Soo annoyed...

[charlotte88]

Went to see the midwife today it was a different one to who id had last time and i asked her about something in my maternity notes.

In the how to feed baby bit it said "Wants to b/f" i wasnt sure what this meant and the new midwife told me it meant i wanted to breast feed.

Firstly this annoyed me because i specifically told my midwife last time that i DID not want to breast feed for personal reasons and i will be bottle feeding.

I told my new midwife my reasons and how i feel that my brothers allergies and eczema were caused by breastfeeding as i wasnt breast fed and i am healthy and he was and he has asthma, skin complaints and various allergies.

Anyway she then went onto say "Well you have no reason to bottle feed, the only decent excuse is if you have aids"

IS SHE KIDDING ME!!!!!

OMG anyway sorry about my rant about this. was just so annoyed at her stupid comments and the fact my first midwife and clearly disregarded everything i had said to her.

 

[jellytot3]

Women like that shouldnt be midwives! x

 

[BexyD]

Wow I can understand you being annoyed!!! How rude!

Could it be possible the previous midwife put down BF - meaning bottle feeding when she perhaps should have put FF - formula feeding?

My personal opinion is that BF is unlikely to cause asthma etc, but who the hell is she to tell you what you should/shouldnt do!!

Your body, your baby, your choice.!

 

[CharlieKeys]

OMG... that's so not fair to make you feel guilty like that! I know that 'breast is best' or at least I've been told over and over and over again! But I FF my son after about 5 days and he's so much happier, I'm happier and I hate how some people/midwives/HVs make you feel like you're the worlds worst mother! I would have smacked her I think if she made that comment to me! (hormones.... I don't really go around smacking people lol)

 

[charlotte88]

i asked that too, but she said no the code they use is b/f for breast feeding and a/f for artificial feeding.

Even by calling it that you can tell that they are not big fans of bottles at my midwife center!

I know it cant cause it so to speak but it just seemed like a valid point that has been made and its also been something that has been quiet common in the rest of my family that the breast fed babies are unhealthier then the bottle fed. So it could be something in our genetics.

I dont think breastfeeding is wrong (i know alot of people frown on it due to being "inappropriate" in public) its just something that has never appealed to me and as they say if mum isnt happy, baby isnt happy.

xx

 

[BexyD]

i asked that too, but she said no the code they use is b/f for breast feeding and a/f for artificial feeding.

Even by calling it that you can tell that they are not big fans of bottles at my midwife center!

I know it cant cause it so to speak but it just seemed like a valid point that has been made and its also been something that has been quiet common in the rest of my family that the breast fed babies are unhealthier then the bottle fed. So it could be something in our genetics.

I dont think breastfeeding is wrong (i know alot of people frown on it due to being "inappropriate" in public) its just something that has never appealed to me and as they say if mum isnt happy, baby isnt happy.

xx

I'm too lazy to bottle feed so have never bothered with it. My reasons for BF are purely to do with that rather than the health aspects! Lol

Artificial feeding sounds so disguting and mechanical though!! Like you are expecting a robot and not a living breathing baby!!

I guess it's there job to promote BF, but this can be done in a way to give you all the facts, info and support without making you feel like a social leper!! Not matter how 'pro' breast feeding I am, no baby ever died from being FF!!!

 

[FEDup1981]

AIDS!!! Dark ages spring to mind. There are LOTS of perfectly valid reasons for not formula feeding (here they write it as F/F) and even if there isnt, and you just chose not to BF its YOUR choice at the end of the day!!

 

[gingerclaire]

Its your baby, your body , your choice hun!!
I would of gave her a big slap if that had been me

 

[heather91]

That is so f'ing rude of her! It's made me feel really angry reading this. I was advised to FF as DD was small and was losing too much weight as my milk hadnt come in. Everyone has their own reasons to FF it's absolutely NONE of their business and you should by no means have to explain yourself to anyone! xx

 

[Emma 21]

omg they daint want me at uni for midwifery yet they think it is acceptable for a midwife to speak to you like that

 

[morag99]

OMG how dare she say that!
It is a personal choice on how you feed your baby, and they are there to support you, not to comment or make you feel bad about your choice! I will be bottle feeding this time as I did last time and when I told my midwife she never even questioned me or batted an eyelid.

Also, if she knew anything about infectious diseases such as AIDS as she so kindly put it, she would know that you cant and dont catch AIDS. You catch HIV, the virus that then develops into AIDS. Silly silly woman!!!

 

[milf2be]

i asked that too, but she said no the code they use is b/f for breast feeding and a/f for artificial feeding.

Even by calling it that you can tell that they are not big fans of bottles at my midwife center!

I know it cant cause it so to speak but it just seemed like a valid point that has been made and its also been something that has been quiet common in the rest of my family that the breast fed babies are unhealthier then the bottle fed. So it could be something in our genetics.

I dont think breastfeeding is wrong (i know alot of people frown on it due to being "inappropriate" in public) its just something that has never appealed to me and as they say if mum isnt happy, baby isnt happy.

xx

aww i wouldnt feel offended by the artificially feeding abbreviation, its something that is used nationwide, im a student midwife and iv used it today. i wouldnt be surprised if it was called that to do with promoting breast feeding, but it is what it is.

i think it was very wrong for the midwife to write that and what the other one said to you. the first midwife might have just been on auto pilot and wrote the wrong thing, no excuse for upsetting u really, but everyone makes mistakes.

as for the allergies and eczema, i dont believe it was breast feeding that caused this. but its YOUR baby and YOUR decision how you feed YOUR baby. midwives have the duty to let you know about the benefits of breastfeeding to make sure you make an informed choice about how to feed your baby, but once you have made the decision she (or he!) needs to support you in that decision to make sure you and your baby receive the best possible care. maybe point that out to her if you see her again?

 

[charlotte88]

i appreciated her input when i spoke to the first lady because she actually made an effort to let me know the benefits etc. but i've always been sure that i will bottle feed.
It doesnt usually effect me as to how people judge my views and choices but to do it so harshly and be so obnoxious i think she is in the wrong profession, especially seeing as she should have a understanding ear and be supportive.

 

[kaz29]

u should of said "so what if i dont have aids, does that mean only ppl with aids are allowed to bottle feed?" and waited to see what she said and then just responded by saying "yeah but u mean in your opinion" - that would have annoyed her some...and id of asked if she could of given me the leaflet tht pointed out the information she had given me regarding bottle feeding and aids and that and to point out where on this leaflets does is state what she has just said to u?, and then id of said well maybe if i wanted your opinion on it then id of asked "what do u think" but i didnt ask you and now you've just made a really inappropriate statement to me and im all confussed so i need u to explain it ALL OVER again to me....lol

Id of just made her wish she would of kept her dammmm mouth shut !!!! t-heheheheeee

 

[abc123x]

Well, maybe they just think that breastfeeding was not the cause of your brother's problems.

Either way, next time I would just say "I don't want to, that's why." You don't have to explain it to them. You're not breast feeding. That's what she needs to write down.