southernbound
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**** warning! If you are looking for positive birth stories I strongly recommend you do not read on. I am not trying to scare anyone, and truth be told it wasn't all that terrible in retrospect but I just want to document it while I remember everything****
Ok! Well my due date came and passed.... and passed farther away with each day and still no baby. I had a natural birth plan. I had looked into hypnobirthing, planned relaxation techniques and had a baby friendly hospital lined up. No WAY was I going to get an epidural or give birth flat on my back. I spent much of my high school time living in a midwifery clinic in the phillipenes, I'd seen countless babies born naturally. No big deal.
At 41+5 I went to my routine doctors appointment. She checked my cervix, and said I was at 3 cm but that my feet were swollen and she was worried about that, worried the baby was too big, worried that the placenta was calcifying and just generally insisted I could not be pregnant another day. She sent me across the street to the hospital ( a different one than the one I had planned, the one I had planned was too far) to be induced. Disappointed but concerned for my babys health I went. By about 10 Am Nov 21st I was in a bed with an IV, contraction monitor, and heart monitor attached exactly like I didn't want but it was fine. As it turned out I was already in labor and contracting every three minutes, no pitocin needed. "Is that what those are?" I thought. The contractions didn't hurt in the slightest. The anesthesiologist came in to have my sign consent forms. He said very confidently "I'll see you in a few hours". I smiled and told him I wasn't planning on getting an epidural. He outright laughed at me and said "sure sure, that's what they all say. See you in a while." At that moment I made it my mission in life to not get an epidural no matter what for no reason other than to spite him.
Shortly after that the nurse came in and started messing with my IV. I asked what she was doing and she said "adminstering pitocin". "But I'm already in labor". She said as nicely as possible "this was on the doctors orders, I'm just following them". Of course, I let it happen. Within an hour contractions were getting a little more intense but still very manageable. I begged to be allowed to walk around but was told I couldn't get up with the monitors on. I finally ignored them and put my birthing ball next to the bed and bounced on it for about an hour while the nurse huffed around me trying to keep the monitors in place. Around 7 pm that night my OB came in to check on me. I had only progressed to 4 cm so she broke my water and told the nurse to up the pitocin. Almost immediately contractions started coming 30 seconds apart, a new one peaking before the previous one had stopped and it was entirely back labor. No pain in my front at all. I told the nurse the baby was facing the wrong way and she said "No hes not, sometimes a little back pain happens". After that the next several hours were a blur of agony. I felt like I was being torn apart. I remember everything looking blurry and dark no matter how they adjusted the lighting and according to my husband I begged for him to kill me and sobbed uncontrollably. I also vaguely remember asking the nurse if I could change positions to something other than being on my back and being told absolutely not, not after the water had broken. If I tried to lay on my side someone would come in and push me back onto my back. I wanted to move so badly. After the fact several of my friends mentioned that they couldn't believe I texted them during labor. I have zero memory of anything I said or ever asking for my phone. Finally around midnight the nurse checked me again and I hadn't progressed at all. At this point she begged me to take the epidural. She said my blood pressure was through the roof from pain and the contractions were just too fast and too hard to let my body relax and open up and they had to do something to slow them down. I said no. She took my husband aside and when he came back he said "Please get an epidural. I know you wanted natural but natural went out the window with pitocin, you can't be expected to continue like this". I gave in and said yes. The aforementioned anesthesiologist came in smirking and said something along the lines of "I knew you couldn't hack it". I sat up and the nurse handed me a pillow to hug. I couldn't stop crying and he snapped at me and said "Crying will do you no good, suck it up. They call it labor for a reason it's not fun stop being a baby". At this point my husband yelled something at him, I don't remember what but I'm sure it was profane. He said he would insert the needle between contractions, the nurse explained there was currently no such thing as between contractions so he went ahead and inserted it and I was told I would feel better within 20 mins and he left. 30 mins went by and nothing happened. The nurse asked me to try to move my legs and I still had full control over my body with the exception of a