Too much to ask?

[missk1989]

My OH wanted to go out this afternoon to have a look for a suit then go for a drink with his friend. I asked if he would be back for tea and he said they will probably make a night of it. This means being out from about 2pm-12am. I asked why he couldnt come home for tea maybe 7ish and he said he could come home for tea and go back out but i said dont bother. Now he isnt going at all. I dont see why he can go out for a few hours. There are only two of them going and they speak every day. What could they possibly need to do for ten hours that leaves me at home all day with the baby the second day running? Am i asking too much?

 

[KayBea]

not too much to ask at all.
just let him go & then u do the same next weekend xx

 

[missk1989]

I cant, he has an open day for a medicine course he is looking at which means its me and the baby all day again! He has decided to compromise now and go out after tea but i still dont get it!

 

[Natasha2605]

I'd put my foot down. Two days in a row? That's taking the piss in my book.

 

[missk1989]

I'd put my foot down. Two days in a row? That's taking the piss in my book.

The first day he was working but he has gone out twice in a week a few weeks running recently whereas i see my friends once a month if that and i often have the baby in tow!

 

[Ceejay123]

.

 

[missk1989]

call me harsh but I'm going to play devils advocate.

If I were you I'd plan more time out with my own friends.
It sounds like you're unhappy he's out because you don't get to.

You said two days in a row; then said he was at work the first day. So I don't count that.

Everyone needs time out. Maybe ask him to go running when yor kids are in bed (I go gym when Riley's in bed) so that you're not on your own looking after them. Regarding him going out once this week with his friends I don't personally see the issue, so long as he'd also give you a break for a day. I'd also make sure when you're out with friends he has the baby, we all need time alone

I dont mind him going out in the evening or something. Thats what he did in the end. I just dont see why he has to go out at two in the afternoon and stay out all day and night. Its not time to go out i need its time to do my PGCE and planning for work. He never has lo on his own so i can get stuff done. Even in the evenings i pick lo up on my way home from work, watch him until his bathtime, do bedtime routine and then have to start tea because he has been sat chatting online. The number of times we have had the converstaion that if he made tea or tidied up a bit whilst i put the baby to bed we would both have more time to ourselves is unreal. But the truth is he doesnt really care because he will just go out when he wants to and have his free time. Its not so easy for me as i constantly feel guilty about leaving him with lo as he isnt as confident and struggles to give lo his 100% concentration all of the time and then gets stressed.
Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant. Reading it back i should probably be saying all this to him. Which i will when he gets up (just another gripe as it was my turn to have a lie in this morning but suprise suprise i am the one who got up at 5 )

 

[AP]

2pm to 12am would be a pure piss take in my book, for drinks anyway! But that's about it for me. He's entitled to his time but , if that was me, I'd be going out later than 2pm