Such a dreadful 37wk checkup... Just unreal!

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Really need a vent on this one.... I feel my drs office was out of line today..... Am I over reacting ?

1st off.... Every apt the nurse asks me if I'm getting the dtap or flu shot and every apt I decline and remind her why.... With my first son I did not vaccinate while pregnant and he was born so healthy and happy,, my second I vaccinated while pregnant and he was born with severe health issues from digestive to skin cancer surgeries.... We lived in the hopital for 2 yrs .... I can't help but wonder if it had anything to do wth the shots.... I just rather NOT take the chance this time around .... Also my son with the health issues also had a horrid reaction to Dtap a few months ago and landed him in the er and admitted in the hospital.... I'm just terrified for baby or me to have some reaction while pregnant . After watching my son go through so much I just can't ..... I'm a firm believer In vaccinating my
Children.... Just outside the womb that is....
Now this is my decision based off my personal , I'd assume very understandable circumstances ....
Well my nurse is so rude and blows it off, rolls her eyes, tells me it's just a shot, and continues to ask each and every visit and tells me I really need to discuss this with the dr, which I never do because its my personal decision as a mother .... Wtf .... Then my dr today tells me "you worry too much" over the whole situation!. I left there sobbing ..... Feeling so betrayed by my dr whom delivered all of my babies, who I trust and expect to respect me and my values as a mother and patient.....
I felt like the worst mother on earth today and it's not right!


2nd .....Lets just top it all off with ....baby was engaged last check 2 wks ago.... And now his head is floating around and dr couldn't even reach to check my cervix today..... How is that .... Whyyyyyyy...... I have contractions daily 24/7. Such a lousy apt

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

I'm sorry you had such a rough appointment!

I wasn't even offered the DTAP vaccine until post-birth. And that was through the Cleveland Clinic system, which is one of the best in the country. Just remember your reasons, and you'll be done with that office soon enough!

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Thanks for the vent sess and response..... I live in MI..... I have told them several times I will get both shots in the hospital right after I deliver if they feel it's that necessary .... I'm fine with post delivery shots, they are just so disrespectful so disappointed in them

 

[ashleypauline]

I heard with subsequent pregnancies babies can engage and disengage all the way up,to labor ��. And I was told I was a fingertip, then closed, then a fingertip, then only dilated to 1 on the outside, then closed, now I'm open completely and almost 2cm

 

[Christinee]

Dr's can be morans sometimes... I am not happy with mine either. I wish i could switch but I am so far along its kind of late for that. I feel brushed off and hurried at every appt.

 

[Julesillini8]

I got my dtap in the hospital before I was discharged after delivery. You said you were possibly open to that, so I don't see why they are making a big deal of it and pestering you about it now. I don't feel that's professional or appropriate of them. If it were me, I would tell them that, haha but that's me and my mouth! "lay off fools, I'll do it after I deliver, make a note of that so you don't ask me again or I'll shove that needle where the sun don't shine."
I'll be happy to tell them this for you if you want

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Haha thanks! That's exactly what I wanted to tell them... Shove it up theirs as see how that feels..... Ugh!!! Right , I have told the nurse every single apt ill get it after baby.... Why she must ask " so have u decided to get the shots today?" No.... No I did not change my mind to satisfy you ... Wth! I wonder if they just get a lot of money for each shot givin or what the deal is :/

On the bright side.... My exam hurt like hell, said he couldn't reach enough to properly check for dilation.... But I lost some plug throughout the night and been super crampy with loads of BH .... Wishful thinking that maybe he actually stirred things up in there.... Just trying to be positive lol ! Bad bad day:/

 

[Julesillini8]

Aw. Maybe baby will be born before your next appt so you won't have to deal with them too much more!

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Ahhh! That would be wonderful! Fingers crossed for that!

 

[HappyBump25]

Ugh! I would seriously talk to your doctor about that nurse's attitude! I mean, what does it even matter now that you're 37 weeks?!

I'm mad for you. It's really none of her business if you don't want a flu shot. I'm pro-vaccination as well, but I don't do the flu shot. I don't see the point in taking a vaccine that isn't even fool-proof. This year it was, what? 20% effective?

I'd seriously talk to your doctor about this. It's harassment if she refuses to drop the subject.

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Thanks for the support !! I know that's exactly how I feel.... Perfect word : harassed ! The worst part is..... My family worked for this dr for yrs..... After my last son I had to change OB due to ins.... When I got preg this time 5 yr later I ditched the nice lady on I switched to , just to go back to this one... I got cold feet delivering with someone else and a diff hospital, and kinda felt obligated also..... :/ guess this is my karma

 

[skyesmom]

nah stop bashing yourself about changing doctors, anyone in your situation after the experience with your second son would go back to the old doctor. if i were in your place and the nurse would ask me if i'm ready for my shot today, i'd ask her if she heard the bullying of a patient into something that was potentially clearly damaging for them and the baby is called medical malpractice.

she's got no rights to treat you like that! but sometimes they just don't get it you know. for them it is just one of those things they say randomly without really giving it a thought on how it comes thru to you.

 

[Pandora0814]

I just had my 37 week check-up too. My doctor made me so mad as well. I’ve been going to weekly appointments since 35 weeks. She checked me for dilation and did the swab at 35 week appt and said I was a strong 1 cm dilated.

