sooo mad!

[syberspaced]

I am 41, had a 2nd trimester miscarriage in December. I am 7+2 and have had 1st scan, showing a bean, pole, and hb of 133. I am the mother of 2 daughters, 16 and 12. I am divorced, and my boyfriend is 43 and has never had children. I don't know if it's pregnancy hormones or what, but my boyfriend is working my nerves. He talks about the pregnancy with the neighbors, but will barely talk about it with me. He just seems immature and he alreally doesn't get along with my daughters too well. He has a jaded past and is a little behind in life, all he says is that having a baby scares him. I always wanted another baby, and I am thrilled that I am pregnant, hoping all goes well this time. Anyone have any coping advice? I'm tired of feeling stressed about my relationship, I don't want to be a single mom, but would be willing to if things keep going this way.

 

[crystal443]

so glad your scan went well!!! Sorry about the relationship problems, have you talked to him about it?

 

[syberspaced]

I am counting down to 2nd scan on June 11. That's also when they do the 1st genetics screen. As for my boyfriend, I try to paint a parenting picture as he is not well liked by my daughters, and he has immature reactions to 'normal' kid behavior. I try to remind myself that he's had little exposure to 'normal' and pray that he will rise to the task. Sometimes it's hard to remember that when he acts like a gigantic infant. If I speak to him he will never admit a mistake or say he was wrong about something.

 

[2have4kids]

Oooof, that's hard to deal with. My husband has a big problem apologising, we're working on things. We did a few online tests and it helped us not have so much friction around each other. Maybe your man would be open to this? If you google the 5 love language assessments there's a survey for you and him and one on apologies. May husband learned alot doing the apology one...he's like oh, I don't remember saying any of those. I turned to him and completely agreed, it was a rather telling moment. But it's helped us figure a few things out to make life a little smoother.
If he's really being a pain, try to spend the time alone with your girls, go out for walks or do things you don't normally do. It'll feel good and the worst thing for a guy who's on the immature side is to be left out of fun times for bad behaviour.
I wish you the best, the worst feeling is not being happy with your partner.