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Mama of 4, growing #5
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- May 28, 2012
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After dealing with high blood pressure the last few weeks of pregnancy, the blood pressure medication I was prescribed stopped working and I was admitted to hospital awaiting an induction by cervadil. It was eventually decided, since the wait list was so long, my symptoms and the gestation of baby boy, 39w1d, that I should instead be induced using prostiglan gel as an outpatient. The on call doctor inserted my first dose around 10pm Monday, March 31st. At that time I was told I was 1cm dilated and not very effaced, very long but soft. Within a half hour I started experiencing contractions about every 2 minutes, though they were painless, and I could see them spiking on the monitor. I went home, and there contractions became uncomfortable but still completely bearable. I spent most of the night walking, bouncing on my stability ball and trying to do what I could to keep them going and hopefully lead into real labor.
By morning April 1st, I was still having contractions but they had not picked up any. My husband drove us back to the hospital and I received my second dose of gels and found out that my first had dilated me to a "good" , stretchy 2cm and I was starting to efface- which was amazing news, Id been terrified that nothing would happen. Almost immediately after getting the second dose I could tell things were starting to pick up. The contractions were harder and longer, and about 2 minutes apart. I was told to return to get a third dose at 3:30 pm that day. I went home and the contractions got much more intense. I could feel something was happening and had a suspicion I might be in labor but did not want to get my hopes up, or Matthew's. I tried my best to drink, eat and relax but I was finding it increasingly difficult. The drive back to the hospital felt really long. Not being able to move during contractions was making them feel a lot more intense than they had been at home. I tried to breathe and relax between them, and was able to zone out and doze between many of them, which was a huge relief because I was exhausted from being up the night before.
When we got to the hospital I was put on the monitors for 20 minutes before the third gel was inserted. The whole time I was contracting fairly hard. When the nurse came in she decided to check me before she opened the dose of gels Just in case. That turned out to be a good idea, because when I was checked again I was 3, almost 4cm dilated, effacing well and my waters were bulging. The nurse called down, and let the doctor know I couldnt be given any more gels because my cervix was way too favorable, and she was pretty sure I was in labour. Because I lived an hour away from the hospital, the nurse told me not to go home, to walk for an hour and be checked by early labour. If things stopped, I was booked for an induction first thing the next morning.
I walked for an hour, the contractions were uncomfortable but bearable. I found myself stopping to breathe through some of them, but over all things hadnt picked up too much in that hour. When I was checked my cervix was now a full 4cm, but still fairly long. The nurses asked me not to go home, and instead to walk for 2 hours, have supper and come back. It was 6:15pm when I headed out for more walking, and we planned to come back for 8:15. We were both starving so decided to go for a drive and get something quick to eat. We headed out to McDonalds, and once I got in the car I realized what a terrible idea it was! The contractions got a lot harder as soon as I was sitting in the car. I was able to handle them but once we got there, Matthew headed in to pick up food, and I was absolutely unable to sit in the car. I got out into the parking lot and leaned against the car to get through contractions. When Matthew came back out to the car with our food, he could definitely tell things were starting to really happen. He insisted I eat some food as Id not been eating much the past few days, and I tried. He then asked if we should head back to the hospital, and I decided that was definitely a good idea!
Once we got back to the hospital I was still determined to walk until quarter after eight. During this time the contractions had gotten really strong and I was having a ton of bloody show. I had to stop to get through each contraction, walking through them was no longer an option. I also needed Matthew to hold me through each contraction. If he was too far away, Id yell for him, and he would come over and Id lean against him while I swayed through each contraction. It was very clear things were picking up, so we headed back to be checked before the two hours were up. When I arrived the staff could tell I was in labour. I was checked and had effaced most of the way, where I had been fairly long the whole time until now, and was about 4.5 cm dilated. They asked me if I wanted an epidural, and I told them I just want to use a your bathtub and ball. The nurse laughed and told me That I can do- I can get you a ball and bathtub!. I was moved down to a birth room, but not admitted and left there for self care, a nurse would check me every hour or so but I wouldnt have staff there 24/7 like when you are admitted to the hospital.
I walked for a while when I got to the room and then decided to get into the bathtub, which felt like the most amazing thing. I felt more rested when I got into it than I had in weeks. I stayed in for a while, but then noticed my contractions had started to space out and I got out and decided to bounce on the ball and walk in order to get things to pick up again, which they did. Matthew kept insisting that I get checked because things were picking up, but I was scared I would call someone and when they arrived Id be told I wasnt progressing yet, which I did not want to hear! When a nurse eventually came in again for a check on her own, around 11pm, I was 5cm and obviously in labour. We made the decision that I would be admitted at this time, and a doctor would come down to break my waters. The nurse that would be staying came in to introduce herself, Matthew went out to the car to bring in our bags and my birth plan, and I finally felt like I was going to be having this baby!
