our last resort.... CC Help!!!!

[mommyhav]

Hi all
my OH wanted to try CC so we are attempting as we speak....my question is this: to anyone who has used this method, what do you do if they wont lie down? my LO just stands up in her crib and wont lie down. i am about to go and check on her and i know she will be standing up in her crib, so do i just say go to sleep and not touch her etc? i just cant picture her lying down on her own....

she used to be a great sleeper, but lately i cant get her to settle at night at all. we are trying to get her into a routine but its not working yet. she jsut wants to move around all the time. she is always super lively at night and wont even hardly sit with me to have her milk at night. i just dont know what to do! she wiggles and worms around while i try to feed her and pays around. i am beginning to think that its time to wean her from the breast.

please tell me what worked for you especially if you have an extremely lively child......i am so upset! it is a lot less about my sleep and more about knowing that she needs to get to bed earlier and sleep through.

right now she is absolutely hysterical and my husband is doing the first check and she is just out of her mind and i think she is still standing in her crib.

i feel like such a bad mother

 

[Joyzerelly]

I'm not saying this is gospel but read this first. https://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/handout2.asp

 

[Kitty23]

Your not a bad mother at all! I do cc and it works well for us, I let them grumble and cry for 5 mins then go in shush them, pat them and pop their dummies back in. You could also try the Tracey Hogg pick up put down method, she stays in the room I think and when the baby is crying pick it and soothe it, then pop it down again, or with a toddler she lays them down again when they stand up xxx

 

[RJsMum]

My son has recently learned to pull himself to standing...so he sometimes tries to avoid sleep by standing. The only reason I don't lie him down again each time is because it will only irritate him and get him upset to the point where he will avoid sleep for longer.

The thing I have found that helps is that I will sit in the room, on a chair or on the floor, and I will let him stand and wear himself out chattering to his plushies. It usually takes less than 30 minutes before he is yawning his little head off and I can see he's truly tired. If he starts to cry a lot, more than just a whinge, then I will pick him up and rock him until he gets drowsy and then try to put him down again.

What is your bedtime routine like now? For example, 30 min before I want him down we do a bath, PJs and lotion, bedtime music while I read a story and nurse, and when I see he is just about to nod off, I take him off the breast and put him in his cot. But even the half-hour leading up to bathtime is quiet without much stimulation to allow his brain to wind down.

 

[Noodles]

My best advice is try and help her to understand the difference between nap time and bed time.

When she naps make sure that there are light on, or curtains are open, put some music on or the TV and make it noisy. That way hen she wakes up at night it will totally different to when she wakes up during the day.

Dylan is very lively and I've found that getting him into a routine was they key. It may take a week or so before it sticks in her head so you may be in for a few more late nights. But try having a bath with her, lots of skin to skin contact in a quiet bathroom, then dry her off in a quiet darkened room prehaps with either some rainforest sounds (Dylan loves them) or white noise or even some classical music.

Then once she is dressed for bed have a cuddle and tell her a story. At this age it could be any old crap. Prehaps just tell her about your day, or what you were like when you were little, anything really just as long as it's said in a soothing voice.

Then feed her and have a another cuddle (all in a quiet darkened room) and then place her down in the cot and give her a kiss. If she wont lie down, try just sitting next to the cot as she is prob standing up to get your attenion.

After this point avoid eye contact as that is what she is after. Just keep lying her down, saying 'sssssssssssssshhhhhhhh' and rub her tummy or pat her bum or whatever comforts her, but do not look her in the eye or pick her up.

I'm not saying that this will work straight away it may take days but she will realise that quiet time means sleep and gradually as she gets used to the idea you can spend less and less time sat by her cot and leave room just before she drops off to sleep until she eventually realises that the cot and darkeness means sleep and you will just be able to put her down, give her a kiss and leave the room.

It's a slow process but you won't have to leave her to cry and you will always be there for you if she needs you, but crying for attenion is a want and not a need and as long as you are there making her feel safe and secure she will calm down.

