Single for the first time ever and at the worst time ever

[lilmills]

Hi everyone,
I belong here now. I am 23 years old I have a 2 year old dd and I am 14ish weeks pregnant with my second child. Me and my oh have been together for 7 and a bit years. we were happy at some point but when we split up i found out i was pg with my dd so we got bk together. Since being pg again my oh has given me no support, we both have financial worries but he still is so selfish with his money. We have just been told our pregnancy has a higher chance of being down syndrome and he hasn't cried at all, he doesn't want this baby i know it and he does.

I decided to speak to my mom and she wants me and my dd home with her, she is clearing a room as i type lol! I know I have to leave but i cant imagine bringing a baby into the world who literally has no dad! it will be so weird being single again after so long and i know not for the next couple of years but at some point i will want a relationship and who will date a 25ish year old with two kids

I'm really scared to do this alone i have my mom and dad as support and they are more than happy to care for us all but i haven't been single at all through my adult life!

 

[lilgemsy]

Being single isnt as bad as it might seem.
Especially if you have a loving, caring, supportive family around you! Which it seems like you do

And, youd be surprised, when you start dating again that theres men out there who dont care if you have no kids or if you have 10. Theyll love you for who you are, and accept that your children come as part of the package and will love them too!

I hope things look up for you soon and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy x

 

[Jennifurball]

I felt the same, I kept putting up with his crap because I didn't want to be single, or have my daughter without a dad. But I HAD to do it because there was no way I could carry on paying for everything as my wage drops heavily next month. He spent all his wages on himself.

He is now moving to another country as we speak to get away. I feel sad but Scarlett is happy now, she is in a happy loving environment instead of one full of arguing and negativity.

I have been told by many men it wouldn't bother them. In this day and age, it is more uncommon to not have kids.

You will be fine. It hasn't even been a week for me but I am feeling better-ish. It is still sad, all break ups are but if they aren't right for us then why stay? There are millions of men on this planet, don't settle for second best. I was always jealous of girls who have kids and a wonderful partner but why be jealous when I could be one of those girls?

 

[KayBea]

im also 23 & recently single, i have a dd whos 18 months
FOB has nothing to do with LO (his choice)...

it hurt so bad when we split (DV).. but i was getting over him quite well until i found out he had a new GF a week ago.. it hurts cos hes had nothing to with us & has basically kicked us to the kurb!!!

its hard i wont lie but you need to get out of it before its too late
you have supportive family by the looks of it xx

 

[lilmills]

you know what girls after gaining some perspective and having a good cry I know I will be ok and their the ones losing out aren't they! My dd is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me and if i hadn't had him I wouldnt have her, he did something good at least lol!

 

[emeraldbaby]

I'm pregnant for the first time to my husband (now separated). Its really hard even though I know I did the right thing in leaving (Due to DV). I wish my child could've had a nuclear family, and me a emotionally healthy , supportive husband.. . but that's all it is- wishful thinking.
I feel for you, but am so glad you have a supportive family to take you under their wing. Your babies will be all you ever need x

 

[Laura2919]

I agree. It's not as bad as it seems or bad as some make out. I split with FOB this time last year. I am happier now than I have been in a long time and that's because I took the steps to change the bad things.
I was seeing someone but things didn't work out and I am single again but I know I can do it cos I have done it already

You'll be fine, you can't stay in a relationship you are not happy in

 

[Mummy2B21]

Its always hard at first but it will get easier huni.. Chin up xxx