Toddlers and Homebirth

[future_numan]

I was just wondering women with toddlers at home.
What will you do with your toddler during labour and birth.

 

[moomin_troll]

Luckly Zane was in bed but I did have my little sister n stand by there incase he woke up n she would of stayed up their with him or took him out

 

[Mervs Mum]

Most if the families with toddlers have laboured at night and given birth in the morning. Your body knows when it's 'safe' to labour and if you're anxious labour will hold off. I supported a woman and she laboured from the early hours and was struggling to get established as she was thinking anpbout her toddler waking soon. We discussed the plan and once she woke and was taken to her carer the woman relaxed....literally as the door closed with her hubby taking her little girl she got in to established labour and within and hour of her hubby's return the baby was born.

 

[Ju_bubbs]

My LO is tucked up fast asleep in bed while my contractions have got down to 7 mins apart, hopefully this LO will get a move on and arriv before morning, but if she doesn't, I have a 'safe environment' set up in a spare room, where my older children will take her to play.. though that only works if you have trustworthy older children!

 

[Joyzerelly]

I'm not sure, some people let them linger about and watch, I think this could be really healthy for them, seeing something as normal and natural as birth happening, along with seeing their sibling being born. However, if they're the tearaway type, they could just add to your stress levels and not be nice to have around at all. Especially as birth can be long and boring. I'm also slightly worried about the birth turning out to be a bit traumatic (like my last one) and obviously I wouldn't want my little one to see mummy in distress etc. So, although I love the idea of having my quiet little angel seeing his little sister come into the world, I might get my mother to take him for the night instead.
On the other hand I think it could be very healthy for him to be there, he'd understand exactly where the baby had come from and wouldn't come home to find a new small person had moved in while he was gone, just waiting to snatch his mummy away. I think his being there and being involved in some way would be much healthier... So really? I'm not sure. That's yet to be decided. He's only 18 months, if he was older, say 3 or 4, I think I'd definitely prefer him to be there.

 

[emera35]

Assuming i labour at night, we'll leave him to sleep and call my Mum to come over (2 hours away) then if i'm still labouring in the morning, she can taking him on a day trip until we call to say to return If i start labour in the day then i'll call my friend to take him out until my Mum arrives. I'd have him around, but he'd be all over the place, and i'm a bit worried he'd get frightened with what was happening so it seems better for him to go off and have some fun then come back to a shiny new sister

 

[Tacey]

I'm keeping our options open. DH and the doula will be around, so if she's around, they may be able to keep her looked after. If I find having her around distracting or restrictive, we've got my MIL on call to take her out if necessary. We've been talking about birth, and what happens, read lots of books and have seen some birth videos, so I think she'll be prepared.

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

wasn't intended, see my birth story, however Ruby was with me for all of my very brief labour and was in the next room while i delivered! She saw Scarlett with the cord attached, a fair bit of mess etc and was just fascinated by her sister. She only got a bit concerned when the paramedics and MW turned up, but my mum took her for the rest of the day as was originally planned.

 

[future_numan]

Most if the families with toddlers have laboured at night and given birth in the morning. Your body knows when it's 'safe' to labour and if you're anxious labour will hold off. I supported a woman and she laboured from the early hours and was struggling to get established as she was thinking anpbout her toddler waking soon. We discussed the plan and once she woke and was taken to her carer the woman relaxed....literally as the door closed with her hubby taking her little girl she got in to established labour and within and hour of her hubby's return the baby was born.

Oh, I hope your right. I have a great fear of delivering this baby alone with my toddler.
My labour with Emily was a total of about 30 mins from start to delivery. We live about 20 mins from where the midwives are located and at the time of year I am due, DH will be working about 1 1/2 hrs away.
We are hoping my water breaks before the onset of labour so there would be notice.
I have no family or friends close by so I am depending on DH to care for / comfort LO.
I have started to prepare LO for the upcoming arrival of her brother but at 2yrs old I am not sure how much she understands.

wasn't intended, see my birth story, however Ruby was with me for all of my very brief labour and was in the next room while i delivered! She saw Scarlett with the cord attached, a fair bit of mess etc and was just fascinated by her sister. She only got a bit concerned when the paramedics and MW turned up, but my mum took her for the rest of the day as was originally planned.

I would love to read your birth story. Could you provide a link, please

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

one handed at the mo but it's the last post i think in the positive natural births sticky thread in here.

 

[shopgirl771]

this is something that worries me. well everything seems to worry me atm lol.
if we had a big house id love nothing more than for MIL to look after LO downstairs but were in a small maisonette so MIL is on call to come get LO at first signs. i worry tho as shes over an hour away and my last labour was very fast. i think im going to ask a local friend if she wouldnt mind stepping in in the intrim.
last time i got very tetchy during the labour about being left on my own. i wouldnt even let OH go from my side to the other side of the room so i worry about worst case scenario if he has to look after LO (hes a very energetic inquisitive kind of toddler) how ill cope on my own. having said that i was terrified last time and this time ive been hypno birthing to combat this so fingers crossed.

 

[future_numan]

I had a MW appt today and I expressed my concern about being home alone with my toddler and going into labour.
She suggested that we maybe check to see how my cervix is are week 38 or 39.
If I am dialated and effaced that maybe a option is to break my waters.
That way there is at least some time to prepare ( hubby could stay home ect.)

 

[Mervs Mum]

are you in the uk?

 

[ljo1984]

I had imogen with me right up until I was transferred. I was planning on her been there till the end, I had my mum round to meet her needs and entertain her.

 

[moomin_troll]

are you in the uk?

This was my first reaction!
With my first I had my waters broken and that was classed as induction so had to be in hospital!


I'm a single mum so I knew I'd go into labour when it was just me n Zane in the house and I did lol so I just got on the phoe to my mum to come round after being in labour 30 mins. I started contracting every 5 mins from the start, Corey was not waiting around lol

 

[ljo1984]

oops didnt read replies, i wouldnt be happy having my waters broker pre labout in the community! is there no body close by that could pop in and watch you lo while waiting for you dh to arrive?

 

[Mervs Mum]

What she's suggesting is a social induction.....it's very unusual in the uk and breaking the waters is not with out its own risks especially so early. I'd say do more research. Breaking your waters IMO doesn't partiularly help your situation.

 

[future_numan]

are you in the uk?

No, I am in Canada..

I have never heard of this either... I worry about infection and having to be hospitalised for induction if I don't go into labour myself.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Then an ARM at 38/39 weeks is probably not the best idea....

 

[freckleonear]

Most if the families with toddlers have laboured at night and given birth in the morning. Your body knows when it's 'safe' to labour and if you're anxious labour will hold off. I supported a woman and she laboured from the early hours and was struggling to get established as she was thinking anpbout her toddler waking soon. We discussed the plan and once she woke and was taken to her carer the woman relaxed....literally as the door closed with her hubby taking her little girl she got in to established labour and within and hour of her hubby's return the baby was born.

Exactly this. I went into labour in the early morning and my mum took my son for most of the day. However, in my case I was anxious about him being away/coming back at the wrong time and my labour stalled all day. As soon as he was home and safely tucked up into bed my labour progressed quickly and his sister was born while he was fast asleep upstairs. Next time I will keep them at home with me as I know I'll be happier and more relaxed that way, plus it's a great experience for them.