Restraining order???

[Lyssa]

I was suggested to come post on the single parents thread by many lovely girls in the second trimester forum.
Im hoping with the support we can get through this together
Today i met with the sperm donor in my park across my house. We already have a 2 year old daughter together and i am 19+ weeks pregnant with his child again. I simply asked him what he planned on doing as far as helping out when the baby gets here. He got all mad blamed the pregnancy on me and started walking away. He didnt even say goodbye to our daughter he just turned and walked away from us. I yelled out thats nice to know you have no respect even for your beautiful daughter. He got mad walked up towards me smacked me with a water bottle and poured the water all over me in front of my daughter. Then he threatened me not to come outside at night.
Im scared because he has put his hands on me before and im debating to put a restraining order on him. Im just scared if the police arrest him, hell come back even more angry and try to hurt me, the baby, or my daughter.
Has anyone ever experienced putting a restraining order on their ex?
I dont know what the right thing to do is..

 

[Suz]

Hun. If he is and has hurt you, you need to go to the police.... If your afraid you need to go to the police. I know its easier said than done, but you need to not worry about the what if's. That is why the Assholes get away with it..... So please go to the police and take care of yourself and your daughters....

PM me if you need to talk.

 

[brownhairedmom]

You need to get the restraining order. If he does anything when he's under the order he'll go to jail, plain and simple. You can't live your life in fear. That is what restraining orders are for!!

I'm sorry he's being such an idiot, I will never understand some people

 

[Younglutonmum]

OMG thats awful!!

Please please go to the Police A.S.A.P!!

U def need a restraining order!!

 

[Donna79x]

What a horrible man!!! Get to the police hun and go through the restraining order process... as above, if he breaks the rules he will do the time!!! You dont need this worry x

 

[nikky0907]

Oh my god! Definitely get a restraining order!

You need to protect yourself from him and protect your children from witnessing such scenes!

 

[cuddles314]

Please please please go to the police and report this. Also contact a women's aid service for advice. Don't run the risk anymore of this horrible excuse for a man hurting you, or your precious babies. Stay safe sweetheart.
xx

 

[seosage]

I would say a restraining order is for if someone is stalking you rather than if someone is being physically violent - having said that - the threat about not going out at night fits. I went through it once - they were very nice at the police station and very understanding - then they basically went round his house and warned him off making contact in any way except via a solicitor - and said if I complained about him again they'd arrest him - I think that's sort of the first step - he doesn't get arrested or a criminal record - just warned off... Mind you - I live in the UK so it's probably different here.

 

[Sarahkka]

Lyssa -
You can already charge him with assault just for what he did to you in the park. Pressing charges sometimes gives the police more to work with to help you. Go talk to them and ask advice.
It sounds like you'd be doing everyone a favour getting that thug off the streets. Stay strong!

 

[Lyssa]

Sorry i havent written back.. thank you for all your words of encouragement.
I did notify authorities however i decided not to press charges and let him be warned.
Its really scary when someone you trusted turns their back on you and wishes you harm of any sort. Sometimes when i see him I cant believe he was the one i was in love with. Its like he is a stranger now

 

[sweetsammi]

Hugs..Huni If i were u i would definatelly do something, because his behaviour is totally unacceptable. If he has hurt you in the past, whos to say he wont do it again? And worse still your babies? It not healthy for you having to deal with this kind of stress and worry whilst pregnant luv and certainly not healthy for you little girl to witness. What an arsehole-to put it politly. If he is throwing them kind of threats at u and in front of ur daughter too you need to take some serious action..maybe start my getting some legal advice and go from there. Truely feel for you and your babies hun, good luck and i am so sorry you are having to go through this. Stay strong.xx

 

[krissi]

Hey hun sorry to hear this happened to you. I was a domestic abuse worker for 5 years in the UK so will just pass on what i know from my experiences here.

You definately need to go to the police and report what happened, it is also worth keeping a diary to keep track of any texts or messages you get.

The restraining order... not sure how it works out there but here its very unlikely that a judge would enforce a restraining order with the power of arrest for an isolated incident (unless you discuss with a family law solicitor other episodes of abuse).

Don't live in fear, he is an arse for treating you like this and i am sure you do not want him to be a part of your lives so stay the hell away from him its his loss and like i say get some support from your health visitor/ midwife/ local domestic abuse centre xxx