Taking 4 month old to restaurant?

[KatO79]

So my DH's grandmother is having a birthday celebration at a restaurant and we're of course invited. I think it's family only and it's only for a lunch I think before we go to her house for the rest of the day. I'm sure she'll want to see her Great Grandson but how do you take a 4 month old (which he'll be by February 4th) to a restaurant? What about sleeping arrangements, although I fear he won't sleep if it's noisy, especially as we sometimes have a hard enough time getting him to sleep at home I also breastfeed so not sure what to do about that either

We don't really have anyone who could watch him for those hours btw!

 

[CRWx]

I don't see why not? I take and took my DD pretty much everywhere with me and it's never been a problem! Breastfeeding is breastfeeding, if your son gets hungry then feed him! xx

 

[jessmke]

My daughter has been going to restaurants regularly since she was 3 weeks old. Take the car seat into the restaurant with you and baby can nap in that, or in a wrap if you have one. Our car seat rocks so it we would just put her in it and rock her to sleep. You could also go for a walk outside with baby in the stroller to get him to fall asleep if he is being difficult in the restaurant and then bring the stroller into the restaurant with you and let him nap in that, they should let you bring a stroller in unless it's a super fancy place. I always just breastfed my daughter as normal when we were out in public, but if you feel uncomfortable nursing in public you could use a nursing cover or go out and sit in your car to nurse. Some places have a nursing area in the bathroom. But then you'll miss out on visiting with your family so I would suggest just nursing your baby at the table. I have a bunch of nursing tops which allow for very discreet nursing.

 

[KatO79]

Only problem is my son hates the car seat, he cries every single time he's put in it so don't know if we can keep him in it when he wakes up and I doubt we can get him back in it if e.g. I take him out for a feed and want to put him back in it Unfortunately don't have a stroller yet as we opted to buy a baby carriage and wait with the stroller until a bit later (couldn't afford both options from the get go). Which in our case was good because during the day he'll only sleep in his baby carriage outside (traditional here in Denmark).

As for nursing I suppose I could wear a large scarf (have tons of scarfs) and use that to cover up a bit if need be. I have a couple of nursing tops so guess I'll wear one of them. I just worry I guess that the staff or another guest will take offence anyway and want me to nurse somewhere else e.g. ask me to use the restroom

 

[staralfur]

We eat out a lot so we took my LO to restaurants pretty much since birth. I found 3-4 months to actually be the hardest but still doable. I just held her and ate one-handed and if she got fussy or cried I'd pop her on the boob and keep eating.

If someone asks you to stop breastfeeding or shows displeasure then kindly tell them to f- off. You are well within your rights to breastfeed your LO wherever you need to. No one can legally ask you to go somewhere else and I'd be sure to remind them of that.

 

[LoraLoo]

Oh we were eating out the day after Lo was born lol, we just take her n car seat or pram but usually end up holding he and passing Her between us. I just feed her if she's hungry x

 

[almosthere]

I just bring my snap and go stroller so it doesn't take up much space. I started taking my daughter since before 2 months but not often now that she is 2 months and vaccinated I take her a bit more. anyhow i have the snap and go with my diaper bag underneath and I pack a nursing cover it goes right over you for feeding privacy and baby doesn't get too hot under it it even has a pocket for breast leakage pads or w.e. I'm sure people and help hold him or walk around with him if he gets fussy. Good luck enjoy the fun dinner!

 

[Left wonderin]

If he sleeps in the baby carriage bring it with you ? The restaraunt will make room . Most are very accommodating . Oh and as for bf , feed as you normally would , if your too shy to do it at the table most places have a quiet area that you cold go and sit for a few mins to feed him. Enjoy showing your baby off

 

[wtbmummy]

I would def take baby. Depending on how long you were travelling I would take a baby carrier or pram to put baby in. As pp said most restraunts are pretty good and will make room or sit you in the corner so you have somewhere for the pram/carseat.
As for bf why cant your baby eat with the rest of you! Sod other people and their views. If u do feel uncomfortable tqke a large muslin to drape over yourself.

