Trying to relax

[lori]

Hi girls,

I'm doing my best to stay calm and enjoy this pregnancy, but of course that's much easier said than done when you're pre-programmed to expect disaster around every corner

Last time I found out at 12+4 that my baby had died at around 10 weeks I really thought that once I got past that 10 week mark with a heartbeat, I'd be able to relax a bit. I've been able to pick up a nice strong heartbeat every day, but I still feel so bloody anxious. I'm 11+5 today, and I feel absolutely ill thinking about the next week.

I know that nerves are part of pregnancy and being a mom, but does this crippling fear subside once you're safely past the point of previous losses? Please tell me it does. Lie to me if you have to. Ok, don't lie, but go easy on me.

I feel like I'm about to have my heart broken all over again

 

[Las78]

Hun, I remember all to clearly the few days leadig up to the time of my last loss so I totally understand where you're coming from.

Once I had got past the day I felt so much better, We'd made it, that wasn't to say that all my fears just disappeared though. I relaxed slightly though. I didn't truly feel hopeful until I got to viability, even now I'm not totally relaxed and don't think I will be until bubs is safely in my arms.

It does get easier hun x

 

[Mrs Doddy]

I know how you feel and in answer to your question I found that since my scan and now I am passed the time where I lost my last baby it is a bit easier and am tring to enjoy the pregnancy now. A friend said to me last night that she regrets spending her whole pregnancy worrying. I am of no illiusion tho that everything is going to be ok now because I have passed that milestone and do still worry but it's alot better now

 

[lori]

Thanks for your replies I'm feeling a bit more positive today, but it's still rough.

Everyday has some significance. Like today I'm 11+6. Last time I had my first appointment at 11+6. I had a terrible feeling for weeks beforehand, and then the doctor couldnt find the heartbeat. I remember the pain and worry, and I feel almost guilty feeling good today because I can find the heartbeat easily. You'd think that would be reassuring, but it just brings it all back.

But you're right, I don't want to look back and have regrets about spending the whole pregnancy worrying. I just cant figure out how to stop

Thanks again, I'm wishing you and your babies all the best