So confused....

[LaLa09]

Hey ladies!!!
I'm new here, but I've been snooping around this site for a while. I just finally decided to join!
So here is my situation:
I married my high school sweetheart in April after 8 years of dating. I'm 23 & hubby is 26. We both have steady jobs that we love. We bought a house together last Nov and the house is coming along just great. Hubby is ready to start trying for a little one and I'm the one who is hesitant.Here's my reason why-> My Uncle just recently got diagnoised with metastatic pancreatic cancer and the doctors say that all we can do is chemotherapy and hope that it will slow the process down. It doesn't look very good at all I have a small, close family and it greatly effects every single one of us. I just feel like if we were to start trying that I am being selfish and that we should be focusing on my uncle. Is this crazy thinking?! I spoke with a close friend about it and she told me that miracles come with the hard things in life and that I shouldn't let it affect us trying to conceive. Hubby told me that he is fine with waiting until I'm ready, and that he doesn't want to rush me.
I can't wait for a little one and I get sooooo excited thinking about it, but then I think about my Uncle & it breaks my heart. ADVICE would be greatly appreciated, because I'm so confused

 

[shocker]

I dont think your uncle being sick should affect you ttc, thats just my opinion though! I think your uncle would be ecstatic to find out he was going to be a great uncle and it would be great for him to have something so positive to keep his spirits up during this difficult time.I will keep him in my thoughts and good luck

 

[Cinnamon]

Oh dear, that's a terrible situation you're in, I'm so sorry. Maybe there is a half way solution for you. In between WTT (waiting to try)and actively TTC(trying to concieve) there is NTNP(not trying not preventing). It's about having unprotected sex but without taking your temperature, checking your ovulation days, etc. Just letting nature take it's course. What will have to be will be and I don't think your family will think you selfish, you are entitled to lead your life the way you want it and it doesn't mean that you care less, it's just life. Best of all, I also think your uncle would be glad for you. You have a great hubby that suports you, what does he think? Do what deep down makes you feel best. Good luck.xxx

 

[Webbykinskt]

I agree with shocker and cinnamon. If it was myself in your uncle's position, I would love to know a little one was on the way. I am so sorry about your uncle but i'm sure he wouldn't want you to put your life on hold for him.

Good luck making your decison x

 

[Daisy Delayne]

If I was ill I would hate to to think I was preventing my family from doing something they wanted to do. And when it comes to creating joy and optimism, there's nothing like brand new baby.

 

[Strawberries]

I agree with the others, I'm sure your uncle would love to know a little one was on the way and I don't think he'd like to think that he was keeping you back from doing what you want to do; but I understand your feelings. Good luck x

 

[runnergrl]

you are too sweet and so unselfish, but the others are right, you and your hubby trying may give your uncle something to look forward to. Optimism and goals for living are very powerful things when battling a disease. Its amazing what people will themselves to live for.

Good Luck in whatever you decide. Just knowing that you have the support of your husband either way is an awesome feeling isnt it?

to you, honey. I'll say a little prayer right now

 

[chrisymills08]

I think your family deserves some happiness would your uncle want you to put this off. Good luck with your decision.xxx

 

[LaLa09]

So ladies... I know I haven't responded in a while because I've been thinking... And we have decided to try and just let things happen, what ever happens is meant to happen! My hubby is thrilled..who would have ever thought he would be more excited than me! lol
Thanks for all the thoughts....it means alot! It gave me a diffrent look on the situation, and you are right. I'm sure he would be happy to find out that he would be a great uncle! (Well, we will just have to wait and see what the future holds for us.)

 

[runnergrl]

so happy to hear! and best of luck