stuck between a rock and a hard place :/

[teenmommy15]

hey guys. so i had an ultrasound today and it went great!
This is the first ultrasound my boyfriend(the father) has came to!
I was so thrilled that he finally saw our little girl since these last couple of months have been rocky cause of his mom.
My mom doesnt like marcus just because she's a bit disgusted that he got me pregnant and hasnt really stepped up to the plate fully yet and i say she's even more worried. i understand where she comes from cause im sure she see's me and him and just imagines us ..
The scan was a bit awkward but we got through it and it went fine i guess.
But when me and my mom got in the car we were talking about where i was planning to go with him from here and she understands that i want his support but she says all the support i need is from her.
I told her that i wanted him to be at the baby shower and she doesnt want him their but she doesnt have a problem cause she knows i want him their but she doesnt know how my grandma will feel around him.
And im just stuck between my family and they family that ive created.
My mom understands that its hard for me and she's not asking me to choose but its hard being with in the position that im in. i just want to go away and not deal with anything .. but thats not the way to go soo ..

 

[jozylynn896]

I don't really have any advice but hopefully eventually he steps uoto his mother. Like something along the lines of "you're not gonna stop me from seeing my child."

 

[jozylynn896]

It is a bit unfair that he can't go to the shower because well he is the father. But I think your mom just wants to look out for you because you're her baby and she doesn't want some punk screwing your life up.

 

[teenmommy15]

he can still goto the shower it will just make the adults feel uncomfortable. but yeah i see where everyones coming from but its still so hard to make a decision. Thanks

 

[ClairAye]

People are going to have to suck it up and get used to him being around!

I used to HATE being around my parents (more my dad) with OH, now him and my dad get on like a house on fire haha my dad even makes me do stuff for him when we're there! They all need to realise that he is part of this too, I'm sure it will get better

 

[xforuiholdonx]

He is your childs father regardless of whether or not your family dislikes him or the fact that he gor you pregnant. Who do they think you are going to want in the deivery room, hokding your.hand, seeing your child for the first time? They need to get over it and learn to deal with him.

 

[teenmommy15]

i know they do but i hate telling my mom she just needs to suck it up. My mom went through the same thing with my dad now my dad was a great father but not the best decision maker and could never stand up for my mom and his family. My boyfriend is EXACTLY like my father. and i would love for my daughter to have a father like i did but the reality of it is my father was horrible at keeping promises, decisions,sticking up for his family and being counted on. i talked to marcus about and i hope he changes. and when i told my mom i want him in the delivery room she said she didnt want to be their and i said if you loved me and really wanted to give me support then you'd be their and get over the fact that marcus is there.

 

[xforuiholdonx]

Thats kind of immature of your mom!! I understand where she is coming from, but you cant change the father of a.child, so as much as you dont want want to.tell her to suck it up, you may have too. Its not about.her, and she should not be putting her feeings before yours.

 

[magic93]

I totally understand why your mom feels that way after all you are her baby. But at the same time if your OH needs to step up, one of the first steps he can take to show that hes there for you and your daughter is being part of your baby shower! Your family will be ok in the end once they see some progress. I sure hope your OH gives you and your LO the respect and support you need from him. But the fact he wants to be at the baby shower is a good sign and he should not be denied his own daughters baby shower. He is a part of your family now, and your a part of his, and thats something botb your families will have to come to accept.