I came back at 36 weeks and she did absolutely nothing but ask me “who scheduled a sonogram today”. I informed her that she scheduled it last appointment due to me not measuring big in the belly. She never checked me for dilation at 36 week appointment just told me that she will see me next week.

I just had my appointment for 37 week and not only did I wait for an hour (when I could have been at work) but she walked in said everything must be good. Vital were all good and that she would see me next week…

I LOST IT!! I informed her that she had not checked me for dilation for 2 weeks now (even though sometimes it doesn’t really mean much) but that was what my first OB did with my first born. She then told me that she would do a dilation check at 39 weeks. I then felt the need to remind her that my son was born at 38 week and I wanted to be checked to at least see if anything was happening. After all this, she changed her mind and informed me that she would check me at my next appt (38 weeks)… I then proceeded to tell her of how if nothing was happening that I would like to be induced at 39 weeks by my own personal preference.

She was not thrilled by the idea. My pregnancy has been very normal except for my lapband that at times makes it a little more intense. She told me that we would take about it but she would rather induced at 41 week if no signs of the baby by then. I did get smart with her and told her “I wish to schedule an induction for 39 weeks. I feel that because I am not high risk that you send me on my way faster and that makes me feel inadequate.” She, of course, denied this and said one again that we will talk about this next week.

So as you can see, I too have a bad 37 week appointment.

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Skysmom thanks! Maybe She just doesn't get it and I took it to heart ... I don't know, I think I was up all night because I was just feeling so worked up over it all.... Damn hormones!!! I do know this much, once baby is born and after I have my 6wk checkup.... I'm definitely out of there! And then I will send in a letter of how disappointed I am with their staff after all the trust and years I put into them... 3 kids later and this is how I leave ..... Their US tech is just aweful, nasty attitude, she has put me to tears saying such unnecessary scary things and has done the same to other women I know, I left with bruises on my stomach once, literally visible bruises ..... Unreal

Pandora I'm so sorry to hear about your aweful apt also yuck to 37wks!! Hopefully you be lucky enough to go on your own in the next wk or so did u naturly go into labor last time around? I feel like drs need to bed over backwards to please their ob patients.... Of course they should look out for their best interests , but a birth plan is a personal choice they should respect, even the part of knowing if there's progress, sometimes a heads up is very necessary! Especially if u have kids to find sitters for and etc.... Where is the bedside manner these days?!

 

[StillPraying]

How sad that prenatal care has basically just become a business! I'm sorry you had such a terrible appointment. There really is no respect for personal opinions/choices as parents anymore. I got the same reaction when I refused to have my DD's shots given all at once (6 shots for a 6 week old?!). I'm not against vaccines, I just want them spread out.
I honestly feel like my appointments are pointless and a waste of my time. I told the nurse at my last appointment that I had gone into preterm labor at 27 weeks and that I was concerned about not making it to at least 37 weeks and she brushed it off saying "if you didn't dilate theres nothing to worry about." wtf?

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Wow , that's a rediculous statement !!! Seriously they have some nerve. It's just unreal! Im with you on spacing them out, my one son gets reactions, I vaccinate but I refuse to give them all at once... For several reasons .... I agree about it all becoming soley business and money. Forget the patients and binding over life experiences with them....

 

[Monzter79]

The vaccine issue is SOOO super contentious right now. I'm not anti either. I DO however have an autoimmune disease and a STRONG family history of autoimmune disease... And my husband was just diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis. I plan on vaccinating, but I'd like a slower and more conservative approach. I feel like that's a very reasonable and sane decision on my part.

I have felt pigeonholed and judged as one of "those people". I've seen the eye rolls and I know what people think. But, they're basing it on a general opinion that they have without considering that certain individuals have very good reasons for their choices. It's really unfortunate. But, I'm not going to base my choices on stigma and nonsense (from EITHER side).

Your nurse should've been more professional. You went through A LOT. Any mother would share your concerns after experiencing something like that. You're not being alarmist IMO.

People need to stop with the crazy judgment. Yes, the world is round... But things aren't ALWAYS black or white.

Sorry for what you experienced.

 

[StillPraying]

It feels like there are too many fear mongers on both ends, it's so exhausting. If you want a natural birth you're a crazy hippy but if you want an epidural in a hospital you're selfish and drugging your baby

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Well said ladies !!! It is so black and white these days.... And it's just sad! Monsterz sorry to hear about the autoimmune diseases and the arthritis I don't blame you one bit for spacing out either ! StillPraying haha so true .... Damned if you do, damned if you don't..... The past 2 yrs I have switched over to clean eating for the most part and try my best to fight off colds and health issues with holistic remedies .... I have seen a lot turn around and amazed by what natural remedies can do...which made me want to go into this labor with a different approach and drug free... ( had epidurals and horrid back labor with both ) .... Now the end is near and I already feel him pushing hard into my spine/tailbone when I get contractions .... Already see the back labor coming..... Best believe ill be taking that epidural ASAP once I give up half way through haha..... I won't hate myself either .... It is what it is !

 

[Perplexed]

The nurse's comments would piss me off to no end! I can't believe they're treating you like that. It's your choice if you want to vaccinate right now or not! We aren't offered any vaccinations during pregnancy around here but I do refuse the flu shot for my daughter (which my daughter completely disregarded and gave it to her at her next vaccinations appointment when another family member had taken her). I also don't see how helpful your Dr thinks s/he is being by saying you worry too much...they have to take your experiences with your 2nd child seriously. If it makes you more comfortable not to take the vaccines then they should understand and respect that!