It's not a miracle cure but it has worked for me and it's worked everyone I know who has tried it.

Good luck!

 

[redpoppy]

Do you have a good sleep schedule? Because if your baby isn't sleeping at set times every day then I think CC can be a LOT more difficult.

I used to rock my baby to sleep day and night but her schedule was almost set. (give or take a 5 or 10 mins) and I worked quite hard at trying to keep it quite structured as she goes a little mad on no sleep.

Also, if she's going through a developmental spurt (learning new things either physically or mentally) which may be the case if she's learnt to stand up recently, then it may not be the best time too? Its also these stages where their sleep goes out the window.

The thing with CC is that the worst part lasts 3 days but you can have hiccups up to two weeks later apparently.

If you do NOT have a schedule when are you laying her down? Is it when she's quietened down and is genuinely sleepy?

Sorry for all the Qs. I know how hard sleep can be.

Also, and I do know how important sleep is as I have a little grump but some babies get by on very little sleep and cope very well.

Also, if you posted at half 5, what time did you put her to bed at night? Some babies are done my 5 (eep!). Although you can try a few things to change that.

Best of luck.

 

[twinklestar]

My best advice is try and help her to understand the difference between nap time and bed time.

When she naps make sure that there are light on, or curtains are open, put some music on or the TV and make it noisy. That way hen she wakes up at night it will totally different to when she wakes up during the day.

Dylan is very lively and I've found that getting him into a routine was they key. It may take a week or so before it sticks in her head so you may be in for a few more late nights. But try having a bath with her, lots of skin to skin contact in a quiet bathroom, then dry her off in a quiet darkened room prehaps with either some rainforest sounds (Dylan loves them) or white noise or even some classical music.

Then once she is dressed for bed have a cuddle and tell her a story. At this age it could be any old crap. Prehaps just tell her about your day, or what you were like when you were little, anything really just as long as it's said in a soothing voice.

Then feed her and have a another cuddle (all in a quiet darkened room) and then place her down in the cot and give her a kiss. If she wont lie down, try just sitting next to the cot as she is prob standing up to get your attenion.

After this point avoid eye contact as that is what she is after. Just keep lying her down, saying 'sssssssssssssshhhhhhhh' and rub her tummy or pat her bum or whatever comforts her, but do not look her in the eye or pick her up.

I'm not saying that this will work straight away it may take days but she will realise that quiet time means sleep and gradually as she gets used to the idea you can spend less and less time sat by her cot and leave room just before she drops off to sleep until she eventually realises that the cot and darkeness means sleep and you will just be able to put her down, give her a kiss and leave the room.

It's a slow process but you won't have to leave her to cry and you will always be there for you if she needs you, but crying for attenion is a want and not a need and as long as you are there making her feel safe and secure she will calm down.

It's not a miracle cure but it has worked for me and it's worked everyone I know who has tried it.

Good luck!

great advise, it really does work

 

[Noodles]

My best advice is try and help her to understand the difference between nap time and bed time.

When she naps make sure that there are light on, or curtains are open, put some music on or the TV and make it noisy. That way hen she wakes up at night it will totally different to when she wakes up during the day.

Dylan is very lively and I've found that getting him into a routine was they key. It may take a week or so before it sticks in her head so you may be in for a few more late nights. But try having a bath with her, lots of skin to skin contact in a quiet bathroom, then dry her off in a quiet darkened room prehaps with either some rainforest sounds (Dylan loves them) or white noise or even some classical music.

Then once she is dressed for bed have a cuddle and tell her a story. At this age it could be any old crap. Prehaps just tell her about your day, or what you were like when you were little, anything really just as long as it's said in a soothing voice.

Then feed her and have a another cuddle (all in a quiet darkened room) and then place her down in the cot and give her a kiss. If she wont lie down, try just sitting next to the cot as she is prob standing up to get your attenion.