slight tingling in my left thigh. She went to get the anesthesiologist and he came in, glared at me and said "If it failed it failed, you probably have sculliosis, what do you want me to do?". I told him that I didn't call him the nurse did and he could kindly @#$# off. He left again. Now I was contracting non stop, AND had a catheter in my back and at this point was just about ready to plead for c-section. About 1am the nurse checked me again and lo and behold I was at 8 cms. She called my doctor, the doctor showed up and told the nurses I could start pushing and she'd be back. A second and third nurse showed up and put my feet in stirrups and told me to push. The second nurse kept "massaging" and stretching me non stop and it hurt so bad and was so distracting. I kept asking her to stop and she'd say I was delusional and she was helping me and I'd thank her later when I didn't tear. She also yelled at me to be quiet when I groaned while pushing and said it was wasting energy and to put that energy into pushing better. The third nurse would scold me and tell me not to push when the monitor showed the contraction hadn't peaked even when I could feel it was and had the horrible urge to push. Not pushing was agony. They still had me flat on my back and kept saying after every push that the baby was sliding back down my tail bone. I remember lifting my head and snapping "If my tail bones in the way then why won't you let me move into a position where its not?". They ignored me and by that time another contraction had started and I was just too tired to argue with anyone about anything. I asked the nurse again to please get her fingers out of my and she wouldn't. They said the baby was sunny side up (as I had said earlier) and was stuck and that I would tear badly. Finally after 3 hours of pushing the nurse said he was crowning and ran to get the doctor. The doctor came in and by that point I was falling asleep between pushes and could barely hold my head up so she asked if I wanted help and I think I remember nodding. They vacuumed the baby out while I pushed and at 4:52 am Gavin Ashwin Oslund was born. They put him on my stomach and the doctor kept saying look at your baby! I tried to pull him towards me, I had wanted skin to skin time and to nurse immediately. My husband cut the cord and I asked him to hand him to me but the nurse took him over to the table to be cleaned up while my doctor stitched me. I had minor tears in both directions. Nothing too bad. I looked over and asked for them to please give him to me unswaddled for skin to skin time. They ignored me and swaddled him anyways. My tears were fairly jagged and stitching was taking a long time and the doctor kept saying I promise you can hold your baby when I'm done. The nurse was getting impatient and kept saying "She can wait, I need to take him to the nursery to be weighed". I started crying and saying please please let me hold my baby don't take him yet. My doctor finally snapped at the nurse and told her she could cool her jets and wait for me to be stitched and if she left the room with the baby it would cost her her job. Finally stitching was done and I got to hold my beautiful son for a few minutes, still swaddled before they took him away to be weighed. They said that it would only take a minute and he would meet me in my post delivery room. They didn't bring him to me for an hour. When I finally had him in the room with me they asked if I wanted to see a lactation consultant. I said no, the idea of another person touching me was just too much right then but thankfully Gavin nursed perfectly right away and everything was going great. He had a near perfect APGAR, his pediatrician came to do his first check up and said he was extremely healthy and thriving. That afternoon and night in the hospital was frustrating for all the normal hospital reasons. Loud, bright, constant intrusions but the nurses were fantastic and we were just so in love with our boy.
The next morning the nurse told my husband to get the car seat ready for inspection because the pediatrician was on his way to discharge the baby. The peditrician showed up and asked us to sit down. Our hearts sank. He explained that Gavin's routine blood work came back showing high secondary biliruben and that it was very rare and they weren't sure what was causing it but we wouldn't be taking him home for a long time. The NICU staff came and picked up the baby we thought we were about to take home and he was admitted. After 5 days of nuclear liver tests, blood work, ultrasounds and X-rays our hospital here in west Texas said they decided they didn't have the technology or skill to diagnose his condition and he was airlifted to Dallas Childrens Medical Center. After another 5 days of testing there he was diagnosed with a rare condition called biliary atresia and had surgery to create a bypass to his liver out of his small intestine (Kasai procedure). He'll likely need a liver transplant sometime in childhood but at 3 weeks old we finally got to bring him home and now at almost 3 months old he is doing wonderfully.
