Sharing a room

[tiredmumma]

Our two girls are 26 months apart. They are now coming up to 6 and 4. They have shared a room for a long time. We have always given them the choice - share or have a room each. Just before Christmas we got them bunk beds as our youngest was outgrowing her toddler bed. Now they are bickering more than ever. Party because DD2 has her own mind and won't be bossed around and partly because DD1 has started going on play dates and has been playing with older siblings and developed more of an attitude than we'd like.

I have said to them that if they can't share and play nicely in the day they can't share a room. Today DD2 said she wants her own room. DD1 got very upset and said she still wants to share. Talked to them both and somehow they both changed their mind and so still don't agree!

I want them to be happy either way, but I'm also sad that they might not share and worried they won't be so close. Until recently they were very close, all the time.

Has anyone got any experience either way that they could share?

 

[lau86]

My two boys share, sometimes they do bicker during the day but I've never thought about saying they can't share at night because of it. I can see why you would do that but maybe you've started something there!
Really difficult as there's no compromise, either they share or they don't. Maybe give them a trial apart and see how it goes?
I think the best way for them to be close is for them to have their own space if they need it. Not easy when they don't agree!

 

[tiredmumma]

My two boys share, sometimes they do bicker during the day but I've never thought about saying they can't share at night because of it. I can see why you would do that but maybe you've started something there!
Really difficult as there's no compromise, either they share or they don't. Maybe give them a trial apart and see how it goes?
I think the best way for them to be close is for them to have their own space if they need it. Not easy when they don't agree!

To be honest, a few instances was fine. It's when they bicker constantly from school pick up until bedtime that led me to suggest it. Today was particularly draining. I just want them to get along

It wouldn't be too involved to set her up in the other room. We've agreed with them that if they want to, they can try it at the weekend.

 

[Parkep]

I would let them try seperate they might surprise you and want to go back together.

 

[george83]

Could you leave the bunk beds up and buy a cheap single bed for the other room and follow through on separating them and see if they actually like it or want to go back in together?

 

[jd83]

I don't know that them having separate rooms would necessarily solve the problem of them fighting during the day. My boys are also 2 yrs apart, and some days they get along famously, and others they fight nonstop from the time we get home. When they fight like that, the best thing that helps is just to separate them completely right when its happening. I have them go play in different rooms, until they can calm down and decide they WANT to play with each other again. It's not a choice; they have to play separately for a while if they are fighting that much. Honestly, it really does help. A lot.

 

[Eleanor ace]

I'd give separate rooms a go, see how it goes. You could always leave the bunk beds up and then they have the option of going in together if its what they both want, perhaps on the weekends so it feels like a bit of a treat. My brothers shared a room and it caused some issues between them, I think they would have got on better if my older brother had his own space (although it wasn't an option).

 

[Wobbles]

Mine had separate rooms, one of the girls had a single sleeper my other dd had bunk beds, on weekends they would share the room with bunk beds in and watch a movie. They were desperate to share and now they do it's an absolute nightmare ... they are 2 very different people. my youngest is loud and bouncy my eldest quite often likes peace and to sit with a book etc. They will be back in their own rooms at some point in the near future Aside the chaos of rooms my 2 are very close to each other, I'm not worried about that. x

 

[tiredmumma]

Thanks ladies. After all that and getting the other room ready they changed their minds and are staying put! Kids!

 

[Wobbles]

Mine will be going back to own rooms for my sanity

 

[Vickie]

Mine still share a room they've occasionally wanted to separate but they always change their minds before we actually do anything about it

 

[becsboo]

mine share but you could always try it
children change there minds as often as the wind lol