Really dont know what to do?

[FjMum]

Hi guys,

Ive had just signed up to here for a little help and advise on things.
When i was with the babys dad, we seemed to get on just fine. Since i found out i was pregnant then he ended it and said he still wants to be there for the baby. we have known now since may and i havent seen him since then. He randomly texts me - sometimes hes nice and sometimes he awful. He said he does want to be in the babys life but never ever makes time for the appointments or scans. He would rather be out with his friends partying! I have tried so hard to get him involved because i really want hm to be there but i cant make him. I just dont know what to do

Sorry about the big moan.

xxx

 

[Frooty]

Just tell him if he wants to be there for the baby start acting like it being there starts by being at scans and appointments not when it suits him be strong n firm with them if not they take the biscuit hun xx

 

[Mally01]

I'm sorry for how you are feeling, I'm in the same boat and it's not nice. I think it's best with men like this to tell them once about scans / appointments etc, and not push the subject and then leave it at that. No matter how hurtful, spiteful or incomprehensible we think it is to abandon a child or not be bothered by its birth, we can't make someone else have the same values as us on this subject. It's harsh but true. You must give a man what he wants in a situation like this and let him lie in his own bed, so to speak. Pushing him will only send him running further. Best to break ties, don't contact him unless you need to and let him come to you if he wants to. If he wants to be involved in the babys life he will. If he doesn't, there is nothing you can do about that sweetie, sorry.

 

[Laura2919]

Sounds like he needs a good kick up the bum and he needs to see whats really in front of him. I assume your still pregnant and yet to give birth. Maybe to him its not real until there is a baby here on this earth, if that makes sense.

 

[cluelessnow]

Sorry for what you're going through It's a sh!tty situation. I know it hurts a lot but all you can do is provide the dates and info and it's up to him to make it happen. There's not much you can do.