So confused....

[LilDreamy]

Hi! This is my first time posting on this section of the forums, mainly because I didn't want to admit to myself that I am going to be a single parent.

I am only 7 weeks pregnant.

Everything was going great.

I was visiting my fiance (were supposed to be getting married in July), we work 3 hours away from each other. We have been together for 3 years.

The 4 days that I went to visit and spend time with him, just so happened to be perfect timing. I got pregnant. Of course at the time I didn't know I was pregnant yet.

He is known for cheating on me. He did it twice already, so I was already driving myself crazy. Everytime he never answered his phone when I called or he would recieve text messages all the time when I was with him. I just knew deep down what was going on. I never showed that it bothered me, because when I did he would always get really angry and threaten to leave me because I don't trust him.

It had been a good 8 months since an incident and I thought we were doing REALLY great. Then one day (during those 4 days I went to visit him), he went to work. Just out of curiousity, I just wanted to look at his pictures on his camera. I actually wasn't snooping this time.

And... I just so happened to come across a picture of a female he barely knew for 3 weeks, in his apartment. So, I figured this gave me permission to get answers. SOO I snooped onto his e-mail. And Oh-My-GAH! The news that I learned. I found out he was talking to that female, AND that's not the worste. I found out he has three different children from three different women! One baby was no older than a year old! One looked 5 and the other looked 12! I grew sick to my stomach. And I found this out before I knew I was already pregnant. :/

We had been together 3 years... and he never told me anything...

It's like he's two different people. He's an amazing person, loving, caring, tender, strong, bold.... yet so many deep dirty secrets. It's so unreal...

Then we fought for a few days, I forgave him, and said we'll think of something. And asked why he never told me, he said he wanted to, but he was just afraid of what I would think.

We were good...

Then I broke the news to him that I was pregnant. He completely flipped out and didn't want anything to do with me. Went like this for a few days. He said we were never going to get married and he wasn't going to let me use my pregnancy as a way to force him into marriage. ??? wth? We were planning to get married before this anyway, unless he was lying and just saying that.

Then I went to visit him another 4 days. And in person... he acts so different. He rubbed my belly and said, "I don't know if I've told you this yet, but everything is going to be ok, I promise." He said he was going to be there for me, and talking about gettting an apartment together and taking care of the baby.

Does he mean it? Should I accept it? Is he lying to me again?

I'm really confused and don't know what to do.


I'm really sorry for the rant. It's just driving me crazy.

I want what's best for my baby. I honestly don't know if it would be better for the baby to be without him. I'm afraid the baby will get hurt. And my guy is so unpredictable it's making me sick. All of my family and friends keep telling me to leave him... but I don't want my baby to be fatherless. :/

PS. Really sorry for the long post. I needed to get this off of my chest.

 

[Linz88]

he has no respect for you.. and he realy is not planning on sticking with you cause if he would he would have told you about the children.. i am reli sorry but u and baby wil b betta off with out him... my ex done the same thing to me. and i was thinkin that its too unreal bcuz hez such a sweet person.. good luk hun.. xxxxxxxx

 

[littlekitten8]

Just wanted to wish you luck in whatever decision you make. Only you can decide whether you are better off without him but from what you have written I would suggest you probably are x

 

[LilDreamy]

Thank you for both of your replies.

I guess I can just pray for the best.

*hugs*

 

[Arielle]

I would just completely ignore him. If he treats his own children that way he will never treat you any better. Save yourself the pain and try to move on.

 

[pink23]

goodluck in whatever you decide and remember that you and baby come first now xx

 

[lou_w34]

Id say you and baby deserve better, but good luck in whatever you decide

x

 

[aliss]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. As much as you feel that the baby will be hurt without him and fatherless - there are three other babies and mothers that have likely gone through the exact same situation. Please listen to your friends and family because they want and know what is best for you and your baby - this man has no regard for you or this would have never happened.

And quite frankly, with a person like this, I'm sure he has told the mother of the one year old the exact same thing. This man is a liar and a cheat - how many times does he have to cheat and lie before you will believe who he really is?