Pinkification

[Piper84]

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/m...er-daughter-and-uses-blue-boy-diapers.html?fb

This is an interesting combination of a few ideas flying around at the moment regarding the pink thing. You've got the science kits and Monopoly games labelled "Boys" in places like Debenhams, Boots and Marks and Spencer and the pinks aisles labelled "Girls" and the whole princess phenomenon.

I wasn't as bothered by it before, but now we're expecting a girl, I am apprehensive at the world of toy marketing and children's clothing that awaits her.

I have to admit, I would like her to grow up with the same freedom I did to choose what toys to play with without being told what was for girls and what was for boys and - subtly - to just lower her expectations. Girls are here to play with cupcakes and dress up like princesses, not to play with chemistry sets or complicated board games.

What's your experience been like raising a girl in these bizarre times? How is it different to how you grew up toy-wise?

 

[pinklizzy]

We have tried to avoid too much pink with LO, although she's not really old enough yet to make distinctions herself about the 'gender' of the toys she plays with.
She loves her cars, diggers and tractors and has a little car garage as well as a doll's pushchair and crib, that is stuffed with a lot of pink clad dolls.
The other night I found her in bed (which has a pink, girly bedspread) cuddled up to a plastic dragon that she inherited from my 16 year old brother!
I do try to avoid the whole 'princess' phenomenon and any disney princess branded items are banned but I know it will change as she gets older and is more influenced by her peers and toy advertising etc. I want her to make choices that relate to what she actual likes and enjoys playing with, rather than feeling like she has to have it because it's girly.
When I was a child I loved dinosaurs and spent hours playing in 'swamps' in the back garden. I also had lots of matchbox cars and an awesome digger!

 

[Sarah lo]

I've always been very unisex with Olivia. She wears pink clothes sometimes then other times she's in blue or green. Toys wise she has dolls and a vacuum cleaner and she also has cars and dinosaurs. When we decorated her nursery we did it green and yellow with jungle animals and when everyone said its not girly enough I said who cares? If it was my room I'd want jungle animals! And it turns out Olivia loves her animal wallpaper

Nothing is off limits for us. If she wants to paint her room pink and dress up like s fairy when she's older I will encourage her. If she wants to dress up like a pirate and paint her room blue I will encourage her.

The toy shop can label their toys however they want, it won't make a difference to me. I will never tell her she can't have something because its a boy's toy.

I must admit I do find the pinkification thing a bit annoying though, just that it is so boring. When Olivia was a baby, all the nursery equipment for girls was pink pink pink and the boys stuff was every other colour so I did used to deliberately avoid the pink stuff then just because I didn't want her to get bored of looking at the same colour day in day out at a time in her life when bright colours were so stimulating.

 

[steph.]

I think its more down to the parents than to store labelling. This "pinkification" doesnt bother me and I wont let it bother my daughter. I remember my favourite toy shop as a kid and it was separated into boys and girls (I think most are, its just a way of organising things) but I would always browse through both sections. Sometimes I would chose a barbie and sometimes a skate board.

I dont deliberately avoid pink, if something is cute and its pink I'll buy it. If its cute and blue I will also buy it. I think maybe by avoiding pink completely like the woman in the article, you just draw more importance to colours.

 

[Piper84]

I agree that avoiding it is a problem, because the child will want to rebel at some point.

I don't think separating toy shops into boys' and girls' sections is helpful or intuitive at all. Where do board games go? What about bricks, soft toys and paints? Someone recently made the point that you don't label DIY sections in shops "men" and cleaning supplies "women", so why is it OK for kids?

I also agree that it's boring and limiting, but I think some shops are getting the picture. Hamleys got rid of their boy and girl sections and others have followed suit.

What makes the pink thing worse is it's used by people like Playboy and Katie Price, who are (inadvertently or not) sexualising the colour pink for children

https://db2.stb.s-msn.com/i/7D/F83E75FF759FC2DB72A7EE9BE3ACC.jpg

 

[pinklightbulb]

I'm raising boys and it's shocking how much pink there is vs blue. If toys were more unisex, I could buy more for my sons to play with.

 

[special_kala]

Its easy to look too much into this i think.

Completely hiding pink is just the same issue at the other end of the extreme no?

I buy what me and the girls like, sometimes its pink, sometimes its yellow/blue/green/.

 

[Piper84]

I don't think it's looking too much into stuff when girls seem to be being systematically told indirectly to lower their expectations. Pinkification for me isn't just about the colour, which is so exaggerated in today's market, it's also about the toy and clothes industry telling girls from a young age what they should be playing with and wearing (and boys too for that matter, although they have far, far more choice).

That, for me, is pretty worrying, especially when what they're being told to play with is usually unstimulating and encourages subservience (cook, clean and look after babies but heaven forbid you take an interest in science) and what they're being told to wear is stuff that exaggerates passiveness and premature sexuality. I can't believe it every time I see t-shirts with stuff like "Bitch in training", bodies with boob tassels printed on them and tracksuit bottoms with Playboy bunnies or "Princess" on the seat. I think it's sick.

I caught this recently and thought it was great:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHICz5MYxNQ

 

[zanDark]

Thankfully stores aren't separated like that here, I don't see a need for it at all! Same way I don't see the need for a girl specific lego line

I'm all for pink and frilly, but my daughter will also learn to ride a motorbike with her dad when she's old enough and can have proper riding gear, as well as build lego technics! My husband needs to be able to have something exclusive between them, and it doesn't have to be girly just because LO is a girl!

 

[emyandpotato]

That article was basically my childhood. I don't think it changed who I was though; I still desperately wanted the girly dresses and dolls and makeup I just was too embarrassed to ask for it. I did enjoy my neutral and boys toys too of course, and I would spend loads of time doing DIY kids kits like making candles and sciencey things, and I grew up very creative so maybe that's an effect?!

