Scared to DTD =\

[Mummyxofx2]

Ok so in 23 days pp. I'm still bleeding so won't be DTD still for a while but I'm actually scared to lol. I wasn't in relationships with the previous 2 births and it was months before I DTD afterwards. So I don't know what to expect. TMI ALERT but I have a bartholonin cyst and I checked that today for the first time since having lo as I thought it may have popped during birth ( it didn't grrrr) but I am still very tender down under. How ling did you wait and how long did you take to heal with just slight tears and grazes no stitches. I know everyone is different but was hoping for a estimate.

 

[optimistic1]

I was cut and had stitches and I stopped bleading at 6 weeks was healed probably a week or so before then and dtd for the first time at 7 weeks with no pain or problems. You'll probably heal pretty quickly with no stitches. I have no idea what the cyst is that you have so I can't tell you it wont hurt when you dtd but don't be afraid I was afraid and if I would have let that stop me I would have missed out on a very much needed romance night. Its a healthy part of your relationship just let your OH know to be very gentle and warn him that if it hurts to badly he may have to stop. You'll probably be fine though.

 

[Mummyxofx2]

Thanks Hun. The cyst is a blocked duct it's only the size of a pea just in the opening that isn't what is tender still it's the surroundings lol without going into to much detail I went just a tad past the cyst and noticed it still was still tender. ( I was in the shower lol ) before you think eww dirty bit lol

 

[chezababy]

I had a bad cut and had a lot of stitches but healed well and had sex 5 weeks after with no pain. We just went really slow in case it was painful. I'm sure you'll be fine but you don't have to do anything until you're ready as I'm sure being overly nervous will make it much less enjoyable.

 

[RoseArcana]

I had an episiotomy (to the side, not perineum) and stitches and we DTD at 3 weeks PP As long as you take it slow then you should be fine. If it hurts then stop. Good luck x

 

[Sparrow85]

I had a forceps delivery and episiotomy. I was in agony for the first couple of weeks and then it started to feel a bit better.

We DTD 5 weeks PP and it was absolutely fine. It was a bit sore at first, but the thought was worse than actually doing it.

 

[MrsSmartie]

Tbh I had no tears but I am still finding it a bit uncomfortable and certainly not pleasurable yet! I don't think it is psychological because I am very good at relaxing and had no pain with the speculum for my coil etc. It just feels a bit weird at the start, need loads of lube and if we try to speed up or do any 'deeper' positions then it just feels a bit uncomfortable. I don't know why, these things just take time I guess. I try to do it every so often because I reckon the more we dtd, the easier it will get. Fyi, we first dtd at 6 days pp! (Mental) and it was ok! I think I was just insanely hormonal and still on a birth high. Not usually so keen!

 

[MumMumMum]

I stopped bleeding around 3.5 weeks. We dtd at 4 weeks. I had a 2nd degree tear and stitches.

It was fine, just warn him to be gentle.

I was/am more scared of getting pregnant again!

 

[missk1989]

I had a slight tear no stitches. We waited 8 weeks and it was a little tender around the tear but not bad.

 

[icklemonster]

I had a small first degree tear and only needed a couple of stitches. We waited until my pp bleeding had stopped so must have been about 7 weeks! It was quite uncomfortable, but I think it's because I was so nervous! We've only done it a handful of times since. TMI but my boobs are what gets me turned on the most, but I can't have DH touching them while they are LO's food containers. Purely psychological but I can't shake it. I try to please him in other ways though lol!

 

[Mummyxofx2]

I have been pleasing in other ways but oh says its not the same as dtd. He isn't pressuring me but I'm looking forward to it to as its been since 20 weeks pregnant that I have enjoyed DTD as I was so awollen down below while pregnant.

 

[TryinFor1]

I had a third degree episiotomy (almost fourth degree tear) with stitches. We dtd at 6.5 weeks pp and we were fine.

 

[counting]

We DTD for the first time two nights ago, so 19 days PP. That was the same time my bleeding stopped and two days after my stitches completely dissolved. It hurt a TINY bit when he first went in, but it stopped once things got moving. Should have rested more in between times though, as we tried again yesterday night (20 days PP) and we were able but it was sore/ bruised feeling, probably partailly due to the fact it had been so long since we DTD last that I actually DID bruise from stretching- crazy to think since I pushed a baby out less than 3 weeks before but everything bounced back very nicely.

To give some perspective I had a vaginal delivery, three internal first degree tears(had to be stitched, not sure how many stitches, I think about 25 total, they were internal so I couldn't actually see) and my inner labia lip was split just below my clitoris, this wasn't stitched but probably should have been as it healed split. Anyway, I was scared too but even with the damaged that I had, everything went surprisingly smoothly! Good luck!