Single teen mom!

[Mommy14]

Well, I'm in about my 11th week and I'm 14 years old.
The father is 16, and we currently aren't together. He and his best friend know that I am pregnant. His best friend blames it entirely on me, calling me some VERY rude names, and saying its all my fault if the father goes to jail and can't get a job once he gets out
The father though, has been nothing but un-supportive this whole time. He has no job, not even his license, and even went as far to say that when he does get a job, he won't support me or the baby a bit and will just spend his money on video games.
I guess all that talk of getting married and having a family really changes once you really are pregnant
What should I do?
Is anyone else in this same situation?

 

[braddys]

:wave:

First of all

Im not sure what the laws are where you live but it is definatly not your fault if he goes to prison and cant get a job when he gets out. It takes two to make a baby so dont let him make you feel guilty.

As for the money you can always take him to court and he will have to pay child support which is a fixed amount every week.

Do any of your friends know? or family? It sounds like you could do with some support

 

[Lillismommy]

(Not a single mom, but wanted to come in here and help out)

Hon, have you told any of your family yet? I think it's important to talk to your parent(s) so that you can get some A) support and B) medical care. Are you getting medical care right now?

 

[Mommy14]

No, I haven't told my parents yet or had any medical care...
I will be telling my mom after this weekend though for sure!

 

[QuintinsMommy]

have you been taking folic acid or any pre-natals?
I got pregnant 18 and single, its hard but you just have to tell your parents

 

[Mommy14]

I haven't been taking any pre-natals or vitamins

 

[QuintinsMommy]

well you should get on that, they are very important.

 

[Mommy14]

I'll get them from the Doc when I go to see him

 

[QuintinsMommy]

here in canada you can get them from walmart, drug stores etc.

 

[Mommy14]

I'm pretty sure I can get them in the same places, I just don't know which ones to get

 

[kirst1805]

Hun, you really need to tell your mum asap, at least if you haven't yet, she'll be able to help you and give you advice on what to take etc, because it is very important. Also you need to see a doctor straight away so you can get the right care.

Also it isn't your fault alone, it takes two to make a baby. I'd ignore FOB and his friend for now and concentrate on yourself at the min.

Not having a go but you really do need to tell your mum, dad or another family member straight away.
This isn't something you should have to deal with alone.

xxx

 

[Mommy14]

My mom wouldn't know what to take because she didn't go to the doc, have a midwife, or take any pre-natals or vitamins during both of her pregnancies, didn't even go to a hospital to give labor...So I'm kind of nervous that she won't do anything for me

 

[kirst1805]

how about any close family friends or other family members?

 

[QuintinsMommy]

do you have any old siblings to talk to ?
this is what I took when pregnant https://www.materna.ca/ it seems to be the most common one, plus I took just a plain folic acid

 

[Mommy14]

Two of my teenage cousins had babies last year, one with a boy and one with a girl...I could probably get some hand me down's and they know some ways to get support. I'll ask them about it.

 

[QuintinsMommy]

yea i would go talk to them hun

 

[Mommy14]

I will

 

[mamashakesit]

Mommy14, I am in MN as well and you can get excellent benefits through the state for up to 2 years for both you and the baby. You are in one of the BEST states for that.

As for the dad...write him off. If he comes around later on, great, but don't waste your time trying to get him to come along for the ride. Enjoy it on your own...

 

[16mommy2b]

hey so first of all congrats on your pregnacy and im sorry about the fob my fob is also always in and out of jail so i finally got the nerve to kick him out of the picture and i knowww he wants to be a dad to my baby but he has to get hes life straigtend out first and i doubtttt hes going to change hes being duin this sence he was in 10 and hes guna be 17 alreddy and he changes for a day or two but always goes back..so pretty much what im trying to say is dont even think about the dad in the picture and just get stronger by urself and just think about your baby whenever your feeling down thats what i have to do....and good luck telling ur mom..its hard at first but things eventually cool down...and u need to get going to the docters already to make shur everything is good so far..msg me wenever u need to talk..

 

[Mommy14]

Yea, I think I'm going to keep the FOB out of the picture. He always takes away my friends and this is the time I need them most.