rant about FOB and weed.

[dudettex]

Me and fob use to be big weed smokers. But ever since I found out about briella I quit it all and i'm trying to stay away from it as much as I can. But it's sooo hard since fob keeps smoking all the time. I just moved with him and we live 2 hours away from my parents, i don't know a soul here and it's such a small place and everyone just hates everyone and they are all pretty much crack whores who just do drugs cause they have nothing better to do with their lives and talk bad about others constantly. It's so hard for me to adjust since I moved to new brunswick from quebec 1 year ago and now I'm moving to a different province again and lost all my family and few friends I had. And fob been trying to slow down on weed but he like does it everyday still and buys some behind my back.. Right when he runs out of it he goes and buys some and doesn't tell me about it and we're so tight on money. When I have money he tells me to buy things that we need right now, i want to buy some baby things he tells me to get things for the house and stuff. So weed is more important than baby things? Just now he told me he was going out to do a few things and idunno I knew he was hiding something. I went through his facebook messages and he was asking his friend if he could buy 20$ off him. I texted him saying enjoy your weed and he calls me a dick? It throws me off so much.. I'm doing all this change and trying to do my best and everything for him and Baby and it's not enough for him to stop doing all this? I just don't know..... I dunno what to do it's too much for me.. Advice please would be greatly appreciated I'm so tired of fighting with him..

 

[LarLar]

I honestly don't know what to suggest, if you've tried talking to him and it hasn't worked then chances are talking to him again won't work.

I'd let him know all the sacrifices you've made for your lil girl and him and make him aware of the fact you don't appreciate being called a dick when he's the one lying to you. Other than making him really aware of the fact you're disappointed in him theres nothing else you can do.. unless you'd be willing to take drastic action which i assume you won't as you've moved ect for him.

I really hope things get better for you and that he quits before your LO arrives. xx

 

[dudettex]

honestly we've been together for about 4 months and we fought a lot about this and i have talked to him about what I've been doing and he keeps saying I'll stop blablabla.. But yeah here we are. He keeps calling me an a$$..... whatever At this point I think it's best I just leave it still really hurts we can't do this together for her but I can't keep getting disrespected and lied to ...

 

[MarissaFaith]

Before we found out I was pregnant my OH smoked pot, and I would to occasionally with him - but I didn't like to as much as him! So after we found out I was pregnant I stopped completely (and cried my eyes out for weeks because I did it twice before I knew I was pregnant ) But I let my OH keep doing it in hopes that he would realize 30$ every couple weeks on pot is expensive.. ironically the second time he bought pot while I was pregnant he got a bad bag - it was laced with something and he freaked out so bad he wont even go near it anymore!! You could always hope for that to happen

Or - you could try to talk to him? Tell him that since money is tight, yet he still has the money to buy pot that you deserve to buy baby things! If he gets 20$ a week for a bag, you get 20$ a week for whatever you want! .... You could always say you'll leave him if he doesn't stop too?

Good Luck - Sorry I didn't have much advise!

 

[amygwen]

I was the same as you. My OH and I throughout our last year of high school smoked weed EVERY SINGLE DAY. I got pregnant in 2008 but had a m/c but it sometimes wanders through my head if maybe I m/c because I smoked weed (when I didn't know I was pregnant). It made me feel really guilty and I stopped completed but my OH continued. I got pregnant again in 2009 with my LO and of course I wasn't smoking weed but my OH was. Honestly, nothing irritated me more that he continued to smoke weed while we were trying to save to get our own place or to save to get baby things. Even if he only did it once a week, he wasted money on weed and it really irritated me.

Even now I know he still smokes weed. I've said to him as long as it doesn't effect our money (now we live together and pay bills) and as long as he doesn't do it around me or LO, I don't mind, but I still sort of do. It's really difficult to know he's going out and getting dumb with his friends while I'm taking care of his child. Even if it's only $20 a week, it's a lot when you're living paycheck to paycheck. Anyways, I'm not much help but I know what you're going through. Sadly, all I've done is talk to him and talk to him over and over again and nothing seems to work. He has drastically changed since high school though and only does it a few times a month now our LO is here. He knows if he goes and does it and I know about it, I will make him feel like shit by guilt tripping.

 

[MUM0FTW0]

Didnt want to read and run,but sorry youre going through this....experienced this with my first sons biological father...and I know its hard. So once again,sorry for your troubles

 

[taybaby925]

Honestly, I use to smoke all the time with my OH.
And he still does it, and it doesn't bother me. Just because I had to stop,
doens't mean he has too. He goes outside when he does it, so he's never in the house.

But I do understand what you're going through
and if you're short on money, than I understand even more.
I hope everything works out for you.

 

[JadeBaby75]

I use to smoke all the time, stopped when I was pregnant, and started again this month! I get that you are aggravated but I think its hard for him stop stop smoking when he doesn't necessarily have to. I know if I didn't get pregnant I would have continued to smoke myself into oblivion. Maybe that's where his mindset is at!

Its the money situation that would pist me off more than anything, its ok to blow if you have the funds but your child should NOT be going without anything to fund this habit!

 

[Linzi_x]

Didn't want to R&R, I'm sorry that you have to go through this, I don't know anything about drugs but if you've already talked to him then chances are he won't listen if you try talking to him again. Let him know how angry you are though because as you said, you've made sacrifices and you're doing really well so why can't he? He has to focus on you and the baby and he has to see that.

 

[dudettex]

thanks girls we talked about it last night and it really did not go well i was about to leave and had everything packed and it kinda got physical too ew fought all night and his parents kinda got involved they're trying to get him to quit too i know it's not a big deal to much people but my parents would take custody away from me if I let my daughter around it or anyone who does it and I kindof understand because drugs are drugs and it messes kids up when they're around that growing up and I just want the best for her i don't want her turning into thatbecause once you're in it all that you want is that and you just don't wanna do much else. He promised he'd stop but he's said that before I told him if he makes one slip i'm out. So we'll see what happens !