dragonfly1982
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As the heading says, this is an OT post and I hope I haven't put it in the wrong place! Sorry if I have! Here goes:
My husband and I are brand newly married, a month since Saturday!
We're so happy and all we want now is to start a family, have wanted it for a while actually but with the wedding and all we just had to postpone ttc! I've been off the pill for a year to get my body ready and period regulated etc and we stopped using condoms the week before the wedding. We were not actually ttc at the time, we wanted to wait til my next cycle, which we did and now I'm 5DPO in the middle of our first ever TWW.
So that's the back story - here's my problem!
My best friend, who was a bridesmaid at our wedding, has been going out with her OH for 10 years. They're happy, but no sign of an engagement. She has told me before that this does not matter to her, as long as they can have a baby when HE's ready - she's been ready for about 3/4 years! So at the weekend we got to talking and she said to me she is just sick of everyone getting married all around her (her sister is getting married in a couple of months and several of our friends are too) and she said she feels like her life has just came to a standstill. I commiserated (sp?) with her and she just asked me not to talk about my wedding any more (fair enough, it was a little hurtful considering I had just told her we were getting our wedding video next week and I wanted her to see it but I said I wouldn't mention weddings any more, even though she told me before it was a non issue for her) Then she said "Oh I bet you're going to have a baby next! That's so not fair, I wanted one first!" I honestly didn't know how to react - part of me was hurt that she'd look at it like a competition - its a baby for crying out loud! But the bigger part of me just felt so sorry for her that I told her that we wouldn't be ttc for another while and gave a story about how the timing is wrong etc. She brightened up considerably after that and things were ok between us, if a little strained, after that! I did tell DH when I came back home and he told me that her OH actually has an engagement ring and whole proposal planned so all she has to do is be patient. I'm delighted for her!
But my problem is - we ARE ttc, even though its a secret and we haven't told anyone as we just want it to be something private and special the two of us can share for a while but I'm so worried now that if I am pregnant (or when I eventually get pregnant, fingers crossed!) how is she going to take it? Is our friendship going to be completely destroyed because of this? I know thinking I'm pregnant is just wishful thinking (probably) at this stage but I just know my best friend will be heart broken when it does happen! How should I act girls? Cause I was supposed to meet her for lunch today and I cancelled. If she brings up the baby topic again how should I react? She was so accusatory at the weekend
And I hate this cause she is genuinely my best friend in the world and I'd be lost without her!! Any advice ladies?
My husband and I are brand newly married, a month since Saturday!
We're so happy and all we want now is to start a family, have wanted it for a while actually but with the wedding and all we just had to postpone ttc! I've been off the pill for a year to get my body ready and period regulated etc and we stopped using condoms the week before the wedding. We were not actually ttc at the time, we wanted to wait til my next cycle, which we did and now I'm 5DPO in the middle of our first ever TWW. So that's the back story - here's my problem!
My best friend, who was a bridesmaid at our wedding, has been going out with her OH for 10 years. They're happy, but no sign of an engagement. She has told me before that this does not matter to her, as long as they can have a baby when HE's ready - she's been ready for about 3/4 years! So at the weekend we got to talking and she said to me she is just sick of everyone getting married all around her (her sister is getting married in a couple of months and several of our friends are too) and she said she feels like her life has just came to a standstill. I commiserated (sp?) with her and she just asked me not to talk about my wedding any more (fair enough, it was a little hurtful considering I had just told her we were getting our wedding video next week and I wanted her to see it but I said I wouldn't mention weddings any more, even though she told me before it was a non issue for her) Then she said "Oh I bet you're going to have a baby next! That's so not fair, I wanted one first!" I honestly didn't know how to react - part of me was hurt that she'd look at it like a competition - its a baby for crying out loud! But the bigger part of me just felt so sorry for her that I told her that we wouldn't be ttc for another while and gave a story about how the timing is wrong etc. She brightened up considerably after that and things were ok between us, if a little strained, after that! I did tell DH when I came back home and he told me that her OH actually has an engagement ring and whole proposal planned so all she has to do is be patient. I'm delighted for her!
But my problem is - we ARE ttc, even though its a secret and we haven't told anyone as we just want it to be something private and special the two of us can share for a while but I'm so worried now that if I am pregnant (or when I eventually get pregnant, fingers crossed!) how is she going to take it? Is our friendship going to be completely destroyed because of this? I know thinking I'm pregnant is just wishful thinking (probably) at this stage but I just know my best friend will be heart broken when it does happen! How should I act girls? Cause I was supposed to meet her for lunch today and I cancelled. If she brings up the baby topic again how should I react? She was so accusatory at the weekend
And I hate this cause she is genuinely my best friend in the world and I'd be lost without her!! Any advice ladies?
