Terrified

[charliemeg]

Hi everyone,

I was just wondering if anyone is or was terrified of pregnancy. I am 27 and have no children but as I am getting older I am starting to think I am wanting to settle down and maybe have children soon. However I am so scared of the whole pregnancy and giving birth and the more I think of it the more I want to wait a little longer but I am wanting to try in the near future. Has anyone had or have similar fears?

I am starting to think it is just me that has these fears and when I discuss it with friends and family they tell me I am being silly.

Am I being silly?

 

[calm]

I was reading a thread on this subject the other day in TTC. It has a particular name, though it can be stronger or lighter like any phobia. I do have certain fears of pregnancy, but then again I have a generally anxious nature since young. People get this fear so bad they can't bear the thought of being pregnant. I have mixed feelings, but I admit more and more I just so want to be pregnant, and I love so much the idea of being pregnant, that the fears have basically gone away. I am also quite scared of childbirth, its not the pain, its just the thought of something so big coming out of somewhere so small! And the idea I think that when pregnant there is no getting back. As I say these fears are very small now as I really want to TTC very soon, more than anything else. I would ask your doctor, you might need to chat to someone about it, the sooner you sort it the better as with any problem. Take care xx

 

[mossip]

Hi its called tocophobia. There is a thread in ttc u shud check it out. Im sure it will help u xx

 

[Elphaba]

I wouldn't say terrified but yes the thought of giving birth scares me. I'm also really scared of morning sickness - especially as it comes in the part of pregnancy when you generally haven't told the world at large that you're pregnant. I currently don't have a job and most of the work in my field is in London which means a commute (45 mins on train and then tube to whichever part of London is needed) and that scares me having to deal with being ill on the train and being too tired to manage the commute and still hold down a job.

K x

 

[Elhaym]

I know just how you feel charliemeg - I have no children as yet, and I think when you have no idea what to expect, the thought of pregnancy and labour can be very daunting. Of course you're not being silly, I bet every woman felt the same before her first baby. Don't forget there are lots of techniques you can use - massage, water birth etc - as well as good old pain relief from drugs. You would have plenty of opportunity to talk to your doctor and midwife about all the options and do what's best for you.

I'm nervous and scared, but excited too. I just try and think to myself - childbirth will hurt, but it's all for fantastic reason in the end.

Elphaba - me too - I work at a science lab with all sorts of chemicals and smells going on, plus a 45 min bus journey either side....

 

[hattiehippo]

I'm currently expecting my first (and probably only) and I never expected to be pregnant - having children was not something I ever thought I'd want to do but that changed as i got older (37 now).
I was always really freaked out and scared of the idea of being pregnant - not so much the idea of giving birth but more sharing your body and not being in control of it anymore.
I was really freaked out when I first found out and it has been hard accepting that my body just does things without me having any say but I'm actually quite enjoying it now (nearly 19 weeks) and I'm amazed by the idea of my body knowing how to grow a whole new person.
I've been lucky cos I haven't actually been sick but had constant nausea and wretching from week 8 to 15 - after a while you do get used to it and just carry on with life as best you can!
I don't know if any of that helps but I just wanted to comment as I was always scared of being pregnant and it's actually been ok so far.

 

[ricschick]

giving birth still scares me and ive had 3! but as you get closer to giving birth your so excited and fed up of being preg you cant wait to go into labour. and as for being pregnant i love being pregnant it makes you feel so special.

 

[rainbud]

I think that its very normal to be scared of many things before having a baby. Its not silly at all. I my self posted a few threads on being scared. Not about being pregnant, although i haven't thought about it much. I want to be pregnant i want to know what its like but it is scary at the same time because you don't know what to expect. Some women have very nice pregnancies and others find it hard. I think any one who tells you you are being silly is being silly themselves because its natural to think about these things.

 

[charliemeg]

Thanks everyone. I will check the tread out in TTC. I am not sure what scares me and I am usually a person that faces my fears head on but the thought of the whole pregnancy and giving birth frightens the pants off me. I did go through a stage of wanting a child but think that also had something to do with my hormone levels at the time with changing and coming off the pill. None of them work for me so we are doing natural family planning and there is a high risk of becoming pregnant that way. I am so careful and I am in a situation that if I did get pregnant it would not be a bad time its just my fears. Thanks again everyone