The "Dear...." Game

[Cara x]

Dear bigbloomerz,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're a leprechaun. I think I realised it when I finally changed my underwear at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on your ‘My Little Pony’ collection. I'm sure you're middle-class
enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men.
I'm returning your nose hair clippers but I'll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I am better off without you and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

Your everlasting enemy
Cara

 

[Waiting4Bump]

Dear Cara,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm joining the convent. I think I realised it when you smacked my ass at the mental hospital and I saw you drive over the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear but I'll keep the results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I hate your cooking and you ruined my attempts at another world war.


Greetings to your frog Leonard,
Laura x

 

[jadeemma79]

Dear Laura,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realised it when I saw the purple monkey in your closet and I saw you hit on my father. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear but I'll keep your neighbors dog as a memory. You should also know that I always will remember the pep talks and i’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

Warm tingly sensations.

Emma =] xxx