The mental health support thread!

[confused87com]

I'm so sorry you seem so alone mamaloco. I know how hard it is andi do have family near. Even if they are useless. I think men have a hard time understanding . My husband did try but u think the novelty has worn off now and he just won't even talk to me about it. When I Am at my lowest he doesn't even stay in the house. He goes out. Doesn't realise how much just a hug would help. I don't have any advice but I know we will all get through this. I think I need my meds changing or increasing. This would mean another trip to the psych.....which I can't do with kids. .....but I have no child care. Madness. I'm so sick of feeling like a burden to treat becausei have kids. Its a perinatal team they should make allowances for people having babies surely

 

[katherinegrey]

That's awful. The CPN from my perinatal team comes to my house and if I have no childcare I can take my kids to see the psych too! See if they can send a CPN round, they can prescribe medication too most of them.

 

[Rhio92]

Hi, just found this and wondering how you're all doing?

I'm Rhiannon, I'm 23 and have 2 children; Connor who's 5 and Saskia who's 9 months.

I'm struggling at the moment. Last year I spent 10 weeks on the mother and baby unit with severe anxiety and depression. I gave birth to Saskia whilst an inpatient, and was discharged when she was 3 weeks olds. I was discharged from the perinatal psychiatric team fully in December. I was getting better.

I am 99% certain I have borderline personality disorder. All my diagnoses all kind of fit, but BPD fits me, nothing has ever fit so well.

I'm scared at the moment. I'm so unstable. I lash out at OH and say awful things to him, I can't cope with emotions. I'm either am or I'm not. And by that I mean, for example, I'm not angry Or im explosive. I'm not sad or I'm in a deep depression. There's no inbetween. It's agony.

Right now I'm struggling. OH is talking about us splitting up. I love him so much, I don't know what to do. I can't cope with this. When we got together he was head over heels in love with me. Now he's not, and it's so painful.

I've got a full months dose of antidepressants in my room and it's taking every ounce of my being to not take them all. I don't want to die I just want everything to stop hurting. I've made everyone go away. I only have OH and his family left.

This is so hard.

 

[katherinegrey]

Oh sweetie. Practical advise would be ring your CPN or psychiatrist or even GP and tell them you suspect borderline personality disorder. I'd been saying for a while to DH I thought I had bipolar, my previous diagnosis of depression wasn't enough. I would be so elated then take lots on, face the inevitable crash and then sink into a depression so deep I couldn't function. Because I didn't understand I had bipolar I couldn't understand why I would get well and then go back down.
In the end I felt exactly like you. I wanted it to stop. I attempted suicide. Not to die, but because I'd had enough. My DH told paramedics he thought I had undiagnosed bipolar and it started the process to getting me diagnosed. But the trust was destroyed. It took a long time for my DH to forgive me. He felt he wasn't enough to make me want to fight.

So fight. Read up on borderline and ask your DH to do the same. My DH read so much on bipolar to try and understand me. Understanding my own illness really helped me.

I have bipolar and anxiety disorder and some days it threatens to crush me but overall I'm better than I've been for years.

It can and will get better. I know fighting when you want to give up is the hardest thing ever to do, but your children need you. I know you feel like they'd be better off without you but you are irreplaceable. I promise you. Fight. And you can message me if you need to. I'm here for you.