TTC 22 DPO BFN but I MUST be pregnant! Any help or advice?

[KSeifried07]

I will start this post off by saying hello! I am new here to babyandbump and was hoping for a better and more helpful experience than I had on the forums at BabyCenter. I'm certain I've done about as much research as any one woman can but I'm sure just getting it out there and telling someone will help the anxiety I've been dealing with. I will also apologize ahead of time about how long this post may be because I tend to jabber.
I am 23 years old and my husband and I are TTC our first pregnancy.
I was on the Depo Provera shot as my form of birth control for many years (too many and it was a terrible idea. I do not recommend depo as a long term birth control method. It caused me a lot of issues and stress). After a year of struggling to get my cycle back I finally checked out normal and perfectly healthy by my OBGYN. I finally got my regular period back after being off of depo for a full year and 1 month.

My last period was on February 4th and it was very light and short (about 3 days). I calculated everything on a calendar (I am unsure how long my cycle actually is but I calculated as 28 days because they were usually pretty regular before depo) and I ovulated on February 18th, right on schedule. I had light brown discharge and very light pink when I whipped once and then no more. My husband and I had unprotected sex all through my ovulation period (Feb. 13 - 21) at least once to twice a day. I got too eager and purchased a Clearblue Advanced HPT and tested on Feb. 28th. This was far too early, I know, and it was of course BFN.
On March 3rd (the day before my period was due) I felt slight cramps in my lower tummy that were extremely similar to period cramps but no where near as painful or consistent. I felt these slight cramps a little bit at a time for about 2 days but they got less and less noticeable as time went on. My period never came and I am now 8 days late.

I am now 22 DPO and still nothing but BFN. But I have pretty much every pregnancy symptom in the book.

Moodiness/feeling wheepy
Bloating and slight tummy aches
Achne
Butterfingers
Very slight puffiness in the face
Achy muscles and fatigue
Change in appetite
Slight back pains
Sore breasts
More noticeable veins in my wrists, hands, and breasts
(sorry if TMI on these next ones)
Darkening and sensitive nipples
(Nipples feel almost swollen and look bigger??)
A white thick discharge almost like egg whites. It isn't really runny or liquid its more gooey and thick. No funny smell or color just white and odorless. It mostly happens when my husband and I have intercourse but sometimes just during my regular day.
When my husband and I have sex it feels different. As if I am way tighter than before, almost like I am swollen? It doesn't hurt or get irritating just feels "different". My husband notices it too.

I just FEEL pregnant. Like I am almost sure of it but I just absolutely can not get a positive HPT. I have tried Clearblue, EPT, First Response, and the cheap 88 cent ones. All BFN. I have no tested since about 3 days ago but I am terrified because the more negatives I get the more I lose hope and become depressed. I am just ready to be out of this limbo and to have a test confirm what I feel I already know.

Have any of you ever had this experience or know someone who couldn't get a BFP but were indeed pregnant? What else could be going on if I am not pregnant? Because at this point it seems almost impossible that I am not. I can't see anything else being the problem. Please share any information or helpful advice or stories with me. And again I apologize for the ridiculously long post. I thank anyone who took the time to read it and even if I don't get any replies I'm glad I could get it off my chest.

 

[KatO79]

I have tried being 5 days late but still wasn't pregnant and my period came. I've seen paople be 10 or more days late without being pregnant. There are other reasons for your period to be late than pregnancy:

https://www.mypregnancybaby.com/reasons-missed-period/

I'd advise you to get your GP to take a blood test. If that also is negative, then it's highly unlikely you're pregnant. I've only once heard of a case with a woman who was pregnant but couldn't test positive on either HPTs or blood tests. But I think that those cases are extremely rare.

So yeah, get your GP to take a blood test.

 

[KSeifried07]

My doctor told me it's possible for 9 out of 15 women to have lower hcg and a lot of women not get a positive hpt until they are 6 weeks pregnant without a blood test. And it's more than just my period being late. :/
I know it's possible to miss a period due to other reasons but I'm also having extremely noticeable pregnancy symptoms beyond just a missed period. But maybe you're right. :/ maybe I'm not pregnant. Guess I'll just wait until Wednesday and see what the doctor says I should do..

 

[KatO79]

I'd be careful with the symptom spotting because it can fool you. I've had months where I felt like I was experiencing pregnancy symptoms only to have my period show up. There are lots of PMS symptoms that mimic pregnancy.