The nurse was great about my birth plan. I was very nervous that they wouldnt like reading my birth plan, or respect what it said, but it was obvious that that was not the case. She read it, and was very enthusiastic about my plan. Then all of the doctors and medical students on duty came in and read my plan as well. I was complimented on how well it was laid out, and how clear it was. My doctor used it to show the med students what a good birth plan looked like.
Once everyone had read my birth plan, the doctor broke my water. It was extremely easy, apparently my waters were bulging a lot so it was just like popping a full balloon. I decided to stay on the bed for a while until most of the gushing was over, but found the contractions picked up almost immediately and I had to move after a minute or two. I moved to the end of the bed, and rocked on the birth ball leaning over the end of the bed, while Matthew applied counter pressure to my back. I found I was coping so far fairly well with the contractions, and when the bathtub was suggested I didnt want it- at least not yet. I knew it was unlikely to slow down my labour again at this point, but it just felt right to rock on the ball. I found the difference between induced oxytocin drip contractions was huge. These contractions were very intense, but in between my body would relax fully, there was no constant pain and tension like my previous labour.
Eventually I moved to the bathtub when the ball was not giving me any relief anymore. It once again, felt amazing. I needed it to be really, really hot though, and was constantly getting my husband to add more hot water because it felt too cold. Whenever a contraction would start Id get him to pour cups full of water over my belly. After a little while things started to pick up a lot. My legs and after a few contractions, my whole body started to shake, and waves of nausea hit hard. My nurse got a basin for me to throw up in, but mostly I would feel the need to throw up and nothing would come up. Normally I hate vomiting but at this point I could not have cared less.
After the shaking went on for a while, I noticed something else started to happen with each contraction- I was not trying to push, but my body was starting to bear down without my doing anything. My nurse noticed and asked if I was pushing, quite worried since I was still in the bathtub. I told her I wasnt pushing, but it felt like my body was pushing all on its own. She decided we definitely needed to check me, and her and Matthew helped me out of the bathtub and wrapped a blanket around me. I was shaking so much, and the contractions were coming so hard and so close at this point I could barely walk to the bed. When I got there the nurse checked and I was still only 7cm dilated, so she couldnt explain why I was having the urge to push (Urge might have been a generous word for it. I could do nothing to stop my body from pushing.) I stayed on my back for a while, mostly because without the relief of the bath (Which was not really providing much relief at this point anyway) I didnt know how else I should or could move. With every contraction my body would bear down, and the sensation of his head being pushed against my closed cervix was very painful. My nurse eventually got me on my hands and knees when I told her I didnt know what to do, and the position changed helped a little.
I remember vaguely what was going on around me while I was on hands and knees, my husband pulling back my hair for me, and the nurse trying to coach me through deep breathing during the contractions in order to stop myself from pushing. It would work for the first part of the contraction, but then I wouldnt be able to hold my body back from pushing any longer. Whenever I would push, I could hear myself screaming trying to stop myself from pushing. Id been self-conscious about making noise during labour but at this point I knew I was screaming as loud as I could, and I didnt really care (except I remember apologizing to my nurse, which is in hindsight kind of funny). At this point I really started doubting my ability to do this myself. I cried to Matthew and my nurse in between contractions telling them it hurt, and that I couldnt do it. They were fantastic, telling me I could do it, and that I was doing it. My nurse did another check, I have no idea how long after the last one it was, and I was dilated to an eight. I remember feeling so disheartened, knowing I still needed to go two more centimeters before Id be able to let myself push. I had no sense of time anymore, so I had no idea how quickly I was actually progressing.
I rolled over on my side, and for a while I completely lost the will to fight against the pushing. I was completely focused on my labour, Id actually lost any sense of time or place. All that mattered was each contraction. I remember feeling Matthew climbing on the bed behind me and holding me while I screamed and pushed. I wanted to say thank you, but I couldnt form words anymore, except for saying it hurt. After a little while I told my nurse I wanted drugs, and that I couldnt do this anymore. She was amazing. She told me what I deep down knew, I was in transition and just like in my last labour, I was starting to doubt myself but that I could do it. She told me she had read my birth plan and she knew that I did not want drugs. After I kept asking she asked me what I wanted. I told her I was thinking about asking for gas and air, she told me she could get that for me if I really wanted it. I said I thought I might. She told me we would talk about it after the next contraction. Once I got through that one, she told me we would see how I felt about it after the next contraction. After each contraction with her and Matthews coaching, Id decide to wait just one more contraction to see how I felt.