We will actually be taking our 3m old (maybe younger) to a wedding aswell as our 3yo. I dont see their being any problems at a formal event so Im sure you will be fine in a restraunt

 

[KatO79]

staralfur I'm not sure about the laws in Denmark though, I would think they'd be pretty open butdon't know for sure

almost, hi again Unfortunately don't have a stroller and was hoping to wait a bit before buying one as they're expensive here (expensive plus a 25% tax as per the norm on goods here). Will have to look into a cover but don't know if they sell those in this country

Left wonderin I'm not sure that the restaurant would make room. Especially as in this country, it is normal to leave your babies in the carriage outside when you go into store or to get something to eat. They may suggest we do that and although I do let him sleep outside in his carriage in our backyard right by the back door, I don't know how comfortable I'd be leaving him in front of the restaurant even though kidnapping rates here are insanely low (which is why the Danes are comfortable leaving their babies outside). It would at least have to be by a window where I can keep an eye on him but I don't know what the restaurant is like or where we'll be seated Guess if we take the carriage I'll be taking the baby alarm with if we let him sleep outside (providing it's by a window).

wtbmummy I don't think the drive to the restaurant takes more than 45 minutes to 1 hour, depending on traffic. Also we'll be seated with the rest of the family (about 10-15 other family members coming) at a table that's already reserved by DH's grandmother so the staff won't be seating us elsewhere that's more convenient Hope you're right and things go smoothly. Hope you have a nice time at the wedding!

 

[KatO79]

OK did a quick Google search and it seems that here in this country (Denmark) it's actually legal for the staff to ask you not to bf'ed So yep they may let me go to the bathroom to do it if need be but that just stinks. I'll have to try and find out what the restaurant is called and find out what their bf'ing policies are so I know beforehand. If they don't allow it, I'll definitely will be bf'ing my son before we go in (in the car if necessary) and take it from there.

 

[Left wonderin]

Gosh and I thought Denmark was a very family friendly liberal country !!! That's insane they would expect you to leave your baby outside while you sit inside eating !!!

 

[Starlight32]

I don't have any advice, but I'm the minority here who wouldn't go. I've never taken my daughter (7.5 months) to a restaurant because I know she would hate it. She hates being in a car seat or carrier. I would personally find time to see family at a different place. Perhaps they could come by for a short visit to see you guys.

 

[KatO79]

Gosh and I thought Denmark was a very family friendly liberal country !!! That's insane they would expect you to leave your baby outside while you sit inside eating !!!

It's not the baby that's the problem but they may not let me take the baby carriage inside which means that if I need to have it with for him to have a place to sleep, they'll suggest him sleeping in it outside.

In this country, it's normal to have babies sleep outside in their baby carriages. I let my son often sleep outside in his carriage (I place the carriage in our backyard just right by the back door to the house) since he actually sleeps better outside.

Starlight it's a birthday celebration for DH's grandmother who's turning 95! I don't think it's something we should just not go to as we don't know how long she'll be with us and I'd like for her to see her great grandchild as much as possible while she's still alive. Also we live 45-60 minutes away by car from the grandmother so too far for her to drive

 

[jessmke]

Will your baby sleep in the car? If it's a 45-60 min car ride to the restaurant maybe he'll nap in the car and then he won't need to nap while at the restaurant.

If you think he'll be too stimulated in the restaurant to sleep then maybe he'll just skip a nap that day. So long as he isn't screaming and creating a fuss then it shouldn't be a problem. It might make for a difficult remainder of the day for you, but at least he will get through the meal. I would just try not to worry about it too much and just go with whatever happens that day. If he is happy and content then great, if he is fussy then I'm sure your family will be more than happy to take turns walking him around and cuddling him. If all else fails and he is really hysterical then maybe you just need to leave the meal early, but at least you get to spend some time with your family first.

