So sad right now

[August79]

Like a fool, I tested before a missed AF though I said I wouldn't and got a BFN. Which is sad enough but on the heels of that came future MIL texting and saying that DF's cousin is 15 weeks pregnant with twins. She has six or seven children already with the last few very close together. The latest is only 6 months old. She gets pregnant so easily and I can't conceive and keep one? Really??!!! I just feel like time is working against me. I tried to wait and be responsible and now it's not happening.

It also frustrates me that DF says he wants to ttc but doesn't always want to bd on the right days. I understand he's tired but I need him to power through (so to speak) I don't think he gets the difference between NTNP and ttc. I'm in the ttc mind set and he says he is but acts like NTNP to me. He has two children from a previous relationship so maybe that's why it's not as upsetting to him when it doesn't happen.

I know that some of ya'll feel the same and I don't have anyone else to express this to right now. After my miscarriage I haven't even told anyone that we're ttc.

 

[bexxc]

i too have the bfn and everyone i know is "accidentally" getting pregnant with their twentieth child and i don't even get one blues. but look on the bright side: at least you didn't throw a really embarrassing all out sobbing crazy temper tantrum in front of your dh that ended in the untimely, brutal, senseless demise of a dozen eggs...a little emotional? yep.

 

[August79]

Thanks, that made me smile A dozen eggs huh? Oh the emotional outburst may come later. I bet he's known but has been smart enough to keep his mouth closed about her being pregnant but for whatever reason it still makes me mad. Maybe I'll calm down in the hour or so before he gets home...

Poor guy, since I can't say it's pregnancy hormones it must be PMS. Booo!!

 

[bexxc]

and if you don't calm down, you can always egg him as he walks in the door.

 

[August79]

He's gonna be coming in with food so I may hold off on the egging. I've been symptom spotting and thought the increased hunger was a symptom. Symptom of the witch and stress eating lol

This is such an emotional journey

 

[bexxc]

i'm really glad you've been here tonight! the last two days have been really hard on me. sometime no matter how supportive your family is, it's hard to not feel completely alone when you're the one going through all the ups and downs. THANKS!

 

[August79]

I'm so glad you've been here too You helped me to smile during a rough patch.

Wanna join a mutual admiration society?? lol

 

[bexxc]

if i don't get a bfp soon, i'm going to have to join an "i love my padded room" society!

 

[August79]

Awww. You'll pull through. I have faith in that and faith in that all of us will get a BFP soon!

 

[Clucky as]

The less stress we all put ourselves thru the better for our future babies. It's all I think about lately but I'm deter ined to change it. It's really depressing coz u want something d
Sooo bad and u have very very little control of when it can happen. Its all the u certaincy I think