My nurse checked my dilation and I was nine centimeters. She told me she was calling in the doctors because she thought I was about to go, and go fast. I didnt even register what she said. I was so focused on making it through each contraction as they came. (and screaming, Ive never screamed more in my life). When she and Matthew helped roll me over, the whole room came into focus, and I could see the team of doctors at the end of my bed. It was like I had completely forgotten I was in a room, or any place at all. It felt like waking up in a very strange place. I told this to Matthew and he asked me where I thought I was when I said I forgot I was in the hospital. I told him nowhere. I asked why the doctors were there, if something was wrong. My doctors laughed and told me they were there because I was going to be having my baby now! The nurse told them I was still a nine, but getting close to a ten. I tearfully told the doctor that I couldnt stop pushing even though I wasnt dilated yet. She told me to go for it, and just push with the next contraction. I swear nothing has felt like a greater relief in all my life. When the contraction came, I let my body push and it felt so, so amazingly good. The doctor checked me after the contraction, and Id pushed past nine centimeters and was now fully dilated. We were ready to deliver my son. The doctor coached me through the first push, when I told him my legs were too tired from pushing to hold up anymore, and told me in just a few moments I was going to be pulling out my baby. After the first push he told me he could see my babys head. With the next contraction he had my push very small, short pushes as the other doctor tried to make sure we could maneuver baby out without having his shoulder get stuck like my first. Then, before I knew it I felt an intense burning and I was told to reach down and grab my baby. The doctor helped me wrap my hands around under his arms as his shoulders emerged and then, at 1:58am, April 2nd, 2015, 2 hours and 23 minutes after my water had broken, including 2 minutes of pushing, , I pulled out my son, delivering him into my own hands. It was surreal.
There were some complications directly after the birth. As I lifted Reed up onto my chest, his cord snapped. It was extremely short, and wrapped around his shoulders. The doctor quickly clamped it, and it shouldnt have been an issue. However after he lay on my chest for a few moments it was obvious he was not going to breathe on his own. He was dark, dark purple all over. The speed of delivery had stunned him. The baby team came running in, and he was scooped off my chest and surrounded by doctors on the warming table. I completely lost it, and the doctors kept reassuring me he was going to be alright. After what seemed like forever I heard him cry. Matthew rushed over and checked on him for me, and the doctor told him to take pictures. All I could manage was telling the doctors and nurses over and over again that I wanted to see my baby, and asking if he was ok. Matthew brought over the camera and showed me a picture he had taken of Reed.
A few minutes after Reed started to breathe we discovered there was yet another issue. Also likely due to the speed of delivery, my uterus was not contracting down, and I was not delivering the placenta. I started bleeding badly. The doctor told me it was ok for my placenta to take this long, but they asked if they could give me a shot of pitocin. I agreed. I started bleeding worse and worse, but all I could do was keep asking about Reed, and if he was ok. The doctors tried giving me another shot of pitocin, and then hooked me up to an IV. I delivered the placenta, but I could feel blood coming out of me in huge gushes. They then told me they needed to try some other medications to stop the bleeding. I was given several other needles and a suppository of some kind, and two nurses worked on massaging my uterus, which was really painful. The doctors started doing an exam of my uterus, looking for tears inside of it. Luckily they found none, it just did not want to contract down. It was also essentially in shock from the speed of delivery. They found a small first degree internal tear which they stitched, but nothing to explain the bleeding. Someone brought me baby boy, and I was so relieved to be holding him. He was quiet, bruised and purple all over, but breathing and healthy. I told Matthew I was surprised he had hair, lots of black hair. He looked just like me as a baby. The doctor encouraged me to nurse him immediately to stop the bleeding, which I did. After a second he latched on beautifully and started to nurse. The combination of the medications, massage and breastfeeding finally caused my uterus to start to contract down- hard. I could feel the bleeding slowing almost immediately.
