Scared of being infertile?

[Megastar848]

I am 29 and my husband and I haven't officially TTC. We're in the - not trying but if we mess up the timing and it does happen it would be great. That being said, I am terrified of being infertile. I've had a gut feeling that I might have problems for most of my 20s...not really based on anything. I have regular periods - average cycle is 25 days. I have ovulation pain and regular CM during ovulation. I don't have evidence of any other hormone issues - I don't think. Other than a little stubborn acne that I could probably take better care of, I don't see any other red flags.

But I am obsessed with reading through blogs and infertility articles to figure out if there is any sign I might be infertile. It is just so heartbreaking to read some of the stories out there. And a friend of mine just had a baby after trying for 7 years. I'm about to get AF any minute but for the last 5 days my boobs have been abnormally sore and I didn't get the regular cramps I get. So I've wasted 3 days of my life searching early pregnancy symptoms and spent too much on pregnancy tests only to have them turn out negative - which shouldn't be a surprise because there is only a low probability I'm pregnant. I don't think I could go through this every month for a year only to discover something is wrong and then go through tests and hormones and do the 2 week wait every month.

I have so much admiration for women who manage a life and ttc because if the last 3 days are any indication - I will not be able to keep my job and maintain a life while thinking about ttc!! How do you not go crazy??

Anyway - I don't think any doc would do a test on me because of my age and without us trying for at least a year. Which I get - but is anyone else freaked out about this? What do you look for? Or do you just try for a year hoping? My concern is that my age is somewhat borderline -- if I wait a year I'll be into 30 and if you read some of the articles out there...my eggs are going to start jumping ship and dying off on my 30th birthday!

 

[lucy_smith]

I totally get what you mean!
I'm currently 22 and many wont think that's old but I've been told I have endometriosis and my family also seem to go through menopause earlier than average. I'm also worried that I may be infertile. Many because we have used the withdrawal method for 4 years and the last 2 years we have been a little lazy with it now and again and its never come to anything. if we ended up pregnant we would be happy but if we wait a little while we will hopefully be in a better situation of owning a home.

But about being infertile, I have had a couple of 'scares' which we would of been happy if if came to a baby but unfortunately it did t, and i symptom spotted constantly too ! i dont know what im going to be like when we actually ttc!!

I have discussed infertility with bf before who instantly said we would adopt if we could t have our own. Without any questions he knew instantly this is how he would deal with it. I think the conversation we had has helped keep my mind at ease a little

 

[myangel167]

being infertile has crossed my mind before too. Only in the last year or so though. its a scary thought, which i have no reason to really be concerned with it at this point in my life, but yeah, ive still wondered about it.

 

[RandaPanda]

Ya, I think it's totally normal to think about this, and have the occasional worry. Even though I don't have any evidence at this point to support the idea that I could have fertility issues, I've had periods of my life where I have thought about it, and how I would deal with it if it ended up being an issue for me.

I think it's normal for us to put ourselves in "what if" situations like this - after all, we do it with nearly every other aspect of TTC and pregnancy (what if I can't breastfeed, I have twins, I'm a "bad" parent, I need a c-section...the list goes on!), so it makes perfect sense to have worries about something that could be so serious.

And yes, I TOTALLY get what you mean about TTC consuming your life! I'm struggling to keep my mind off of it at the moment. It's our first cycle TTC #1 and I'm approaching ovulation, so I'm excited, nervous, etc...And I'm nearly 33, so it crosses my mind that, if I do end up having trouble TTC, I may have waited too long. I think it's just important to focus on the positive as much as you can - being mentally positive leads to being more physically well, and that can only help with TTC

 

[tverb84]

I'm the same age as you and sometimes worry about being infertile whenever it's my time to have children. I think there's a test where you can see how many eggs you have.It's called ovary reserve.

 

[QuintinsMommy]

I think its pretty normal to worry about this, I have a child already and I worry, I keep thinking maybe I just got lucky the first time around,

 

[apreslaube]

Wow, I am scared of this too! I used to have debilitating ovulation pains. It would last a few days. It felt like a really hard snap and then kind of "sizzled" outward. My knees would crumble every time. I stopped having them about... maybe 6 months ago or so? I used to have CM too, but I don't have that anymore either. What if I WAS fertile and the pain was a bigger problem than my obgyn said and now I'm infertile? I guess it wouldn't be that big of a deal, since we'd just adopt all our kids instead of just the ones after "having" the first.

 

[stripeycat5]

I felt like this before I got pregnant with lo. You worry about everything that could go wrong. I think this is normal tbh. I was obsessed with looking at forums, doing preg tests even though we had only just started trying and I had finished my pill halfway through the packet! I think hormones have a huge part to play and when we switch into baby mode every waking thought is spent on baby making! If you have regular cycles and cm then you are halfway there so try not to worry to much I am sure once you start trying a little bean will be on its way very soon ;-)

 

[Pearls18]

This is such a common feeling you're not alone, the media and this forum has a lot of stories of women struggling which is great for raising awareness but they are the minority I can't remember the stats but most people fall within a year, I'm sure stats are scewed though and it is actually usually quicker. It's because it's something you want so much and hearing about struggles it's a natural fear. I had no reason to fear it but I did, I knew I would find it devastating, other than mine and DH's health I knew not being able to have children would be the worst thing for me to deal with so it's no wonder we fear "what if". I ended up falling first cycles with both boys. My SIL, again no reason, is petrified of not being able to fall. You're not alone, but try not to let it stress you or make you alter your decisions.

 

[AzureOrchid]

This is going to sound wrong, but I'm a little relieved I'm not the only one. I'm 28 and have a history of irregularity. I have had a very naturally low BMI for most of my life and it wasn't until 2012 that I started to have regular periods. Prior to that it wasn't unusual for me to go a year or so without having a single one!!

I used to work with horses for a living and used to administer this hormone to the female horses called Regumate. To this day I worry that this is going to be the killer of my fertility. Genetically, my family is very fertile so I'm not concerned about that. But this hormonal substance was very messy and can be easily absorbed if any spilled from the bottle/syringe/horse's mouth onto my skin. After learning more about it (my boss had not fully informed me at the time) I stopped administering it, but only time will tell if it has any lasting effects.

That being said, my cycle was very regular for about two years starting in 2012 until recently. I'm on CD 42, the second month in a row I've gone over 40 days. It's like they keep getting longer each month and it just makes me wonder.

 

[Child2Hold]

There are months where I have this fear of never being able to have children. My family has issues getting pregnant. Took my mom 10 years after having me to have my sister. Then again my grandmother had 8 kids. I've already had a chemical in the past so that adds to my fears. I can't wait until I start TTC to know.