I don't think it's right though necessarily. It's a shame that things are so gender stereotyped for children, it does them no good, but it's basically impossible to shield them from things so I think it's only fair to offer both 'boy's' and 'girl's' things in equal amounts and let them make their own preferences, as well as allowing them to choose what they wear and not stereotyping them with gender/sexual orientation ideals at all.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Its easy to look too much into this i think.

Completely hiding pink is just the same issue at the other end of the extreme no?

I buy what me and the girls like, sometimes its pink, sometimes its yellow/blue/green/.

Totally agree. I think people get caught up in this far to much. To me, it is JUST a colour. My daughter wss obsessed with pink when she was 3, princess, fairys etc. Now she's 7 and all of her own accord she grew out if it. She loves animal's now and her favourite colour is purple.
I have a baby girl and I prefer patterns and rainbows on her to baby pink but that's just because of her colouring. I do try and buy bright toys for her but that's because they are more appealing yo the eye.
Shops do sell lots of pink but I don't think it bothers me.

 

[Piper84]

Its easy to look too much into this i think.

Completely hiding pink is just the same issue at the other end of the extreme no?

I buy what me and the girls like, sometimes its pink, sometimes its yellow/blue/green/.

Totally agree. I think people get caught up in this far to much. To me, it is JUST a colour. My daughter wss obsessed with pink when she was 3, princess, fairys etc. Now she's 7 and all of her own accord she grew out if it. She loves animal's now and her favourite colour is purple.
I have a baby girl and I prefer patterns and rainbows on her to baby pink but that's just because of her colouring. I do try and buy bright toys for her but that's because they are more appealing yo the eye.
Shops do sell lots of pink but I don't think it bothers me.

That's encouraging that she isn't affected by it too much, but if you read the article "pinkification" is not just about the colour, it's the segregation of toys for boys and girls limiting imagination and the expectation that every girl wants to be a princess.

 

[Dragonfly]

Pink its just a colour to me. My boys like pink, they have pink toys and clothing. Others find this is weird when they choose pink things like a pencil or straw. I dont understand that. William said his favourite colour was pink one day and my mum went in to shock and insinuated he was weird. She dosnt think its right he wants a play house either. Toys are toys. Adults create the stigma. My boys love boys stuff too, anything with wheels, tractors, diggers but would say they like a doll too and tea sets, kitchens they have, washing machines and tumble dryers. I am currently looking for pink hello kitty wellies for Alex as he always takes them off my friends girl when she come down and wont part with them.

I think boys playing with "girls" as they call it stuff is a good things and like wise, I played with my boys toys as a child but my mum wouldn't let him play with girls stuff and it shows with him. I think some role playing in a kitchen could have done him some good as he was raised to believe woman do all the house work, cooking and cleaning and will not do them things and thinks its strange for my kids to have such toys.

Also if I had a girl I wouldnt pink over load, I dont even blue over load with the boys. Its annoying shopping for either sex.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Oh I do agree about expectations lol everyone assumes Ruby wants pink yet she would be more likely to chose another colour. Yesterday at bear factory party all the girls git a pink bear but she wanted white. The lady looked at her like she was mad! Then she took the bow off and dressed it like spongebob ha ha.

 

[summer rain]

I don't like it. I also don't like how lego has 'lego city' for boys and for girls it is like bimbo pool party. When I was little there was only one lego and duplo and it was unisex. xx

 

[Tiff]

To me pink is just a colour. If she wants to wear it, great. If not, that's fine too.

I feel the bigger issue are the slogans on t shirts etc, I don't want my daughter wearing "future drama queen" on her shirt or "txt me" on the bum of her pants. Thankfully I work in a kid's clothing store that very much keeps kids, kids on both aspects (boys and girls) so I can get good deals on them.

The toy stuff bothers me too, for the same reasons as Summer Rain pointed out. We never bought the "girl" version of toys, always the primary colour ones. I also am probably going to get thrown under the bus, but we've really avoided Disney Princess with her as well.

Of course I know that they're just fairytales etc, but I really dislike how its always the princess needing to be saved in a matter of speaking. With Claire's autism she's VERY literal in how she processes things and I just don't want that mindset for her.

Of course I don't shun Disney altogether, just the "princesses". It could be mountains out of molehills but for our family we just don't do it. Doesn't mean a thing against anyone who has a princess-crazy kiddo of course.

 

[leelee]

Its easy to look too much into this i think.

Completely hiding pink is just the same issue at the other end of the extreme no?

I buy what me and the girls like, sometimes its pink, sometimes its yellow/blue/green/.

Exactly what Kala says

 

[Piper84]

I don't like it. I also don't like how lego has 'lego city' for boys and for girls it is like bimbo pool party. When I was little there was only one lego and duplo and it was unisex. xx

I've really gone off Lego for this reason. Take a look at this comparison of their advertising from the 80s and now:

https://images.canberratimes.com.au/2012/03/06/3102244/1623105-420x0.jpg

Duplo for girls 2-5:

https://en.bricker.ru/images/sets/6785_brickset.jpg

 

[kerrie24]

I don't have issues with this,my kids have all had free reign of which toys they want and I don't care if they are pink/blue/luminous yellow,they are just toys.Everything has to be labelled these days.

 

[Dragonfly]

Theres a row on my facebook status about this at the moment and apparently someone has said "pink makes boys wink". sigh.

Guess I wont have to worry about future daughter in laws over that pink t shirt my son has . Who would have known it was so easy to create a gay person . Makes you think what other colours are magical.