Opinions please... I want another baby!!!

[jellybean20]

I initially posted this in the Wtt forum but feel its better suited to here! Some basic background. I have a daughter who is nearly 26 months. Me and her dad were together for a few years broke up found out I was pregnant. We have a good relationship still sees baby every week and has now got a job and gives her a little money! Basically I really don't want her to be an only child for many reasons and would love another baby. Would love to experience the whole planned pregnancy thing and excitement about the new baby. I own my own home, have a good job and consider myself to be a good mum. I've only spoke to a few people about this but they mainly think its a bad idea.... Opinions please???? EDIT just to be clear the current plan is to have another baby with my ex!

 

[Dezireey]

I dont think its a bad idea if you want to do it again with someone you love and who supports you. Why do others think its a bad idea?

 

[jellybean20]

I don't need a man to support me raising my children more than capable doing that myself ( with help from my mum) would ideally like my children to have the same dad and me and my daughters father have discussed this and he has agreed!! people appear to be under the impression that you should be married and can only raise children as a couple but all us girls here know that's untrue. I know it's unconventional but is that a bad thing??

 

[3Beans]

I don't think it's a "bad" thing and I agree at you don't need a man around or to be married to successfully raise a child, however, if given the option to have both mom & dad together raising a child or having them apart I think many would agree that together is better. This won't be your only chance to have another child an there may be an opportunity down the road where you meet a great guy who wants to have kids with you. Would you still have more then?

 

[jellybean20]

Having a family with someone else isn't ruled out but unless I bump into them in a supermarket, toddler club or my car it's unlikely. Plus I'm totally unable to focus on or put anyone before my daughter so am rubbish in relationships. But still think it would be good for my daughter to have a proper sibling. Someone who would always be there for her like the relationship I have with my sister. It's not something I'm planning on doing immediately gonna have a proper think but thought it would be a good idea to seek others opinions.

 

[Ceejay123]

If the father is a good Dad to your LO and wants to be around for another LO i don't really see the problem in it myself. x

 

[beanzz]

If the father is a good Dad to your LO and wants to be around for another LO i don't really see the problem in it myself. x

Exactly this.

 

[Dezireey]

oh right, I took your words to mean you wanted to do it with a partner. it's not an ideal situation and I wouldn't do it myself but that stems from coming from a home with two parents who love each other and wanting that for my child and my FOB took that away from him, so sore point really, well I guess it's a sore point for a few of us here, as you can tell, most of us didnt want to do this alone but now don't have a choice. I think if it's what you want, you can cope, don't need a relationship with the Dad etc, why not? If you can provide for your babies and give them tons of love, there shouldn't be a problem.

 

[teal]

It's not something I would personally do but if you and your ex are happy to do it then that's great and I don't see a problem with it.

 

[jellybean20]

Thank you soo much for all your replies. My daughter is much older than many off your little ones so have had a lot more time to come to terms with the situation. My daughter would love a sibling and I would love another baby and to have the 'proper' pregnancy experience. I come from a ' normal' family two parents two siblings, infact i dont even know any other single parent familys. i don't feel my daughter should suffer and miss out due to the decisions her father made in the past. This post prob seems quiet Jumbled as its still just an idea and there are loads off pro's and con's to consider.

 

[mummyof3babas]

i think its fine tbh, hes ur childs dad and id probly wanna do the same if i was in ur situation at least they will be propa blood siblings and he will stick by them both good luck on what u chose

 

[Shezza84uk]

It's a very personal decision I wouldn't have another child with anyone else I have siblings from different father/mother and because I am the oldest I see them as siblings however they struggle with accepting we have different mother or father. I did not want that for my daughter although my son wasn't planned I found out just as my ex walk away but there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted my baby and felt a huge sense of relief that they will have each other for support.

If I was on good terms with my ex and we were clear about or arrangement or the role he will play I would definatly agree to have another child.