We stayed in the delivery suite until around 5am. At first I felt too weak to move, but eventually I started feeling much better. I never let go of baby boy the whole time. Despite how exhausted and weak I felt I couldnt sleep. Matthew was passed out in the glider beside the bed. Luckily by later that morning I was told I would not need a blood transfusion, which was amazing news. Even though things did not go exactly as planned, I had a healthy, amazing baby, I was ok, Id achieved my natural birth, caught my son in my own hands, and my birth plan had been honoured and respected down to the letter. It was unexpected and difficult in ways I couldnt have imagined beforehand, but Ill always think of it as the amazing journey I took to meet my son!https://i61.tinypic.com/259xuuv.jpg
By morning April 1st, I was still having contractions but they had not picked up any. My husband drove us back to the hospital and I received my second dose of gels and found out that my first had dilated me to a "good" , stretchy 2cm and I was starting to efface- which was amazing news, Id been terrified that nothing would happen. Almost immediately after getting the second dose I could tell things were starting to pick up. The contractions were harder and longer, and about 2 minutes apart. I was told to return to get a third dose at 3:30 pm that day. I went home and the contractions got much more intense. I could feel something was happening and had a suspicion I might be in labor but did not want to get my hopes up, or Matthew's. I tried my best to drink, eat and relax but I was finding it increasingly difficult. The drive back to the hospital felt really long. Not being able to move during contractions was making them feel a lot more intense than they had been at home. I tried to breathe and relax between them, and was able to zone out and doze between many of them, which was a huge relief because I was exhausted from being up the night before.
When we got to the hospital I was put on the monitors for 20 minutes before the third gel was inserted. The whole time I was contracting fairly hard. When the nurse came in she decided to check me before she opened the dose of gels Just in case. That turned out to be a good idea, because when I was checked again I was 3, almost 4cm dilated, effacing well and my waters were bulging. The nurse called down, and let the doctor know I couldnt be given any more gels because my cervix was way too favorable, and she was pretty sure I was in labour. Because I lived an hour away from the hospital, the nurse told me not to go home, to walk for an hour and be checked by early labour. If things stopped, I was booked for an induction first thing the next morning.
I walked for an hour, the contractions were uncomfortable but bearable. I found myself stopping to breathe through some of them, but over all things hadnt picked up too much in that hour. When I was checked my cervix was now a full 4cm, but still fairly long. The nurses asked me not to go home, and instead to walk for 2 hours, have supper and come back. It was 6:15pm when I headed out for more walking, and we planned to come back for 8:15. We were both starving so decided to go for a drive and get something quick to eat. We headed out to McDonalds, and once I got in the car I realized what a terrible idea it was! The contractions got a lot harder as soon as I was sitting in the car. I was able to handle them but once we got there, Matthew headed in to pick up food, and I was absolutely unable to sit in the car. I got out into the parking lot and leaned against the car to get through contractions. When Matthew came back out to the car with our food, he could definitely tell things were starting to really happen. He insisted I eat some food as Id not been eating much the past few days, and I tried. He then asked if we should head back to the hospital, and I decided that was definitely a good idea!
Once we got back to the hospital I was still determined to walk until quarter after eight. During this time the contractions had gotten really strong and I was having a ton of bloody show. I had to stop to get through each contraction, walking through them was no longer an option. I also needed Matthew to hold me through each contraction. If he was too far away, Id yell for him, and he would come over and Id lean against him while I swayed through each contraction. It was very clear things were picking up, so we headed back to be checked before the two hours were up. When I arrived the staff could tell I was in labour. I was checked and had effaced most of the way, where I had been fairly long the whole time until now, and was about 4.5 cm dilated. They asked me if I wanted an epidural, and I told them I just want to use a your bathtub and ball. The nurse laughed and told me That I can do- I can get you a ball and bathtub!. I was moved down to a birth room, but not admitted and left there for self care, a nurse would check me every hour or so but I wouldnt have staff there 24/7 like when you are admitted to the hospital.
I walked for a while when I got to the room and then decided to get into the bathtub, which felt like the most amazing thing. I felt more rested when I got into it than I had in weeks. I stayed in for a while, but then noticed my contractions had started to space out and I got out and decided to bounce on the ball and walk in order to get things to pick up again, which they did. Matthew kept insisting that I get checked because things were picking up, but I was scared I would call someone and when they arrived Id be told I wasnt progressing yet, which I did not want to hear! When a nurse eventually came in again for a check on her own, around 11pm, I was 5cm and obviously in labour. We made the decision that I would be admitted at this time, and a doctor would come down to break my waters. The nurse that would be staying came in to introduce herself, Matthew went out to the car to bring in our bags and my birth plan, and I finally felt like I was going to be having this baby!
