Other peoples children when visiting

[Foxybabyhg3]

Hi All

Upon leaving NICU no one gave any guidelines as such on visitors with children. I've read on here and on the net about seclusion and going into hibernation for the winter.

I have a couple of friends desperate to visit but I know they can't/won't without their children. Both of them are always posting on Facebook about their LO's being ill, one of them with Scarlet Fever in the last couple of weeks. The latter Mum I was chatting to online last week. I'd said about nipping into work (I work with both of these mums) before closing the doors for cold/flu season and I said "well, you'd get it anyway with your niece being prem" she said absolutely not and her sister was never told to keep her preemie away from other school age/day care children. And I shouldn't keep them away as they want to visit me.

So basically I don't know who's right. I just don't want to put Skylar at any risk at all. Seriously, their kids seem to be ALWAYS ill and I know kids pick up all sorts but they don't seem to understand that Skylar is more vulnerable just now.

What do you ladies think?

 

[jandksmommy]

It is far better to be safe and true friends will understand. Personally, I allowed visitors but with conditions (these conditions were strongly recommended by the NICU staff). If anyone in the family was not feeling well or had recently spent a lot of time with someone not feeling well, they were told to wait until they had no illness symptoms before coming over. When they came over, anyone who wanted to touch or hold my preemie had wash their hands and then use hand sanitizer (just like entering the NICU). And the most important condition, according to her NICU doctor, all kisses were to the top of her head (no where on her face) and no one was allowed to touch her hands. Babies put hands to face for comfort almost as soon as they are born so I was told it was most important to keep people from touching her hands.

Some people gave me a hard time about being so strict about it but I didn't care. After 4 months of watching her struggle in the NICU, I wasn't risking having her back in hospital.

 

[AP]

I wasnt so strict as such (but only one kid around, being my sister who was 7) but if her kids are always coming down with something then, yep, I'd just say the NICU told you to

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

Thanks ladies. I'll stick with the "NICU said so"

 

[Srrme]

We didn't allow our premature babies around other children for a while, especially around RSV/Flu/Cold season! It wasn't worth the risk to me.

 

[SleepyBaby]

My aunt had prem twins, we where only allowed to visit if we used hand cleaner before we held either twin ! Anyone with as much as a throat tickle was not allowed in and we kinda kept the younger kids in the kitchen with an adult while we visited the babies, my uncle stayed with the kids for 5 mins until we got a wee hello, we just kinda understood they where teeny and needed the mom and pops, a visit was hello, have a card n pressie, hello babys, see ya later if you need anything let us know

 

[lanaross]

Three different doctors told me to just use common sense but not to overprotect. Grey's pedi though said to absolutely avoid schools and daycares (DD goes to school) until he's 2-3 months as a slight fever would bring him back to NICU with tons of painful tests and procedures

 

[sunnylove]

I'm wary about kids being around my son, for sure! Everyone knows that they have to wash their hands and sanitize first. The only kids who have held him are two of his uncles (ages 17 and 12, so not that young), my brother (6 yrs) and my two nieces (7 yrs, 4 yrs). The last three kids are all homeschooled and do not attend daycare, which is why I'm more comfortable with them holding/being around the baby, although they do not hold him very long anyway. My other nieces are in public school where there is currently hand, foot and mouth disease going around, and they will probably not be allowed to visit for awhile... I feel bad about it, but people understand in the long run, I think.

But I have found it difficult to tell people no. Some people just expect to hold your baby, even if it's like your mom's friend's aunt or something, and they just don't get it. But do what your doing! Go on lockdown for the winter. I personally do not let kids hold my baby if they go to public school (unless they are like, teenagers) or daycare.

 

[GettingBroody]

I think you have to use common sense. There are so many different factors at play that no situation is going to be the same. If your lo is still considered vulnerable or at risk or if the visiting child is sick then definitely no holding (and probably best to ask your friend to leave the sick child at home too). If on the other hand your lo is strong and well with no health issues and your friend's child isn't ill and washes his/her hands then I wouldn't see a problem with it. I think over-protecting can carry its own risks...

 

[sbl]

I have allot of nephews and I let them visit provided they were well.
I told lots of people to stay away.
I left hand sanitiser next to her mosses basket and I wasn't shy about saying to them to use it.
I think its a little different for late preterm babies though, lo was born at 35 weeks. I prob would have allowed no visitors at all had lo been born very early.

 

[ShelbyLC]

I wouldn't let anyone visit if they had school aged children, even if they didn't bring their children with them. They could be carrying germs and not know it. OH's family is also the kind to say "oh, nobody is sick" when they've got 2 kids with stuffy noses. My girls were born November 25 and their first outing to a family gathering was March 31. It caused a lot of tension because people thought we were being overprotective, but I'm not going to let my children get the flu and DIE because SIL or MIL wanted to play pass-the-baby.