After this point avoid eye contact as that is what she is after. Just keep lying her down, saying 'sssssssssssssshhhhhhhh' and rub her tummy or pat her bum or whatever comforts her, but do not look her in the eye or pick her up.

I'm not saying that this will work straight away it may take days but she will realise that quiet time means sleep and gradually as she gets used to the idea you can spend less and less time sat by her cot and leave room just before she drops off to sleep until she eventually realises that the cot and darkeness means sleep and you will just be able to put her down, give her a kiss and leave the room.

It's a slow process but you won't have to leave her to cry and you will always be there for you if she needs you, but crying for attenion is a want and not a need and as long as you are there making her feel safe and secure she will calm down.

It's not a miracle cure but it has worked for me and it's worked everyone I know who has tried it.

Good luck!

great advise, it really does work

Thank you!

 

[Sam9kids]

My best advice is try and help her to understand the difference between nap time and bed time.

When she naps make sure that there are light on, or curtains are open, put some music on or the TV and make it noisy. That way hen she wakes up at night it will totally different to when she wakes up during the day.

Dylan is very lively and I've found that getting him into a routine was they key. It may take a week or so before it sticks in her head so you may be in for a few more late nights. But try having a bath with her, lots of skin to skin contact in a quiet bathroom, then dry her off in a quiet darkened room prehaps with either some rainforest sounds (Dylan loves them) or white noise or even some classical music.

Then once she is dressed for bed have a cuddle and tell her a story. At this age it could be any old crap. Prehaps just tell her about your day, or what you were like when you were little, anything really just as long as it's said in a soothing voice.

Then feed her and have a another cuddle (all in a quiet darkened room) and then place her down in the cot and give her a kiss. If she wont lie down, try just sitting next to the cot as she is prob standing up to get your attenion.

After this point avoid eye contact as that is what she is after. Just keep lying her down, saying 'sssssssssssssshhhhhhhh' and rub her tummy or pat her bum or whatever comforts her, but do not look her in the eye or pick her up.

I'm not saying that this will work straight away it may take days but she will realise that quiet time means sleep and gradually as she gets used to the idea you can spend less and less time sat by her cot and leave room just before she drops off to sleep until she eventually realises that the cot and darkeness means sleep and you will just be able to put her down, give her a kiss and leave the room.

It's a slow process but you won't have to leave her to cry and you will always be there for you if she needs you, but crying for attenion is a want and not a need and as long as you are there making her feel safe and secure she will calm down.

It's not a miracle cure but it has worked for me and it's worked everyone I know who has tried it.

Good luck!

great advise, it really does work

Thank you!

Agree exactly the advise that i would give

 

[mommyhav]

What is your bedtime routine like now? For example, 30 min before I want him down we do a bath, PJs and lotion, bedtime music while I read a story and nurse, and when I see he is just about to nod off, I take him off the breast and put him in his cot. But even the half-hour leading up to bathtime is quiet without much stimulation to allow his brain to wind down.

ours is pretty similar, the only problem that we are facing lately is that I am in a kickboxing lcass that ends at 7 in the next town and so i am back jsut before 8 which tends to be a bit late for her. we are working on trying to get my husband home in time to start the routine as right now my parents usually have her and then we have to drive home in the middle of the routine a couple nights a week. as a younger baby she was fine with all of this, but lately she jsut cant handle it. she cries in the car all the way home.

we are trying to work on getting her to bed earlier as i think this is aprt of the problem.

as for those who mentioned that CC may be harmful to babies etc, I think we are ok because we did check in on her every 10-15 mins....it only took 25 mins for her to fall asleep so i think we did well. also, the crying lately extends into the rest of her day also....for example, she cried hysterically during a bath the other night, and she will cry hysterically at bedtime even if I am hiolding her and rocking or nursing her etc. its jsut tough right now and no one is getting enough sleep and last night it seemed to work ok!


my new questions/concerns:

1. she went to sleep with a wet diaper i found out when i changed her in the middle of the night as i could smell the pee. how do i get around this as she usually pees when she is awake......