In the end, it was all worth it. He's a wonderful baby and the light of our lives. If you would like any information on biliary atresia feel free to private message me
If you made it this far, thanks for reading! Sorry for the length
Ok! Well my due date came and passed.... and passed farther away with each day and still no baby. I had a natural birth plan. I had looked into hypnobirthing, planned relaxation techniques and had a baby friendly hospital lined up. No WAY was I going to get an epidural or give birth flat on my back. I spent much of my high school time living in a midwifery clinic in the phillipenes, I'd seen countless babies born naturally. No big deal.
At 41+5 I went to my routine doctors appointment. She checked my cervix, and said I was at 3 cm but that my feet were swollen and she was worried about that, worried the baby was too big, worried that the placenta was calcifying and just generally insisted I could not be pregnant another day. She sent me across the street to the hospital ( a different one than the one I had planned, the one I had planned was too far) to be induced. Disappointed but concerned for my babys health I went. By about 10 Am Nov 21st I was in a bed with an IV, contraction monitor, and heart monitor attached exactly like I didn't want but it was fine. As it turned out I was already in labor and contracting every three minutes, no pitocin needed. "Is that what those are?" I thought. The contractions didn't hurt in the slightest. The anesthesiologist came in to have my sign consent forms. He said very confidently "I'll see you in a few hours". I smiled and told him I wasn't planning on getting an epidural. He outright laughed at me and said "sure sure, that's what they all say. See you in a while." At that moment I made it my mission in life to not get an epidural no matter what for no reason other than to spite him.
Shortly after that the nurse came in and started messing with my IV. I asked what she was doing and she said "adminstering pitocin". "But I'm already in labor". She said as nicely as possible "this was on the doctors orders, I'm just following them". Of course, I let it happen. Within an hour contractions were getting a little more intense but still very manageable. I begged to be allowed to walk around but was told I couldn't get up with the monitors on. I finally ignored them and put my birthing ball next to the bed and bounced on it for about an hour while the nurse huffed around me trying to keep the monitors in place. Around 7 pm that night my OB came in to check on me. I had only progressed to 4 cm so she broke my water and told the nurse to up the pitocin. Almost immediately contractions started coming 30 seconds apart, a new one peaking before the previous one had stopped and it was entirely back labor. No pain in my front at all. I told the nurse the baby was facing the wrong way and she said "No hes not, sometimes a little back pain happens". After that the next several hours were a blur of agony. I felt like I was being torn apart. I remember everything looking blurry and dark no matter how they adjusted the lighting and according to my husband I begged for him to kill me and sobbed uncontrollably. I also vaguely remember asking the nurse if I could change positions to something other than being on my back and being told absolutely not, not after the water had broken. If I tried to lay on my side someone would come in and push me back onto my back. I wanted to move so badly. After the fact several of my friends mentioned that they couldn't believe I texted them during labor. I have zero memory of anything I said or ever asking for my phone. Finally around midnight the nurse checked me again and I hadn't progressed at all. At this point she begged me to take the epidural. She said my blood pressure was through the roof from pain and the contractions were just too fast and too hard to let my body relax and open up and they had to do something to slow them down. I said no. She took my husband aside and when he came back he said "Please get an epidural. I know you wanted natural but natural went out the window with pitocin, you can't be expected to continue like this". I gave in and said yes. The aforementioned anesthesiologist came in smirking and said something along the lines of "I knew you couldn't hack it". I sat up and the nurse handed me a pillow to hug. I couldn't stop crying and he snapped at me and said "Crying will do you no good, suck it up. They call it labor for a reason it's not fun stop being a baby". At this point my husband yelled something at him, I don't remember what but I'm sure it was profane. He said he would insert the needle between contractions, the nurse explained there was currently no such thing as between contractions so he went ahead and inserted it and I was told I would feel better within 20 mins and he left. 30 mins went by and nothing happened. The nurse asked me to try to move my legs and I still had full control over my body with the exception of a slight tingling in my left thigh. She went to get the anesthesiologist and he came in, glared at me and said "If it failed it failed, you probably have sculliosis, what