should I?

[teal]

I feel really confused and I know I need to make a decision soon since my little boy will hopefully be here soon.

I mentioned before that my ex/FOB doesn't want to know. I received a few harrassing/threatening emails from him at Christmas time but I've heard nothing from him since (that's been 6 weeks). I asked him three times if he wanted to know when LO was born and three times he ignored me.

Now I'm trying to decide if I should still send him an email once LO is born (and registered) to let him know. I thought I had made my decision and was going to leave things as they are. After all he can contact me - I'm not the one who changed my phone number.

What worries me is how threatening and pushy he can be when he doesn't get his own way He managed to stress me out and give me a really hard time over Christmas without even asking about LO.

I wish I just knew I was making the right decision. As much as it scared me at the time - with him saying how I can expect to see him and I can't ignore him etc. maybe it would be better to tell him for the sake of LO.

I just don't know. I can't even begin to imagine seeing him again after half of what was said in his emails to me. (which I have kept).

On top of the threatening behaviour he hasn't even asked about LO at all. He doesn't know how far along I am, when I'm due, the sex of the baby, if I'm organised. Nothing. He just seems to appear when he has nothing better to do and wants to get to me.

Sorry I've gone on and not making sense

 

[miss.ditz]

I'm so sorry sweetheart *hugs* Personally with someone being like that, I think you've tried your best. Don't worry or let him break your heart over and over again, just focus on you and the the LO as the baby is your piority xx

 

[Aidedhoney]

Sorry hun didnt want to read and run but i would let him know when bubs is here, then that way you can hold your head up high knowing that you let him know.

As for his behaviour i wouldnt let it drag you down,

 

[Ash_P]

Totally understnad where ur coming from hun. I think best thing to do is wait til u have LO ans then make ur decision. Ul be in a different frame of mind then. Clearly he has no interest in LO or even how u r doing, so in a way he doesnt deserve to know anything. But ul know urself once u have it what the best course of action is to take.
I went thru same thing with FOB only the harrassing and abusive behaviour was to my face, he called my baby a "FUCKING THING" so I went to the police, got a non-molestation order out against him, so he is not allowed to contact me, and if I contact him, Im kinda encouraging contact, so Im not really allowed to, which has made my choice for me in regards to informing him on DOB of bubs etc.

Social services are now involved with my case because he is seen to be a threat to me and LO so they have said they will let him know when LO is born (if I want them to)

Dotn make any decisions now, wait and see how u feel. I could probably be certain that once u go thru labour, and hold that wee darlin in ur arms, FOB will be the last thing on ur mind.
U both deserve better than him, so dont be getting stressed. Try and stay calm for the last bit of ur pregnancy and look forward to meeting ur wee munchkin.

Sorry hope this helps, I do tend to go off on one at times lol (blame the hormones lol)

 

[lou_w34]

Ahh we never no if we are making the right decisions... we just have to hope that we are

I know he's being a tit, but i personally would tell him, just so that in the future you can say to your lil one that you did let his dad know, and keep the email as proof.

xxx

 

[expecting09]

I agree, I would just send him a short email saying that bubs is here, I wouldn't go into too much detail. It doesn't sound like he wants to know anyway, so if you get a reply asking more it will be a suprise

 

[littlekitten8]

I agree with Lou hun. Send him a quick email to let him know LO is born. Then leave it up to him if he wants to contact you. And keep the email as proof that you did let him know so when LO asks you you can show them you did actually tell daddy they were here and he just didn't want to know.

 

[sweetlullaby]

I agree with Ash....decide once LO is here thats what I done

 

[purpledahlia]

I had the same dilema, in the end i did text him, He took 2 days to reply! and still not seen her and shes 7weeks now. But i let him kno! u'll feel better that you did/if you do. x

 

[suzanne108]

I agree with the others that said you should tell him, no need to go into much detail and I'd hope not to hear anything back! At least that way when LO is older and starts asking questions you can say you always did the right thing good luck, not long to go!! Xx

 

[Linz88]

maybe you should get an injunction because that sounds scary.