2. she seems to be sick and when she woke up at 2am, i changed her and fed her and cuddled her cuz she could barely breath through her nose.....

does this mean i am back to square one?

 

[mommyhav]

Also, if you posted at half 5, what time did you put her to bed at night? Some babies are done my 5 (eep!). Although you can try a few things to change that.

Best of luck.

Pacific time over here it was around 9 cuz she has been sleeping late in the morning too so we are trying to change her routine. i would like her to be in bed by 8 or earlier so that she can get up to go to daycare when io get called in to work....

 

[RJsMum]

What is your bedtime routine like now? For example, 30 min before I want him down we do a bath, PJs and lotion, bedtime music while I read a story and nurse, and when I see he is just about to nod off, I take him off the breast and put him in his cot. But even the half-hour leading up to bathtime is quiet without much stimulation to allow his brain to wind down.

ours is pretty similar, the only problem that we are facing lately is that I am in a kickboxing lcass that ends at 7 in the next town and so i am back jsut before 8 which tends to be a bit late for her. we are working on trying to get my husband home in time to start the routine as right now my parents usually have her and then we have to drive home in the middle of the routine a couple nights a week. as a younger baby she was fine with all of this, but lately she jsut cant handle it. she cries in the car all the way home.

we are trying to work on getting her to bed earlier as i think this is aprt of the problem.

as for those who mentioned that CC may be harmful to babies etc, I think we are ok because we did check in on her every 10-15 mins....it only took 25 mins for her to fall asleep so i think we did well. also, the crying lately extends into the rest of her day also....for example, she cried hysterically during a bath the other night, and she will cry hysterically at bedtime even if I am hiolding her and rocking or nursing her etc. its jsut tough right now and no one is getting enough sleep and last night it seemed to work ok!


my new questions/concerns:

1. she went to sleep with a wet diaper i found out when i changed her in the middle of the night as i could smell the pee. how do i get around this as she usually pees when she is awake......

2. she seems to be sick and when she woke up at 2am, i changed her and fed her and cuddled her cuz she could barely breath through her nose.....

does this mean i am back to square one?

The only thing I can really speak to is my own experience...and that is, if she is teething or poorly...routines go out the window along with sleep. In which case...extra cuddles is all you can give.

At the end of the day, crying is a baby's only way to communicate since they can't tell you what's wrong. If she isn't able to self-soothe and she cries and gets fussy, it's because she likely IS tired, but is upset because she isn't able to get herself to sleep.

Has she hit any new milestones lately? I do know that makes them more wakeful in general as well.

 

[redpoppy]

Also, if you posted at half 5, what time did you put her to bed at night? Some babies are done my 5 (eep!). Although you can try a few things to change that.

Best of luck.

Pacific time over here it was around 9 cuz she has been sleeping late in the morning too so we are trying to change her routine. i would like her to be in bed by 8 or earlier so that she can get up to go to daycare when io get called in to work....

Apparently the majority of babies have natural internal clocks and they suggest sleep times of between 6 and 8 with wake times around the same times in the mornings.

It's a theory (scientific, I have no idea how effective it is) that babies who wake up too early could do with a shift of a much earlier sleep time, if not permanently then at least for half a week or so. I have no clue if it works. Always sounds scary to me.

 

[lanaross]

I haven't read all the replies so maybe a repeat but I also read that once those types of things start happening you just put them back down tell sleepytime-shhhh and walk away. No eye contact, smiles etc. You do the exact same thing two more times and then on the fourth time you don't say anything, just help them down. If they keep getting up, as somebody said let them wear themselves out. Just making it plain boring - no talking, no smiling, dark room, etc.

also PS I know you're super tired and super frustrated right now, but can I just say how lucky you are, it's so unbelievably cute (sorry couldn't help myself!!