partner doesnt want a child yet!

[thingschange1]

Im getting really frustrated and depressed at the fact everyone i know is either pregnant or now has a child. This annoys me because most of them have not been with their boyfriends very long and most of them did not even want children. None of these people work either and have all now been given a council flat ....which is the main reason y i think they had the kids. The thing is i really want a child but my partner thinks hes not ready, his reason is the maisonette we live in is cold...which it is not lol . The reason i want a child is i have wanted to always be a young mum but now i have been diagnosed with a condition which decreases my fertility rate more and more every year so if i was too wait a few years it is unlikely i can have children. I have 3 jobs and my partner has a full time job all of or jobs total about 2500 a month so our income is not poor. Please someone help~!!!!

 

[nadupoi]

Well you can never force it on anybody. You didn't happen to mention how old you were...? If you're under 18, Bnb doesn't support WTT or TTC.

If you're not. I'm sure there's still plenty of time. Have a talk with your partner and explain to him why you want to be a young mom and how your condition makes it more difficult. But even if he agrees, there are still lots of things needed to prepare for a baby and all that comes along with it. Just because everyone else is pregnant, doesn't mean you have to be. I know it's hard, hun, and I'm sure we all know how you feel. There is never an easy answer.

 

[thingschange1]

i think you were very rude in this last comment and yes i am old enough thank you i am 19 and i do not want a baby because 'everyone else has one' i was a child because i have always wanted to be a mother and i don't want my chance of being a mother to slip away. Also i have the cot and most of the child items already due to past circumstances.

 

[Amygdala]

First off: Welcome to ttc!

I know it can be a touchy subject for people being made to wait but I'm sure nadupoi didn't mean to be rude. Didn't sound rude to me either but if you took offence I'm sure that's not what she intended.

About your request for help: I'm afraid there won't be anything anyone can say to change your situation. There's two people neccessary for making a baby so you'll have to wait for your OH to be ready. But you can make it less frustrating I think, by talking to him about things (especially your fears about your fertility) and/or occupying yourself with something else until the time comes. I find bnb also helps to pass the time.

 

[Ashes]

First off I know how you feel. It's hard for some people to understand some things....and I completely agree with you on how frustrating it is. I'm married and 23 and all I've ever wanted was to be a mother. I started TTC when I was 19 also! Now that I'm older and when I was TTC ended badly of course I want a baby NOW. My hub is in the military and it's like EVERYONE is either pregnant OR has at least 3 kids! It's so hard on me bc I want to be a mom more than anything and its rough when the partner isn't on the same page. I told my hub I want to have a baby asap when I get my weight back up and he was like no! I was like uhh excuse me and he was like I don't want a kid for like 6 years. OMG I felt like my world ended. I did NOT sign up for waiting years to be a mommy. I want to be a young mom and its been so rough since he has been so hardheaded about this. He finally agreed that when I get healthy we can try....whats your name for future notice?...I like talking personal with names lol....but what I'm trying to say is I totally get you and understand! All I can do is hope and pray that he has a change of heart. Pray about it. Ask God to soften his heart. I'm here for you girl.

 

[Damita]

I'm so sorry to hear that *hugs* I wish I could give you some advice