Squeamish OH?

[Rosella]

Hi Everyone,
My OH is very squeamish about blood etc, and there is quite a lot of apprehension about being present at the birth. He's really worried he's going to faint and get in the way etc, and I just want to be sure that I'm not left alone in loads of pain with no-one around. I know I can ask someone else to come along as well, but was wondering if anyone else had this problem and how they dealt with it? Is it something the OH's have to see or can they just hold your hand and not go looking around at the other end, IYKWIM? How involved are they really?

Any help much appreciated!!

 

[countessbump]

Just make it clear that he doesn't look below your waist at the end; the mw deals with that part, he deals with helping you stay in position, breathing and holding your hand for you to crush. Make it clear to your mw's that he doesn't want to see when the baby comes out. And don't worry, the hossie staff will be used to helping out squeamish OH's and will tell him when to concentrate on your face etc. (according to my mw).

 

[Rosella]

Thanks Countessbump.

 

[WelshGirl]

Although he's not squeamish, my OH has said he will be looking at my face & nothing else!!!
Just make sure the mw's are aware, so they don't try & get him to look.....and ask them if they can wipe & wrap your LO before you & your OH see....

 

[sparkswillfly]

My OH is the same he is staying up the head end! Ive put in my birth plan that he doesnt want to cut the cord or to be encouraged to look down there during the birthing process.

 

[Rosella]

My OH seems to be worried about even staying up near me and holding my hand for the birth bit, think he'd prefer not to be in the room at all!!

 

[sparkswillfly]

Some men do get a bit overwhelmed and have to leave the room! Its not unheard of

 

[Rosella]

Hmmm. This is exactly what I'm anticipating...

 

[LuluBee]

My husband faints whenever he has an injection - or even has to watch someone else have one (including our cat!). He really wants to be there at the birth and I really don't want to share it with anyone else but him. We've just agreed that he will stay at the head end of the bed and I am hoping that having an epidural will minimise the pain factor for me!

 

[Rosella]

Good luck LuluBee - I can see you haven't got long to go! Sounds like you have a good plan.

 

[pinkmac85]

My OH is exactly the same way as yours seems to be! So we have decided he is to just concentrate on my head/face and let me squeeze his hand. We are somewhat worried the nurses/doctors will try to tell him to hold my legs and look down, etc (as I don't have a MW just a doctor and depending when I go in labor it may just be whoever is on call that does the delivery for me!)
OH has already stated to me that he will NOT cut the cord as it will make him faint (I had assumed this already before he told me lol) as well as he would like baby to be wrapped before giving it to him!
Should be interesting to see how it plays out LOL

 

[Linzi]

Hi Everyone,
My OH is very squeamish about blood etc, and there is quite a lot of apprehension about being present at the birth. He's really worried he's going to faint and get in the way etc, and I just want to be sure that I'm not left alone in loads of pain with no-one around. I know I can ask someone else to come along as well, but was wondering if anyone else had this problem and how they dealt with it? Is it something the OH's have to see or can they just hold your hand and not go looking around at the other end, IYKWIM? How involved are they really?

Any help much appreciated!!

My OH is exactly the same. He fainted when I had bloood taken from my hand when I was in hospital before I was pregnant lol.

He was present during the whole birth and he said he didnt see a thing. He didnt want to cut the cord or see the placenta or anything, he didnt see his head crowning or anything... just stayed up the top end and was fine. He said he might have been queasy but was too focussed on looking after me because I was in pain bless him

There was no pressure on him to be down the 'business end' iykwim, he just stayed up by my head the whole time.

If he wants to be there but isnt sure really, could you have your mum or someone else there as well incase he decides he cant handle it and so you arent on your own?

xxx

 

[Rosella]

Hi Everyone,
My OH is very squeamish about blood etc, and there is quite a lot of apprehension about being present at the birth. He's really worried he's going to faint and get in the way etc, and I just want to be sure that I'm not left alone in loads of pain with no-one around. I know I can ask someone else to come along as well, but was wondering if anyone else had this problem and how they dealt with it? Is it something the OH's have to see or can they just hold your hand and not go looking around at the other end, IYKWIM? How involved are they really?

Any help much appreciated!!

My OH is exactly the same. He fainted when I had bloood taken from my hand when I was in hospital before I was pregnant lol.

He was present during the whole birth and he said he didnt see a thing. He didnt want to cut the cord or see the placenta or anything, he didnt see his head crowning or anything... just stayed up the top end and was fine. He said he might have been queasy but was too focussed on looking after me because I was in pain bless him

There was no pressure on him to be down the 'business end' iykwim, he just stayed up by my head the whole time.

If he wants to be there but isnt sure really, could you have your mum or someone else there as well incase he decides he cant handle it and so you arent on your own?

xxx

Thanks Linzi, that's a really encouraging message. He basically wants to be there for all of it, but is definitely worried about whether he'll manage with the last bit. I know my mum would be there is a flash so I do have the option of asking her. Also BGF would be fine, and my favourite aunt are also options (they live nearer to us than my mom). I would prefer OH to be there really, but am starting to get my head round what to do as a Plan B.

 

[XKatX]

My husband is really sqeumish and I worried the whole pregnancy about him being at the birth............he was the most amazing man ever when it came to it! I seriously don't know if I could have done it without him. He was wonderful and nothing bothered him at all. He even wandered down to the bottom end to look at the head coming out - much to my horror!! he still remembers it now and thinks it was the most amazing thing he has ever seen!
When it comes to it, it is not what you or him will be expecting, so he may surprise you. But if he feels the need to leave - let him pop to the bathroom for some time to breath and get his head together. that should be all it takes, before he's back with you.
Good luck to you both!!! x x

 

[Sovereign]

My OH is really worried about this too so like everyone else says he is staying at the head end.x

 

[minip2p]

I must admit that I am a bit aparahensive myself as I get squeemish if I am in the vet's with the cat, and I hate injections myself etc, but I think for me the overriding factor is I want to be there to a) help OH through this and b) be able to say I was there when LO was born.

We did speak to MW about this and she said they are used to dealing with oh's that are like that and that as long as I have eat & drink then I should be fine as your concentrating on something else and staying at head end.

I am determined to be there being as it is our 1st it will make me even more determined not to want to miss this.

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

I'll never forget the wide eyed terror in OH's eyes as he slid down the back wall. He intended to stay at my head, but caught the full gorefest as he nipped back in from the loo.
I dont remember much of that last push, think laughter at that sight got my second born out.

 

[massacubano]

My OH had to borrow my oxygen mask! and we had no blood involved, just three hours of pushing a sunny side up baby.

I say he should be fine. I mean he can leave if he feels sick.

 

[Rosella]

Thanks for all your posts!

 

[tucsontechsan]

I guess my OH is a weirdo then. He hates injections and can't take those at all, in fact he's a baby about them. But he has never, at least from what he has told me, been sqeemish about the birth and all that. In fact, he said he wants to try and be catcher when the next one is born. The doctor is cool with it so be it. I just need to get him a catcher's mitt now!