The whole reason for this thread makes me feel like a horrible person.

[MKHewson]

So I found out I was pregnant over 2.5 weeks ago, I had an early scan on Nov 28th. After we met with the nurse at my fertility clinic, ( I had to use minor medical intervention to get pregnant) at the meeting she told me there are two gestational sacs present. So twins technically, we were warned that one is thriving while the other was not. Now I find myself even more disconnected, the idea of twins is terrifying.
I went into this for the dream of a second child, not a third as well. I feel so horrible for feeling this way, I dont know if its the hormones fueling the irrational fear or not.
I feel incredibly ungrateful if there ends up being two HB on Dec 17th. How will I cope, will my daughter understand, what about medically speaking would they be healthy, there seems to be far more to worry about then to be hopeful about>
Uggh,,,and all while I just feel like a awful person

 

[butterflywolf]

First off you are not an awful person. I can't really relate but I know the feeling at the same time. Last pregnancy I got Gender Disappointment and pretty sure I'll have it again if we don't get what we wanted since this is our last. It does make you feel like an awful person and then you feel even worse because of that.

Now, I am currently doing better since I accepted whatever gender baby is going to be is going to be (for now until we find out). Just breathe, relax and know if there is two heartbeats it is meant to be. Yes it will be hard and not what you imagined but that's a part of trying and becoming pregnant. Your daughter will understand.

Best advice I can give is this, once more you are not now nor ever been an awful person. This doesn't make you an awful person. Secondly try to find a person or two and if you're lucky even a support group that can relate to what you are going through and talking about it. I found that talking about it to people that wont judge me was what helped me.

I wish you the best. *hugs*

 

[SleepyBaby]

You are not a bad person in any sense of the word!

You where not expecting two babies! its a shock! your allowed to feel whatever way you want to about it, its double what you expected, double the work and double the stress, but also double the love in the end!

take some time to get your head around things, try and find someone or a group online who knows what it feels like and see if you can join the group!

sending you hugs and happy thoughts, it might not be easy but you will make it through x x

 

[Septie]

Totally normal!!

 

[MKHewson]

Thanks ladies, my mind has been non stop spooling since my US. I appreciate your kind words.

 

[kitty1987]

You are not a bad person

Everybody keeps telling me that I am having twins as I already have a bump and my symptoms have been so bad. I know that if I see twins at my scan next week, I will be terrified and burst into tears. I think it is a perfectly normal response x

 

[myra]

I imagine is feel the same way if I found out there were 2 sacs at my scan. I have a son already and I can't imagine having a 2 year old plus twins. I'd be conflicted about outcomes for the second scan- I think I might feel relief if there was just one HB but also guilty about feeling that. I think what you're going through is normal.

 

[MKHewson]

I imagine is feel the same way if I found out there were 2 sacs at my scan. I have a son already and I can't imagine having a 2 year old plus twins. I'd be conflicted about outcomes for the second scan- I think I might feel relief if there was just one HB but also guilty about feeling that. I think what you're going through is normal.

Interestingly enough you have the same first name as me. .. or well your user name is the same as me lol

 

[starnicole]

I had a little cry when i found out we were having twins. It was completely unexpected. My husbandwas elated whilst i was freaking out. Ive accepted it now and am worrying about something happening to one of them!

 

[lanet]

I can't relate because after years of infertility I was elated with 2. We also put back 2 embryos so it's not such a surprise when you get 2 babies!
However I think it's normal for you to feel that way and the only advice I can offer is to come on over to the twin thread if you do find out thats the situation you're in. I'm not going to lie, it does feel quite different and risky to have 2. I've worried more than I ever have in my life. And had many more dr appts. But I'm just so in love with them both. And I'm sure you will accept it too once you know for sure!

 

[MKHewson]

I can't relate because after years of infertility I was elated with 2. We also put back 2 embryos so it's not such a surprise when you get 2 babies!
However I think it's normal for you to feel that way and the only advice I can offer is to come on over to the twin thread if you do find out thats the situation you're in. I'm not going to lie, it does feel quite different and risky to have 2. I've worried more than I ever have in my life. And had many more dr appts. But I'm just so in love with them both. And I'm sure you will accept it too once you know for sure!

Thanks so much, well dec 17th I will know which direction I will be heading. For now I can just hope healthy and see what happens