ds at $80 a month. My mom and friend have otherwise watched him. I am hoping to enroll him in daycare part time in the spring (3 days a week at a different daycare than the one.he's starting in September). We are currently on a wait list so we will see. Then when #2 comes have them in the same arrangement until 2 and start daycare then.

 

[AliJo]

I've been fortunate enough to almost completely avoid child care. I did have him in an in home daycare for a month, but she was unsafe and I pulled him out without notice. Other than that my aunt usually watches him and sometimes a friend. I'm going to have to get him in somewhere eventually, but I feel like I'm going to have a hard time finding a place I like.

 

[ellavisions]

I'm also WTT for #2. My daughter is 3 and a half and will be starting school on September 8th.
I'm working on (finally) getting my license, which should happen in the next month or so, and then we will be looking to buy our first home (we have been renting thus far.)
Once that all falls into place, hopefully within the next 6 months, we will start TTC.

I just remember being SO SICK with my daughter. My morning sickness was off the scale, throwing up 6-7 times + a day. I hope this one will be a little easier in that regard.

 

[schultzie18]

Hello. I have a 16 month old and would like to start trying in May. She turns 2 in May and I would like there to be about 3 years different. I figured by then dd will be potty trained and that will help. I had a really bad pregnancy and labor. Ended up dd was in the nicu for a couple of weeks so, a bit scared to try again. Happy to see some of you will be trying in may too.

 

[ellavisions]

Hello. I have a 16 month old and would like to start trying in May. She turns 2 in May and I would like there to be about 3 years different. I figured by then dd will be potty trained and that will help. I had a really bad pregnancy and labor. Ended up dd was in the nicu for a couple of weeks so, a bit scared to try again. Happy to see some of you will be trying in may too.

Hoping to try before then here but my daughter will be almost 4 by then.
Funny tidbit, your LO was born on my birthday.

 

[schultzie18]

Hello. I have a 16 month old and would like to start trying in May. She turns 2 in May and I would like there to be about 3 years different. I figured by then dd will be potty trained and that will help. I had a really bad pregnancy and labor. Ended up dd was in the nicu for a couple of weeks so, a bit scared to try again. Happy to see some of you will be trying in may too.

Hoping to try before then here but my daughter will be almost 4 by then.
Funny tidbit, your LO was born on my birthday.

Must be a great day then! . I was so sick with her the entire pregnancy too. I can't even imagine being that sick again with lo to watch after but it will be worth it.

 

[krissie328]

Hello. I have a 16 month old and would like to start trying in May. She turns 2 in May and I would like there to be about 3 years different. I figured by then dd will be potty trained and that will help. I had a really bad pregnancy and labor. Ended up dd was in the nicu for a couple of weeks so, a bit scared to try again. Happy to see some of you will be trying in may too.

We are also going to be ttc in May. DS will be 2 in July and I wanted a similar age gap hoping to get DS potty trained and sleeping through the night. I am excited to try again but nervous. We tried for two months this summer and it was draining as we did a medicated cycle that failed. But we realized we weren't ready for #2 yet.