The nurse was great about my birth plan. I was very nervous that they wouldnt like reading my birth plan, or respect what it said, but it was obvious that that was not the case. She read it, and was very enthusiastic about my plan. Then all of the doctors and medical students on duty came in and read my plan as well. I was complimented on how well it was laid out, and how clear it was. My doctor used it to show the med students what a good birth plan looked like.
Once everyone had read my birth plan, the doctor broke my water. It was extremely easy, apparently my waters were bulging a lot so it was just like popping a full balloon. I decided to stay on the bed for a while until most of the gushing was over, but found the contractions picked up almost immediately and I had to move after a minute or two. I moved to the end of the bed, and rocked on the birth ball leaning over the end of the bed, while Matthew applied counter pressure to my back. I found I was coping so far fairly well with the contractions, and when the bathtub was suggested I didnt want it- at least not yet. I knew it was unlikely to slow down my labour again at this point, but it just felt right to rock on the ball. I found the difference between induced oxytocin drip contractions was huge. These contractions were very intense, but in between my body would relax fully, there was no constant pain and tension like my previous labour.
Eventually I moved to the bathtub when the ball was not giving me any relief anymore. It once again, felt amazing. I needed it to be really, really hot though, and was constantly getting my husband to add more hot water because it felt too cold. Whenever a contraction would start Id get him to pour cups full of water over my belly. After a little while things started to pick up a lot. My legs and after a few contractions, my whole body started to shake, and waves of nausea hit hard. My nurse got a basin for me to throw up in, but mostly I would feel the need to throw up and nothing would come up. Normally I hate vomiting but at this point I could not have cared less.
After the shaking went on for a while, I noticed something else started to happen with each contraction- I was not trying to push, but my body was starting to bear down without my doing anything. My nurse noticed and asked if I was pushing, quite worried since I was still in the bathtub. I told her I wasnt pushing, but it felt like my body was pushing all on its own. She decided we definitely needed to check me, and her and Matthew helped me out of the bathtub and wrapped a blanket around me. I was shaking so much, and the contractions were coming so hard and so close at this point I could barely walk to the bed. When I got there the nurse checked and I was still only 7cm dilated, so she couldnt explain why I was having the urge to push (Urge might have been a generous word for it. I could do nothing to stop my body from pushing.) I stayed on my back for a while, mostly because without the relief of the bath (Which was not really providing much relief at this point anyway) I didnt know how else I should or could move. With every contraction my body would bear down, and the sensation of his head being pushed against my closed cervix was very painful. My nurse eventually got me on my hands and knees when I told her I didnt know what to do, and the position changed helped a little.
I remember vaguely what was going on around me while I was on hands and knees, my husband pulling back my hair for me, and the nurse trying to coach me through deep breathing during the contractions in order to stop myself from pushing. It would work for the first part of the contraction, but then I wouldnt be able to hold my body back from pushing any longer. Whenever I would push, I could hear myself screaming trying to stop myself from pushing. Id been self-conscious about making noise during labour but at this point I knew I was screaming as loud as I could, and I didnt really care (except I remember apologizing to my nurse, which is in hindsight kind of funny). At this point I really started doubting my ability to do this myself. I cried to Matthew and my nurse in between contractions telling them it hurt, and that I couldnt do it. They were fantastic, telling me I could do it, and that I was doing it. My nurse did another check, I have no idea how long after the last one it was, and I was dilated to an eight. I remember feeling so disheartened, knowing I still needed to go two more centimeters before Id be able to let myself push. I had no sense of time anymore, so I had no idea how quickly I was actually progressing.
I rolled over on my side, and for a while I completely lost the will to fight against the pushing. I was completely focused on my labour, Id actually lost any sense of time or place. All that mattered was each contraction. I remember feeling Matthew climbing on the bed behind me and holding me while I screamed and pushed. I wanted to say thank you, but I couldnt form words anymore, except for saying it hurt. After a little while I told my nurse I wanted drugs, and that I couldnt do this anymore. She was amazing. She told me what I deep down knew, I was in transition and just like in my last labour, I was starting to doubt myself but that I could do it. She told me she had read my birth plan and she knew that I did not want drugs. After I kept asking she asked me what I wanted. I told her I was thinking about asking for gas and air, she told me she could get that for me if I really wanted it. I said I thought I might. She told me we would talk about it after the next contraction. Once I got through that one, she told me we would see how I felt about it after the next contraction. After each contraction with her and Matthews coaching, Id decide to wait just one more contraction to see how I felt.
