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Stickylizard's THAT WAS IT thread, home birth story :D (long!)

stickylizard

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WARNING this birth story is huge!

Hi all!

Well it finally happened!

Toby Isaac was born at 2.54am yesterday, Monday 30th April 2012 weighing 7lb 8.5oz :cloud9:

As many of you will know from all of my ranting, I had many, many false starts, from 39+5 losing lots of plug and having contractions which then went away when I went to sleep, to having a sweep on my due date during which I was told I was already 3cm and stretchy, which after taking the advice to have sex and walk a lot, was followed by 2 hours of regular contractions, we packed Ella off to my dad's house and the contractions stopped again, and then Saturday night (40+2) after cleaning the bathroom with a toothbrush (seriously) I had some contractions which again, stopped when I went to sleep!

So by the time Sunday morning came I had lost all hope! I decided no more walking, no more sex, no more trying anything because all that I got was false starts! So Sunday it rained all day and I spent most of it on the sofa, barr having a shower! We watched some films and I played Bubble Buster on my phone (sad little Android arcade game that I'm addicted to!), and all day from when I woke up I was having irregular contractions!! :growlmad: They ranged from 10 minutes to an hour apart and they had no pattern of length or intensity at all. Plus in between them I had lower back ache so it didn't relent. On Sundays our old friend Gil always comes over and we have an evening of playing cards and Scrabble, so we got Ella to bed, and by the time Gil arrived I was bouncing on the ball, playing Patience miserably by myself and crying because I was so fed up, and aching and tired. I was half on the edge of ringing the midwives or the hospital to see if someone would give me a sweep, or a little pessary, just SOMETHING to get labour started properly!

However, during the games (where at one point, ridiculously my Scrabble letters were R, Q, J, V, Z, G and N for those who play!) I was still contracting and I started noting down the minutes past the hour when they began, starting at 8pm and they went from 25 mins apart to 20, to 17, 13, 11, 9, 6, then every time I got up to use the bathroom because I was having loose bowels like a bitch, they would go to every 3 minutes, then I would sit back down and they'd get more sporadic! At one point there was a 22 minute gap! :wacko: It was taking ages to play cards because I kept stopping to breathe through the painful ones, and they were definitely lasting longer! Gil decided to leave us to it at about half past midnight, and I was dreading having to actually get up off the ball properly and go up to bed because any time I moved it spurred them on but I was convinced it was still a false alarm! Anyway, I got off the ball and immediately had a contraction which was really painful, got on the floor on my knees leaning over the ball. Then I rolled my way across the floor and got to the bottom of the stairs and it happened again, then got halfway up and OH was carrying the ball, the contraction hit and I slammed my face into the stair :dohh: which frigging killed haha because I forgot I was leaning on stairs not ball!

By the time I made it to the bedroom I was telling OH to let the hospital know (who let the midwives on call know because I had planned a homebirth), he did so and I was moaning lots because the contractions were every 3-4 minutes apart and I was hugging the ball for dear life! We went back downstairs because having had a quick chat to me whilst I was in pain, the midwife said to get the room ready for the birth. I wanted OH to get the room ready and the pool up really quickly, but also every time I had a contraction I was like "Don't leave meeeee!!" so he was frantically unfolding a huge sheet of waterproofing and laying down sheets etc and I was in danger of ripping down the curtains in the next room as I was gripping onto them!

There were several things I definitely learned from my first labour and the first one was when I was pulling on curtain I was crying out in pain and thinking "Oh my God it's happening, oh God, oh no, it hurts, make it stop" - then I had a stern word with myself and reminded myself that panicking makes it worse, and to accept the pain and breathe like I'd been told because it does help a bit, or rather gives something else to focus on through the pain. So I got down on the floor next to the chair and right in front of the kitchen doorway (which, helpfully for everybody, was where I pretty much stayed for the duration of my labour! :dohh:) and leaned over the ball and tried to breathe as I'd been taught, telling OH to hurry the f**k up haha.

The student midwife who I really like and had requested arrived about 1.30am and sat with me holding my hand and telling me I was doing really well, OH was faffing around with air pumps and hoses. She was really helpful and I was glad she was there! Shortly afterwards the main midwife arrived with the gas and air :happydance: but before she offered it, she asked me to lie flat on my back so she could palpate me and listen to baby's heartbeat, which I was not happy about because I wanted to stay on the ball so I told her "if you're quick!". She managed to feel my bump and then I groaned and rolled over onto the ball again for the next contraction and she checked the heartbeat, which remained about 150-160 all through my labour. She then said I could have the gas and air on the next contraction which I was so relieved at, so she handed me it and I was sucking and nothing was happening and I said "It's not working!" and she said "It is, you need to suck really hard on it", I was like "TRUST ME, IT'S NOT WORKING!!!!!" and then panicked and screamed through that contraction, whilst she figured out the canister was empty :dohh:

She attached a new one and asked me if I was feeling panicky and I said yes, so she put a drop of frankincense on my palm - now, if anyone had told me beforehand that aromatherapy oils would relax me in labour, I'd have sniggered and dismissed them, but it truly did! So I started honking back the gas and air which really made me focus on my breathing. At one point the canister ran out and had to be changed and there was another shouty moment when I suddenly realised how much it was helping me! I was asking for OH, who was standing by the sink poor bugger, the tap connector for the hose didn't fit properly so he was having to stand there holding it on and was missing most of the action! The student asked if I wanted her to swap for a bit so he could come sit with me so he did and he was telling me how proud he was and I was just shaking my head and trying to breathe through the pain. Then I just looked at him and said "Push" and his eyes went all wide and he said "Umm she wants to push"! The urge wasn't really strong but I kinda felt like I needed to pee and poo, and the student offered to take me up to the loo but I was like no way am I moving!

At about 2.30am my dad arrived following a txt I sent before even the student arrived saying along the lines of "Come pick up Ella I'm dying and Jack can't leave me now please help me" or something! He had to pack the highchair into the car through the back gate because I was still in the doorway :dohh: The midwife wanted to do an exam because of the pushing feeling but I was saying you have to wait til my dad's gone! So he got Ella (who bless her, was in her cot upstairs, awake but quiet, probably a bit bewildered by it all) and asked if I wanted to say bye and I said "Caaaaan't!!" so he left! The midwife immediately lay out a few of those plastic backed pad things and helped me out of my trousers! I leaned over the chair and she told me to my amazement that I was 8-9cm! I believe that helped me through the remainder of my labour because I was expecting her to say I was 5cm or something, and that it was going to get way way worse! Also ladies, those of you who are worried about baby being engaged, even at 9cm dilated my baby was STILL only 2/5 engaged! Madness, but just goes to show that if you're 40 weeks and not engaged it doesn't necessarily mean much :D I asked why I was wanting to push and the midwife said it is the pressure because he's trying to move down but your waters are bulging still.

I was worried that the pool was still not ready, so OH came and sat with me again and the student took over helping to fill it up and get the temperature right whilst I suddenly felt better resting back kneeling on my haunches than over the ball, and told him I was 9cm and he looked a bit shocked again. HE sat behind me and said rest on me so you don't hurt your wrists. I was saying I'm really sorry, I can't help pushing a little bit and the midwife said don't worry, do what your body is telling you. My contractions had gone to every 2 minutes and with the next one I pushed because I couldn't help it and splat, my waters broke with force onto the mat I was kneeling on and over OH's foot :haha: then I immediately felt baby's head moving down and yelled "I NEED TO PUSH!!" Right on cue, it was announced that the pool was ready and the second midwife was on her way (not sure why they need two for the end of a homebirth but hey) and I was helped to hobble into the lounge.

I got into the pool and it was immediate relief, I mean not loads cus I was about to push, but just enough to carry me through to the end! I started really getting upset then, crying to the student about how I was scared because his head was coming too fast and he was gonna tear me in half and it was gonna really hurt etc etc :dohh: and she just said, honestly, this baby is about to come out and it'll be over. The second midwife arrived whilst OH was quickly following orders to get a sieve because I pooped a little bit :blush: OH then took his place behind me so he could kiss my head and handed me the gas and air. I had a contraction and felt baby move down LOADS and was trying to actually slow it down because it was scaring me how fast he was coming and I wanted to get used to it a bit, and I was saying "I can't wait til he's out so I can have a cup of tea!". With the next contraction my body took over and I couldn't help but push with all my might and his head came out, it stung and burned but it came out, facing sideways, and with the next contraction almost immediately afterwards I pushed and with my arm around OH's neck I threw my head back and screamed in his face like a banshee and at 2.54am pushed his body out!

I felt instant relief that I had actually done it, and the midwife brought him to the surface and put him on me and I looked down and it was amazing! My son was in my arms looking a bit shocked at me and I looked at OH and he gave me a kiss and said well done, he looked proper elated as well :cloud9: I sat there for a minute and OH took a few pictures whilst we waited for the cord to stop pulsing. It took a fair few attempts for OH to actually CUT the cord because it was really strong, and then the midwife took Toby away to clean him, which is when he started crying very loudly! I was helped out of the pool, out of my top and onto the sofa and Toby was given back to me for skin to skin. They gave me the injection for the placenta and that was out in one push, much smaller than Ella's (even though Toby was only 2 ounces lighter than she was, perhaps this explains my smaller bump!) and they showed me how it worked and turned it inside out which was so disgusting but fascinating too! It was only then that I lost any blood! (For those who read any of my previous posts, all that worrying about low platelets and risk of bleeding and it was minimal!) She offered me the gas and air whilst she checked me inside for tears, then she said she needed to check up my bum for tears as well and as I knew there were small poos in the pool I said "at your peril!". :blush::haha: I was amazed considering how fast he shot out, I had NO tears or grazing and didn't need any stitches!