do you want me to do?". I told him that I didn't call him the nurse did and he could kindly @#$# off. He left again. Now I was contracting non stop, AND had a catheter in my back and at this point was just about ready to plead for c-section. About 1am the nurse checked me again and lo and behold I was at 8 cms. She called my doctor, the doctor showed up and told the nurses I could start pushing and she'd be back. A second and third nurse showed up and put my feet in stirrups and told me to push. The second nurse kept "massaging" and stretching me non stop and it hurt so bad and was so distracting. I kept asking her to stop and she'd say I was delusional and she was helping me and I'd thank her later when I didn't tear. She also yelled at me to be quiet when I groaned while pushing and said it was wasting energy and to put that energy into pushing better. The third nurse would scold me and tell me not to push when the monitor showed the contraction hadn't peaked even when I could feel it was and had the horrible urge to push. Not pushing was agony. They still had me flat on my back and kept saying after every push that the baby was sliding back down my tail bone. I remember lifting my head and snapping "If my tail bones in the way then why won't you let me move into a position where its not?". They ignored me and by that time another contraction had started and I was just too tired to argue with anyone about anything. I asked the nurse again to please get her fingers out of my and she wouldn't. They said the baby was sunny side up (as I had said earlier) and was stuck and that I would tear badly. Finally after 3 hours of pushing the nurse said he was crowning and ran to get the doctor. The doctor came in and by that point I was falling asleep between pushes and could barely hold my head up so she asked if I wanted help and I think I remember nodding. They vacuumed the baby out while I pushed and at 4:52 am Gavin Ashwin Oslund was born. They put him on my stomach and the doctor kept saying look at your baby! I tried to pull him towards me, I had wanted skin to skin time and to nurse immediately. My husband cut the cord and I asked him to hand him to me but the nurse took him over to the table to be cleaned up while my doctor stitched me. I had minor tears in both directions. Nothing too bad. I looked over and asked for them to please give him to me unswaddled for skin to skin time. They ignored me and swaddled him anyways. My tears were fairly jagged and stitching was taking a long time and the doctor kept saying I promise you can hold your baby when I'm done. The nurse was getting impatient and kept saying "She can wait, I need to take him to the nursery to be weighed". I started crying and saying please please let me hold my baby don't take him yet. My doctor finally snapped at the nurse and told her she could cool her jets and wait for me to be stitched and if she left the room with the baby it would cost her her job. Finally stitching was done and I got to hold my beautiful son for a few minutes, still swaddled before they took him away to be weighed. They said that it would only take a minute and he would meet me in my post delivery room. They didn't bring him to me for an hour. When I finally had him in the room with me they asked if I wanted to see a lactation consultant. I said no, the idea of another person touching me was just too much right then but thankfully Gavin nursed perfectly right away and everything was going great. He had a near perfect APGAR, his pediatrician came to do his first check up and said he was extremely healthy and thriving. That afternoon and night in the hospital was frustrating for all the normal hospital reasons. Loud, bright, constant intrusions but the nurses were fantastic and we were just so in love with our boy.
The next morning the nurse told my husband to get the car seat ready for inspection because the pediatrician was on his way to discharge the baby. The peditrician showed up and asked us to sit down. Our hearts sank. He explained that Gavin's routine blood work came back showing high secondary biliruben and that it was very rare and they weren't sure what was causing it but we wouldn't be taking him home for a long time. The NICU staff came and picked up the baby we thought we were about to take home and he was admitted. After 5 days of nuclear liver tests, blood work, ultrasounds and X-rays our hospital here in west Texas said they decided they didn't have the technology or skill to diagnose his condition and he was airlifted to Dallas Childrens Medical Center. After another 5 days of testing there he was diagnosed with a rare condition called biliary atresia and had surgery to create a bypass to his liver out of his small intestine (Kasai procedure). He'll likely need a liver transplant sometime in childhood but at 3 weeks old we finally got to bring him home and now at almost 3 months old he is doing wonderfully.
In the end, it was all worth it. He's a wonderful baby and the light of our lives. If you would like any information on biliary atresia feel free to private message me
If you made it this far, thanks for reading! Sorry for the length 
