Starry Night
4 angels, 2 rainbows
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I am starting to feel guilty about high-jacking the August Testing Thread so I'll post my little rant here:
My post mc cycles are really screwy! And I mean screwy! My first AF came about 26 days after my mc and the period itself was weird. It was fairly stop and start for 10 days but I had a few clots and filled tampons and I expected some weirdness so it didn't throw me off too much. But my 2nd AF came only 18 days later. At first I thought it was only break-through bleeding and it had stopped when I saw my gp. My AF came the next day (of course). And it was weeeeird. It was the start and stop stuff again but much lighter. I felt like I was about to gush or it felt like passing clots but nothing came on the toilet or even when I wiped.
Now it happened again. I was getting very painful cramps that were almost as bad as when I miscarried and my boobs hurt so bad I felt like they were going to explode off my chest. So I saw my gp again. My blood work from the previous visit came back clear and my post mc ultrasound had been clear so my doctor saw no reason to be concerned. The NEXT DAY my AF came again! So now I've had two 18 Day cycles in a row!!! And the bleeding is weeeird. It's intermittant spotting that ranges from brown to bright red to maroon in colour. But It only shows when I wipe or when I put in a tampon. Last night I could feel my cervix opening and closing as if I were passing a clot but nothing. The cramps aren't so bad right now but my boobs hurt and I've been peeing like a racehorse.
My gp had wanted me to wait and see what happens and to come back if I get more weird bleeding so she could refer me to my gynacologist. I think this qualifies!!!! This whole melodramatic affair is seriously making me regress emotionally!!!
I thought I had accepted my baby's loss and was even getting excited about meeting my future babies. But now I'm furious with the world and everything in it and keep dwelling on how swollen my belly should be now. That people should be asking me if I'm getting excited yet instead of avoiding my eyes when I talk about having kids someday (seriously, you have one miscarriage and suddenly people think you need to let go of your parenting dreams....)
I hate my body right now but I'm scared the doctor will continue to tell me to "wait and see". I'm tired of waiting! I just want to get better so I can move on!! And having only 8 day of no bleeding between AFs is really taking a toll on me! Too much PMS!!! I'm willing to go through a D&C to make it all stop but I'm scared to have one....
My post mc cycles are really screwy! And I mean screwy! My first AF came about 26 days after my mc and the period itself was weird. It was fairly stop and start for 10 days but I had a few clots and filled tampons and I expected some weirdness so it didn't throw me off too much. But my 2nd AF came only 18 days later. At first I thought it was only break-through bleeding and it had stopped when I saw my gp. My AF came the next day (of course). And it was weeeeird. It was the start and stop stuff again but much lighter. I felt like I was about to gush or it felt like passing clots but nothing came on the toilet or even when I wiped.
Now it happened again. I was getting very painful cramps that were almost as bad as when I miscarried and my boobs hurt so bad I felt like they were going to explode off my chest. So I saw my gp again. My blood work from the previous visit came back clear and my post mc ultrasound had been clear so my doctor saw no reason to be concerned. The NEXT DAY my AF came again! So now I've had two 18 Day cycles in a row!!! And the bleeding is weeeird. It's intermittant spotting that ranges from brown to bright red to maroon in colour. But It only shows when I wipe or when I put in a tampon. Last night I could feel my cervix opening and closing as if I were passing a clot but nothing. The cramps aren't so bad right now but my boobs hurt and I've been peeing like a racehorse.
My gp had wanted me to wait and see what happens and to come back if I get more weird bleeding so she could refer me to my gynacologist. I think this qualifies!!!! This whole melodramatic affair is seriously making me regress emotionally!!!
I thought I had accepted my baby's loss and was even getting excited about meeting my future babies. But now I'm furious with the world and everything in it and keep dwelling on how swollen my belly should be now. That people should be asking me if I'm getting excited yet instead of avoiding my eyes when I talk about having kids someday (seriously, you have one miscarriage and suddenly people think you need to let go of your parenting dreams....)I hate my body right now but I'm scared the doctor will continue to tell me to "wait and see". I'm tired of waiting! I just want to get better so I can move on!! And having only 8 day of no bleeding between AFs is really taking a toll on me! Too much PMS!!! I'm willing to go through a D&C to make it all stop but I'm scared to have one....