Then I fed Toby, who was a complete natural, and the midwives were writing up my notes, OH boiled the kettle and everyone had coffee and brownies which I made in advance specifically FOR the midwives, and I had the very last teabag which I had been after! It was then I noticed what a total mess the house was! Midwife stuff everywhere, towels, sheets, mats, entonox canisters etc. Toby was weighed and the midwives cleared their stuff up, and OH and I took him upstairs to dress him in his first outfit :cloud9:

Finally the midwife asked me to pee in a jug so she could measure how much I was weeing, then she emptied it and filled it with warm water and lavender oil, and poured it over my bits into the loo! The midwives said goodbye and congratulations and it was really surreal having the moses basket at the end of our bed again, with a baby in it! I txted my close family and sent a photo, and rang my sister who I knew was excited to know what was happening and despite it being 5am, was awake feeding her 7 week old (which means my son and my youngest nephew are exactly 7 weeks apart, and my son and my daughter are exactly a year and 3 weeks apart!). Then I fed Toby again and tried to get to sleep but I was just way too buzzed!

My dad brought Ella back later on that day and she was smiling at Toby saying "Tatatata" which was just adorable, and trying to pull his hat and mitts off! There was a tense moment when my dad tried to help empty the pool with buckets and I had to get OH to stop him before he saw the poo! He sieved out the offenders and started emptying and then my dad ordered him to "Go and spend some time with your family, I'll do this" which was really sweet!

Toby is feeding like a trooper, he's such a greedy baby! He also was asleep fine until 3am this morning when he decided cluster feeds, pooing and grizzling were in order, until I caved at 6am and let him sleep next to me in our bed because I was exhausted!

Though it is really nice to be able to pee without it stinging, the after pains this time are so much worse than last time, last night I was literally crying from the contractions feeding was giving me, I was really worried until TMI I passed a huge clot the size of my palm this morning which was probably what it was! Also the lack of stitches etc is made up for in how painful my spine is! It feels all bruised and takes me forever to move around!

And I have to say, it doesn't taste great and it clearly didn't make Toby come out any faster as he arrived at 40+4, a mere 3 hours earlier than Ella made her appearance last year, but I truly believe I owe raspberry leaf tea the world! I can't believe after such a lengthy niggly long early labour that my active labour was only 3 1/2 hours and that I pushed him out in 2 contractions - 4 minutes!

We took Ella and Toby out for the first time just to Tesco to test the new double buggy and it hit me as we were walking in and I looked down at my two babies, that oh my God, I have TWO CHILDREN! :happydance: Scary, but so so cool :]

It hurt like an absolute motherf**ker, but I wouldn't have changed my birth for anything! I am so lucky to have had the student I wanted, to have given birth in the water (I so don't care that I was barely in it for 10 minutes because just pushing him out in water was amazing), to have laboured at home and to have a healthy baby at the end of it! Last year I was so fuzzy all the way through from when I had a shot of pethidine that my memory isn't clear, and this time I felt like I was really present and connected to my body, and holding my boy in my arms for the first time is crystal clear in my mind. Given the chance, next time I would definitely have a home birth and water birth again!

Thank you ALL for your support and giggles and friendship over the last 9 (10) months, thank you to everyone who posted a cat thread or commented on mine! I wish you all safe deliveries and perfect babies!

Here's the juicy bit, a few piccies! Sorry about my crazed face in the first one, I was a little elated and delirious!

Me in the pool just after he was born
Cosy in his first outfit in the moses basket
Finally looking at us!
With Daddy just hours after birth
Looking cute in stars!
 

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I just adore the dino outfit!
And my beautiful babies, the first trip in the double buggy!
 

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Wow, huge congratulations!!:happydance::cloud9: You did a fantastic job, what a fab home birth.:thumbup:
 
Aww fab story, and Toby is gorgeous! Well done mama! xxx
 
Wow what an amazing story. Brought tears to my eyes!! Well done!!!! So proud of you. And your little man is precious!
 
Congratulations! :happydance: Was wondering about you! Great birth story :thumbup:
 
WOW! Congrats momma !!!!!:happydance: He is a handsome little man but omg the one of the two in the double buggy is just the cutest thing ever!!
 
Wow, what a wonderful birth story!! Toby is beautiful hon, I'm delighted for you!! So glad you got what sounds like a wonderful home birth xxx
 
Yay!!!!! Congratulations bumP/baby buddy! Although I already knew :) he's gorgeous xxxxx
 
awww congratulations he is bloody gorgeous
really enjoyed reading your story, made me giggle with your way of words lol
x
 
Oh wow!! well Done you! A lovely lovely Home birth story. he is blooming gorgeous xxxx
 
Aww he is lovely!! Loved reading your story, made me laugh! I am even more excited for my homebirth too so thank you! xx
 
Congratulations, so pleased for you and thanks for sharing your birth story.

It wasnt too long, it was great having so much detail xx

Toby is gorgeous - enjoy :flower:
 

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