Scared

[Ellianna]

Hiya everyone
I'm 17 and I've just found out I'm pregnant.
I really really don't know what to do. I really don't feel old enough or ready to be a mum, but I hate the idea of a termination and I don't think I could go through it all just to give my baby away.
My boyfriend says he will support me whatever I decide, but I know that my mum and my big brother will go mad at both of us. I just feel so alone right now, could really use some support. Any advice to help me decide what to do? I just can't get my head around it at the moment.
Thanks
Ellianna x

 

[Carrie J.]

Hi Ellianna,

I know EXACTLY how you feel....I am 16 years old and 7 weeks pregnant. I know that I could never have an abortion so I want to keep my baby. I haven't told my mom that I'm pregnant yet....my mom and dad are divorced and I don't see my dad. My aunt is going to help me tell my mom tomorrow. I don't think she will be mad but she will really be disappointed. If you want someone to talk to, I have Yahoo Messenger.....my name [email protected]

 

[Serene123]

If you can't have an abortion or put your baby up for adoption then it sounds to me like you've decided. All you have to do now is get up the courage to tell people. It's hard, I've been there. I'm eighteen. Sure people were disappointed but they get over it. That's a baby inside of you. If it's a part of you it's part of your mum and dad too. They'll understand. These things happen.

 

[Always&4ever]

Hi honey,

I think most first-time mothers feel the same, I'm 24 and was terrified of telling my family but at the end of the days, its ur body and ur baby.

 

[alyssa3857]

Hi hun,

I'm 16 and almost 18 weeks pregnant. I was really scared when I found out and I still am. I knew I couldn't have an abortion and I didn't think there was anyway to give up my baby. My cousin helped me tell my parents. They were disappointed but they weren't furious. There were a lot of factors but I made the decision to come and live with my cousin. I'm getting really excited about my baby. It's so amazing to have another person growing inside of you. You need to make the best decision for you and your baby. Not others. Good luck.

 

[lilmumma]

hey, im 19, and just had my third lol, all to same daddy, but we were still scared of telling our parents each time lol. It'll be easy once you start to pluck up the courage, i think in your mind, youve made your decision, and by joiing a forum it shows all you need is a little support and help, which people on here can give to you. Just be strong and let them know, if you want this child, dont let any one tell yu otherwise.

Good Luck hun, im on MSN if you need to chat, [email protected]

 

[Ellianna]

Hiya
Thanks so much for all ur comments, its definitely helped me feel a bit better about all of this and realise how much support there is out there. I think I just needed some time for myself to think about what has happened and what's going to happen.
After thinking a lot and talking about it with my boyfriend, we've decided that we both want to keep the baby. Now I just have to tell my mum and my brother. I know that they're going to be dissapointed, but hopefully it'll be ok. I don't see my dad that much (about four or five times a year) but obviosly I'm going to have to tell him he's going to be a grandad! I'm not really sure how he's going to react, I guess I'll find out though.
Any tips on how to tell parents?? How did u guys tell yours?
Thanks
Ellianna
x

 

[alyssa3857]

I told my cousin first. She sat down with me and my parents and helped me tell them. This helped me a lot because I started crying right away.

 

[lilmumma]

i told my twin sister, bot of a cop out really, she was pregnant before me so it softened the blow a little i guess. it's hard hun, we're all with you x x x

 

[mommy2raven]

Hey hunni so glad to hear ur keeping your bump!!! The easiest way is just to come straight out and say it, I know how scared you are I'm 18 and found out I was pregnant with my 1st at 15 and had her at 16 and im now pregnant with #2!!! It is hard but your mom and brother will deal with it good luck xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

 

[Imi]

Just tell them darling, take someone with you and come out with it ...

don't be scared, the worst they can do is shout?!

good luc and CONGRATS to you and OH!!!
xxx

 

[Ellianna]

Thanks guys
I've been thinking about it alot (as you can probably tell as I'm on the net at 2am!) and I think I'm just gona go ahead and tell them. Just sit them down and tell them what I'm gona do. I'm scared though, it makes it all so real. But it has to happen sometime!

Thank you so much for all ur comments and support, you've all been brilliant. I didn't really know what would happen when I put this post up, I just needed somewhere to turn to and to talk to people who knew what I was through but you have been absolutely great, and made me feel so much better about it all.

Ellianna
x

 

[Imi]

Anytime hun,

good luck and tell us all about it soon ...

xxx

 

[mommy2raven]

Your Welcome hunni let us know how u get on xoxoxoxoxox

 

[lilmumma]

everyones here for you to talk to it'll be ok hun, and like a huge weight has been lifted once you tell them

 

[Ellianna]

Ok I know this sounds stupid but something happened today and it kinda made me doubt my decision.
I got a letter from Manchester university making me and offer for the Social Work degree I applied to do. The admission process is really tough (1200 apply, 200 get asked for interview and they make 70 offers) and I'm so happy I got in but now its started me thinking about how on earth I can possible do it if I have a baby.
I know that it shouldn't change anything, but it just did. I so want to go, and what if I can't? I feel awfull, that sounds so selfish but I'm so scared I'll regret my decision. I just don't know what to do.
Ellianna
x

 

[mummyoffive]

Ok I know this sounds stupid but something happened today and it kinda made me doubt my decision.
I got a letter from Manchester university making me and offer for the Social Work degree I applied to do. The admission process is really tough (1200 apply, 200 get asked for interview and they make 70 offers) and I'm so happy I got in but now its started me thinking about how on earth I can possible do it if I have a baby.
I know that it shouldn't change anything, but it just did. I so want to go, and what if I can't? I feel awfull, that sounds so selfish but I'm so scared I'll regret my decision. I just don't know what to do.
Ellianna
x

Hi Ellianna
I am a mummy of five at 26, i had my 1st at 16. and I am currently at college, working part time and looking after my children.. I have just applied to uni for a midwifery degree and although it is difficult it CAN be done. I am sure that you will find that your family will be lot more supportive than you think. You need to make the right decision for YOU and your PARTNER . It is a long hard road being a parent at a young age and although i would not advise somebody to deliberately take this route it is possible to have a career, study and do whatever you put your mind to with alot of hard work and dedication. Maybe speak to ur family and seek advice from your uni to see if they can offer any help and support with any issues that concern you. You may be able to delay your start until after the baby was born or they may be able to offer assistance with childcare / funding issues etc... GOOD LUCK whatever you decide. I f you need to talk, dont hestate to contact. kelx

 

[lilmumma]

my sister is in uni now at 21 and is 7 months pregnant, uni's do all they can to help you. they cant single you oout because you have a child. just go and do whats necessary, if your good enought o get a place, theyll giv it to you, even if you dont accept this yr if you find it tough, ask them to do it for next yr, they can do that

 

[xarlenex]

Theres lotsa help for people wanting to pursue careers when they've got kids, if you choose to keep the baby then you just gotta find out what the uni offers.
Only you know what the right decision for yourself is. You dont wanna spend half your life regreting past decisions. Just take time to yourself and think about whats really right for you. Alot to deal with but life is difficult 90% of the time.