To get pregnant....or not...

[littlelessig]

Hey everyone, I'm new to the forums. So , I guess this is my intro.

My Fiance and I just got engaged on 4/4/13-our 7th anniversary together.
We are getting married next June ('14) in St. Thomas.
I had weight loss surgery august of last year ('12)

With all that being said, we are "kind of" trying. As soon as we got engaged...we "tried" about 4 times that week while we were in disney. Then I ended up getting my period.

So heres my questions....
1)when should I start tracking? I would like for it to happen when its meant to be but i feel like i should be tracking ovulation and stuff.

2)when should i start worrying? If i don't get pregnant after trying a certain amt of time...when should I worry? How long does it normally take to get pregnant.

3) I have vaginismus. Does anyone else on the forum have it? (its tightening of the vaginal muscles that makes it pretty hard sometimes to have intercourse.....let alone a doctors visit...*yes i know i will have to go to a doctors visit...eventually*)

We are going to be "trying" ----or not preventing for a couple more months as we don't want to be 9 months pregnant at the wedding lol...we would like it to happen before then .....or right after. I understand I can't fly being in the 3rd trimester.

I am a now healthy 27 (almost 28) year old. And he is a pretty healthy (slightly over weight) 28 year old.

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

 

[pachamama92]

Hey and welome to the forum! To answer your questions..

1.) You don't need to track, just make sure you are having sex regularly throughout your cycle. Read up on signs you are ovulating and see if you can recognise any. Make sure you keep track of your periods especially if they aren't regular. But generally just relax.

2.) At 28 I think it's if nothing happens within a year or so of stopping using protection

3.) I have vaginismus and yeah it is a right old pain (I think that's what worried me most about being pregnant!) but you don't normally have any internal checks until quite far along. I didn't have any internal checks until I was in labour and then I had two to check how dilated I was and then I had an epidural and with that you feel nothing so no need to worry. Cross that bridge when you come to it!

Good luck and keep us posted! xo

 

[littlelessig]

Hey and welome to the forum! To answer your questions..

1.) You don't need to track, just make sure you are having sex regularly throughout your cycle. Read up on signs you are ovulating and see if you can recognise any. Make sure you keep track of your periods especially if they aren't regular. But generally just relax.

2.) At 28 I think it's if nothing happens within a year or so of stopping using protection

3.) I have vaginismus and yeah it is a right old pain (I think that's what worried me most about being pregnant!) but you don't normally have any internal checks until quite far along. I didn't have any internal checks until I was in labour and then I had two to check how dilated I was and then I had an epidural and with that you feel nothing so no need to worry. Cross that bridge when you come to it!

Good luck and keep us posted! xo

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! That really put my mind at ease! We Haven't used protection in probably about 5 years...but we are always super careful. (as careful as you can be without protection)....but that worrys me too.....5 years and nothing? I've been to the doc ...I had a normal pap but the experience there made my vaginismus 100x worse. she belittled me and didn't educate me. She really scarred me emotionally. Now, I'm doing a little better...last year I went to a doctor that really understood...she tried to do an exam and didn't want to push it because I was so nervous so she never completed it. But felt my stomach aand did the breast exam. I gave her symptoms I would have and my period schedule and she said everything seems fine just keep working at it (intercourse and treatment). How severe was your vaginismus? Feel free to send me a private message. I really appreciate your help!!!

 

[pachamama92]

Glad to be of help! Vaginismus is horrible, I had a terrible experience with a nurse who did a pap on me a few years ago and who actually made me cry in the doctors surgery. Mine has always been pretty bad but I think I've developed ways to deal with it better. I found the breathing techniques they give you for when you are in labour worked pretty well for internal exams, maybe they make you focus on something else, I don't know. I think some health professionals need a good old educating on how traumatising it can be. It's worse when they are in a rush and get impatient. Try to pick a time of day for appointments when you know they won't be too harrassed and explain to them beforehand. I was so lucky I had a great gyneocologist when my son who totally put me at ease.

Yeah we were being "careful" without using protection for years before I got pregnant, eventually when we started "trying" we were lucky and it happened within a few months so fingers crossed it's the same for you!