I can't believe the staff have the legal right to ask you not to breastfeed, that is crazy! But honestly, if you just use a nursing top they probably won't even notice you are doing it, it just looks like you are cuddling your baby. I never used a nursing cover because I feel like it draws even more attention to what you are doing and I could never get the hang of using one (well, I only tried once and then I gave up!). I have on several occasions gone to nurse my baby in the car if she is too distracted to nurse in a public place, so I think it's a good option if you have to so long as baby doesn't take too long to eat!

 

[KatO79]

Will your baby sleep in the car? If it's a 45-60 min car ride to the restaurant maybe he'll nap in the car and then he won't need to nap while at the restaurant.

If you think he'll be too stimulated in the restaurant to sleep then maybe he'll just skip a nap that day. So long as he isn't screaming and creating a fuss then it shouldn't be a problem. It might make for a difficult remainder of the day for you, but at least he will get through the meal. I would just try not to worry about it too much and just go with whatever happens that day. If he is happy and content then great, if he is fussy then I'm sure your family will be more than happy to take turns walking him around and cuddling him. If all else fails and he is really hysterical then maybe you just need to leave the meal early, but at least you get to spend some time with your family first.

I can't believe the staff have the legal right to ask you not to breastfeed, that is crazy! But honestly, if you just use a nursing top they probably won't even notice you are doing it, it just looks like you are cuddling your baby. I never used a nursing cover because I feel like it draws even more attention to what you are doing and I could never get the hang of using one (well, I only tried once and then I gave up!). I have on several occasions gone to nurse my baby in the car if she is too distracted to nurse in a public place, so I think it's a good option if you have to so long as baby doesn't take too long to eat!

Problem is my son often wakes up once the car stops (usually after a few minutes) so if we want him to keep on sleeping, we would need to quickly get the car seat out and swing him while we walk and once we sit down, rock it.

I'd considered the fact he may skip a nap, I just fear him becoming overtired and it ending up as a huge struggle to get him to sleep at DH's grandmother's house where we'll be eating dessert and having some coffee/tea. Oh and it's only DH's family as no one in my family is coming.

We may have to try parking the car as close as possible to the restaurant so we have it as a good escape place for bf'ing as I really want to avoid using the restaurant's restrooms if they don't allow me to bf at the table.

I may look into those covers though, maybe even though the restaurant normally doesn't allow bf'ing they'll allow it if I have a cover? Although I don't know if my son will be ok with it or find the cover annoying. May have to try it at home first as a test run to see if he'd even feed under it.

Yeah it's insane that the staff can actually tell you not to bf'ed. I just find it amusing that the Danes are so free and open when it comes to sex but when it comes to showing a bit of boob while bf'ing it's suddenly a no-no

I've written to the restaurant to ask them as they didn't have anything about it on their webpage and await their reply.

 

[marmoset]

Hope you get a reassuring reply from the restaurant. Amazing the cultural differences from place to place. Rooting for you!

 

[KatO79]

So luckily it's a place that does allow breastfeeding But they say that I most likely can't have the baby carriage with inside as they have so many guests during the weekend So will have to come up with something else perhaps as I don't know where DH's grandmother's reserved table will be located so can't be sure it's by a window. DH doesn't want to invest money in a stroller right now so can't do that

 

[babyjan]

I went out with OH when baby was about that age. He was tired but wouldn't sleep so I nursed him and ate one handed lol! He nursed on left side. He fell asleep thank god and we were out before he even woke.

I find it challenging now as his 9 months but as long as he has something in his hands to eat then he can be ok.

Good luck x

 

[LoveCakes]

That's great they are bf friendly!

I love that people are so trusting but I could never leave my baby outside. I'd worry about dogs and things.

Personally I'd just take turns with your husband to hold the baby and eat one handed. I've had mine cut my dinner up for me before and eat with a spoon lol just choose something from the menu that's not messy. Plus if it's lots of family who don't see your baby often I'm sure there will be lots of people who will volunteer for a cuddle.

Have a nice lunch