Scared about labor

[Skywalker]

Hi girls

I'm a scaredy cat about labor. Many ladies have lovingly told me HORROR stories either to make themselves look really tough or for the same reason people like to tell really scary stories to children right before they go to bed on a camping trip

I've consulted tons of women, my mom, my midwife group, my doula, my sister, Youtube, books, etc. Knowledge helps to temporarily chill me out, but invariably I get freaked out at every little twinge and sensation late at night. During the day I don't feel so scared and I feel like I could do it, but I live alone and I just get a bit panicked at the thought of it at night.

Anyone have any consoling words for a first time mom?

Also, I should mention, for as much apprehension as I have about labor, I actually have an incredibly high pain tolerance.

 

[wamommy]

I hate to say it, but this is #4 for me and I'm nervous, too! I think it's nornal, and ok to be nervous.

That said, you can do this! Just think, after the last few uncomfortable weeks, labor is the last step to meeting your LO! It's hard, it's painful, it can be scary, but it is absolutely, without question, THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD! Well, the birth is anyhow. It's worth the pain and worth the nervousness.

 

[sun]

I'm on my third and I think I'm more nervous this time. With my first I just winged it since I had no idea what to expect. With my second I was all pumped for it. But this time around I'm not looking forward to it at all lol. I'm in somewhat early labour now and very achy and crampy, so it's starting to make me dread full on labour.

But I found the best thing (for me) is to walk as much as possible during labour, visualize your body relaxing and opening with each contraction, and to not worry about things like "will the pain get worse, how long will it last, etc etc). Way easier said than done, but taking each contraction as it comes is the best way. No one is in labour forever and the moment your LO is in your arms everything is completely worth it. xo

 

[xdxxtx]

I was so scared for labor with my first pregnancy that I just vowed not even to think about it. I refused to read about it or talk about it. Yeah, people tried to tell me horror stories, but I just didn't listen, ignored 'em, thought about something else. I put my mind elsewhere. And, when it came to labor, all that practice I got "putting my mind elsewhere" did the trick. It didn't hurt much. It felt interesting, that's for sure, but it wasn't painful like I thought I'd be. Throughout labor and delivery with both of my children, with mild numbing with my first and NO numbing with my second, I joked and laughed and had a good time. I didn't cry or scream or shout obscenities... I smiled and laughed and rejoiced in such an exciting time. I'm VERY excited for labor and delivery again. Is that strange? I think it's an amazing process, and I love every minute of it.

And I think that the moment my baby was born each time, I completely forgot about what had been going on. This rush of hormones and emotions just entered my mind, and I was just wild about my baby and how perfect that baby was.

I KNOW you'll be okay. And, maybe you'll be crazy like me and actually enjoy it! But in reality, if it was so bad, most people would only have one child, but we just keep coming back for more.

 

[sun]

I was so scared for labor with my first pregnancy that I just vowed not even to think about it. I refused to read about it or talk about it. Yeah, people tried to tell me horror stories, but I just didn't listen, ignored 'em, thought about something else. I put my mind elsewhere. And, when it came to labor, all that practice I got "putting my mind elsewhere" did the trick. It didn't hurt much. It felt interesting, that's for sure, but it wasn't painful like I thought I'd be. Throughout labor and delivery with both of my children, with mild numbing with my first and NO numbing with my second, I joked and laughed and had a good time. I didn't cry or scream or shout obscenities... I smiled and laughed and rejoiced in such an exciting time. I'm VERY excited for labor and delivery again. Is that strange? I think it's an amazing process, and I love every minute of it.

And I think that the moment my baby was born each time, I completely forgot about what had been going on. This rush of hormones and emotions just entered my mind, and I was just wild about my baby and how perfect that baby was.

I KNOW you'll be okay. And, maybe you'll be crazy like me and actually enjoy it! But in reality, if it was so bad, most people would only have one child, but we just keep coming back for more.

LOL That would be nice! Both my previous births have been drug-free and I definitely wouldn't say I joked and laughed and had a good time! But it's true that once the baby is born everything melts away and it's just you and LO. But it is an amazing experience. I always feel like a superhero after!

 

[wamommy]

I was so scared for labor with my first pregnancy that I just vowed not even to think about it. I refused to read about it or talk about it. Yeah, people tried to tell me horror stories, but I just didn't listen, ignored 'em, thought about something else. I put my mind elsewhere. And, when it came to labor, all that practice I got "putting my mind elsewhere" did the trick. It didn't hurt much. It felt interesting, that's for sure, but it wasn't painful like I thought I'd be. Throughout labor and delivery with both of my children, with mild numbing with my first and NO numbing with my second, I joked and laughed and had a good time. I didn't cry or scream or shout obscenities... I smiled and laughed and rejoiced in such an exciting time. I'm VERY excited for labor and delivery again. Is that strange? I think it's an amazing process, and I love every minute of it.

And I think that the moment my baby was born each time, I completely forgot about what had been going on. This rush of hormones and emotions just entered my mind, and I was just wild about my baby and how perfect that baby was.

I KNOW you'll be okay. And, maybe you'll be crazy like me and actually enjoy it! But in reality, if it was so bad, most people would only have one child, but we just keep coming back for more.

LOL That would be nice! Both my previous births have been drug-free and I definitely wouldn't say I joked and laughed and had a good time! But it's true that once the baby is born everything melts away and it's just you and LO. But it is an amazing experience. I always feel like a superhero after!

Yes! There's a natural high that comes right after birth that is like nothing else. My births were completely unmedicated too though, and I would have to say that the smiling and laughing came AFTER the baby was out, lol.

 

[Rel]

From your post, I get the feeling that you are more worried about giving birth/labour at night, so here is something that may help you with that, I hope. I have heard that a lot of women are in labour through night because our bodies are more relaxed and in rest mode, so we are sort of numb and it makes it less painfull. I have no idea whether this is true, but I suppose it could be. Don't listen to the horror stories, some stuff can also sound worse than it actually was! I've been there twice and I have no idea what is going to happen this time, but I try to plan for different options, but we are all just as clueless even though we've been there already!