My nurse checked my dilation and I was nine centimeters. She told me she was calling in the doctors because she thought I was about to go, and go fast. I didnt even register what she said. I was so focused on making it through each contraction as they came. (and screaming, Ive never screamed more in my life). When she and Matthew helped roll me over, the whole room came into focus, and I could see the team of doctors at the end of my bed. It was like I had completely forgotten I was in a room, or any place at all. It felt like waking up in a very strange place. I told this to Matthew and he asked me where I thought I was when I said I forgot I was in the hospital. I told him nowhere. I asked why the doctors were there, if something was wrong. My doctors laughed and told me they were there because I was going to be having my baby now! The nurse told them I was still a nine, but getting close to a ten. I tearfully told the doctor that I couldnt stop pushing even though I wasnt dilated yet. She told me to go for it, and just push with the next contraction. I swear nothing has felt like a greater relief in all my life. When the contraction came, I let my body push and it felt so, so amazingly good. The doctor checked me after the contraction, and Id pushed past nine centimeters and was now fully dilated. We were ready to deliver my son. The doctor coached me through the first push, when I told him my legs were too tired from pushing to hold up anymore, and told me in just a few moments I was going to be pulling out my baby. After the first push he told me he could see my babys head. With the next contraction he had my push very small, short pushes as the other doctor tried to make sure we could maneuver baby out without having his shoulder get stuck like my first. Then, before I knew it I felt an intense burning and I was told to reach down and grab my baby. The doctor helped me wrap my hands around under his arms as his shoulders emerged and then, at 1:58am, April 2nd, 2015, 2 hours and 23 minutes after my water had broken, including 2 minutes of pushing, , I pulled out my son, delivering him into my own hands. It was surreal.
There were some complications directly after the birth. As I lifted Reed up onto my chest, his cord snapped. It was extremely short, and wrapped around his shoulders. The doctor quickly clamped it, and it shouldnt have been an issue. However after he lay on my chest for a few moments it was obvious he was not going to breathe on his own. He was dark, dark purple all over. The speed of delivery had stunned him. The baby team came running in, and he was scooped off my chest and surrounded by doctors on the warming table. I completely lost it, and the doctors kept reassuring me he was going to be alright. After what seemed like forever I heard him cry. Matthew rushed over and checked on him for me, and the doctor told him to take pictures. All I could manage was telling the doctors and nurses over and over again that I wanted to see my baby, and asking if he was ok. Matthew brought over the camera and showed me a picture he had taken of Reed.
A few minutes after Reed started to breathe we discovered there was yet another issue. Also likely due to the speed of delivery, my uterus was not contracting down, and I was not delivering the placenta. I started bleeding badly. The doctor told me it was ok for my placenta to take this long, but they asked if they could give me a shot of pitocin. I agreed. I started bleeding worse and worse, but all I could do was keep asking about Reed, and if he was ok. The doctors tried giving me another shot of pitocin, and then hooked me up to an IV. I delivered the placenta, but I could feel blood coming out of me in huge gushes. They then told me they needed to try some other medications to stop the bleeding. I was given several other needles and a suppository of some kind, and two nurses worked on massaging my uterus, which was really painful. The doctors started doing an exam of my uterus, looking for tears inside of it. Luckily they found none, it just did not want to contract down. It was also essentially in shock from the speed of delivery. They found a small first degree internal tear which they stitched, but nothing to explain the bleeding. Someone brought me baby boy, and I was so relieved to be holding him. He was quiet, bruised and purple all over, but breathing and healthy. I told Matthew I was surprised he had hair, lots of black hair. He looked just like me as a baby. The doctor encouraged me to nurse him immediately to stop the bleeding, which I did. After a second he latched on beautifully and started to nurse. The combination of the medications, massage and breastfeeding finally caused my uterus to start to contract down- hard. I could feel the bleeding slowing almost immediately.
We stayed in the delivery suite until around 5am. At first I felt too weak to move, but eventually I started feeling much better. I never let go of baby boy the whole time. Despite how exhausted and weak I felt I couldnt sleep. Matthew was passed out in the glider beside the bed. Luckily by later that morning I was told I would not need a blood transfusion, which was amazing news. Even though things did not go exactly as planned, I had a healthy, amazing baby, I was ok, Id achieved my natural birth, caught my son in my own hands, and my birth plan had been honoured and respected down to the letter. It was unexpected and difficult in ways I couldnt have imagined beforehand, but Ill always think of it as the amazing journey I took to meet my son!https://i61.tinypic.com/259xuuv.jpg
the pic really is beautiful and full of emotion!
