surname help plz

[Katielaura]

Really dont know what to do
heres the background of it all . im 19 got 2 kids my first nathan is not my partners son and does not have my last name he has his fathers.(altho i dont think i justify calling him that lol) i havent been to register my second child yet which is my partners child only because i dont know what surname to use.

i would like to change nathans surname to mine , but then it would only give his biological father more of an exscuse to not see him. he claims he wants to see him yet only bothers to contact me about it every so often and to be honest i dont think these bi monthly visits are benefiting nathan in anyway.

so i could change his name to jackson which is my surname or change it to jackson-bayle or bayle-jackson to save my ex giving the exscuse that i dont want him to see his son which is far from the truth . and then give my second child either jackson or jackson- newman or newman-jackson so they all tie in so that nathan isnt the odd 1 out if u get what i mean dont know which sounds better 1st childs first names are nathan john and 2nd childs is talia grace .

i should also mention i just got engaged to my second childs father so i dunno if she should have my name and then when we do get married in the distant future she could take his , but then it still leaves me with the problem of my first child being left out

sorry for rambling and confusing you but id b greatful of your opinions she is 7 weeks now so already over the date she should be registed at but i just dont know what last name to give her xxxxx

 

[faun]

I gave both my kids their fathers surname they have different dads i am now married to my second childs dad with another on the way. My son is 9 and has asked why he has a different surname and asked if he can change it to be the same as his sisters but legally we can't change his surname without his dads permission and there is no way he would agree to that, then he will have to do it by deed poll so his birth certificate will always have the surname he was registered with. For more infomation go to https://www.childrenslegalcentre.co...gingachildssurname/changingachildssurname.htm

 

[Katielaura]

i just dont see the point in him still having his fathers name when he wont even know him. if he made an effort for his son then id be happy with keeping his name the same but i feel he has the identity of a man he doesnt and wont ever know more than he does with me thanks for the link i had a look think the laws are slightly different on the isle of man tho xxx

 

[nikky0907]

Why don't you double-barrel both last names?
That way they both have the bond (your last name) and the other one will be their dads.

Except, since Nathans dad doesn't really deserve the privilage(he's not taking responsibiity and being a dad is much more than what he's doing) you can change it to just yours-Bayle and Talia can have both yours and her dads last names.

My daughter has two last names and if I ever have another child with another man he/she will also have both...
When you and your partner get married you can double barrel yours too and not fully change it?

 

[Katielaura]

ye i think that would be for the best which way round do u think sounds better? jackson-bayle or bayle-jackson & newman-jackson or jackson-newman ? i heard the mothers name is ment to go first ???