Klandagi
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2009
- Messages
- 1,033
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Peeing in your sleep. What the san Hell on toast is this?!?!?! I wake up AT LEAST once every other night CONVINCED my water has broken because I've leaked pee in my sleep. This is VERY disconcerting since I usually sleep with either body pillow or OH's legs between mine... Not amusing. Quite embarrassing. I'm running out of laundry detergent at warp speed!
HAIR! I have a BEARD! if I don't constantly pluck/tweeze/shave at it I wind up looking like Grimli from LOTR. Not a good look. And how about that luxurious golden fleecey butt fluff I have going on! WHY?! It's FLUFFY! GO AWAY FLUFFY!
Itchy... Itchy itchy itchy lady bits and not an infection in sight!
Owie... Owie owie owie lady bits and so swollen I wanna cry!!!!
It's IMPOSSIBLE to get up easily at all. It's a complete act of God that I'm able to pull myself up off the floor or chair or out of bed.
Sex? Hubby wants me on top. He's funny. I can't even begin to think about getting on top when I feel like a three legged lame land locked Hippo! There's NOTHING graceful about this body right now. At all. Riding him is about as possible as me magically becoming a Victoria's Secret Model pregnant and all.
Swollen feet? Oh yes. They're swollen. So are my ankles. I can't fit my feet into normal shoes anymore and my ankles refuse to flex which makes my walk from office to car or car to grocery store etc etc look like a scene out of March of the Penguins! We won't even go into what it's like to try and jog and I DO have to jog with show horses. Only ONE more show until I pop though!!! BUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
HAIR! I have a BEARD! if I don't constantly pluck/tweeze/shave at it I wind up looking like Grimli from LOTR. Not a good look. And how about that luxurious golden fleecey butt fluff I have going on! WHY?! It's FLUFFY! GO AWAY FLUFFY!
Itchy... Itchy itchy itchy lady bits and not an infection in sight!
Owie... Owie owie owie lady bits and so swollen I wanna cry!!!!
It's IMPOSSIBLE to get up easily at all. It's a complete act of God that I'm able to pull myself up off the floor or chair or out of bed.
Sex? Hubby wants me on top. He's funny. I can't even begin to think about getting on top when I feel like a three legged lame land locked Hippo! There's NOTHING graceful about this body right now. At all. Riding him is about as possible as me magically becoming a Victoria's Secret Model pregnant and all.
Swollen feet? Oh yes. They're swollen. So are my ankles. I can't fit my feet into normal shoes anymore and my ankles refuse to flex which makes my walk from office to car or car to grocery store etc etc look like a scene out of March of the Penguins! We won't even go into what it's like to try and jog and I DO have to jog with show horses. Only ONE more show until I pop though!!! BUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