I'd just relax and not think about it so much and try a blood test when your GP recomends you to. Because I've read about it being possible to talk yourself into being pregnant when you're not. Not saying that's the case, just good to know.

So yeah ask your GP when he thinks you should try taking a blood test and take it from there. In the meantime (to be on the safe side) avoid drinking alcohol and if you're not already doing so, take a prenatal with folic acid to prevent birth defects. It's actually recommended to take prenatals before you conceive, preferably 3 months before you start trying.

 

[KatieMK]

Hey, KS!:wave:

How do you know that you ovulated? Are you temping? Are you using OPKs? Because another explanation for your situation could be that your two days of cramping were O cramps, and you're actually not as many DPO as you initially thought. If you're tracking your O somehow, that wouldn't be the case, but I didn't see any mention of it in what you wrote.

I'm not familiar with D.P., nor have I read much about the experience of other ladies coming off it, but I know that it can take a body a long time to regulate post birth control. If you have just gotten your period back at all, it could be that your body hasn't settled on a cycle length yet, so you'd have fluctuations in your O date. I wouldn't depend on how long your cycles were pre-D.P. since things can change as time goes by and it sounds like that was a long time ago! For example, my cycles were 23-25 days pre-BCP, and now they're 31 days. I started using OPKs this month to pinpoint ovulation, and it turns out I O later in my cycle than the standard math would otherwise lead me to believe. It could be your situation is similar, and you were intense with your BDing efforts too early.

Fx for you!

 

[KSeifried07]

Update for everyone! (And Thank you to those taking time to reply)..

I know I ovulated due to a change in my temp and having brown and light pink discharge/spotting on the day of my expected ovulation. and my husband and I have sex pretty much every day at least once. Even when I'm not ovulating or for ttc reasons.

Hubby pointed out that within the last few days he has noticed a difference when we have sex. He says I feel much tighter, almost like a "swollen" feeling. And I am a little puffy down there but no irritation. my nipples are also feeling more and more sensitive than before. When I get in the shower it is almost painful when water runs over them and it is extremely irritating to wear a bra. And still no signs of AF. I haven't tested since Monday and I am trying to just hold out until closer to my Dr appointment.

Idk. A lot of people have been trying to tell me I'm not pregnant and to immediately think there is something else going on. But something in my gut tells me otherwise. I may have my hopes top high and be tricking myself but there are some changes going on with my body that just can't be imagined. My sister in law husband and best friend, the 3 people I am closest to, all say they notice a difference about me and a gut feeling that I am pregnant. My sister in law is 20 weeks pregnant herself right now and she says she is certain I am pregnant. she says she "can feel it and see it". My best friend says I have an "aura" about me. Idk. As far as I'm concerned it's not over until the fat lady (AF) sings. That's why I was asking if there are any women out there that have shared a similar experience like the one I am having and turned out to be pregnant. From what I'be seen and researched and from what my doctor told me, late BFPs are actually more common than people think. I have seen where some women couldn't get a BFP on a HPT until they were 6 weeks pregnant or more. I'd like to think that I am not an exception to this and that it is possible for me as well. I guess it would just help to discuss and share experiences with women with similar issues or similar questions. I figured it might help keep me from stressing too much until I can find something out next week with my doctor.

 

[KSeifried07]

It actually makes a lot of sense that I may have ovulated later than expected. I tried to keep track of everything but it's possible I calculated wrong. I just feel pregnant you know?? and all the bfns are so discouraging. The waiting game is the most frustrating part right now.

 

[KSeifried07]

And please excuse all the typeos! just got a new phone and I am still getting used to the keyboard lol

 

[KatieMK]

It actually makes a lot of sense that I may have ovulated later than expected. I tried to keep track of everything but it's possible I calculated wrong. I just feel pregnant you know?? and all the bfns are so discouraging. The waiting game is the most frustrating part right now.

Oh trust us! We know how awful it feels to see only one line!

If you think at all you might have ovulated later, count the days since the later cramping you felt and see how many DPO you'd be now. Then test! And fx crossed for your appointment next week!! So exciting!

 

[KSeifried07]

I have been noticing more changes in my body. The last couple of days I have taken on an extreme restlessness. I cannot sleep for anything. A very little bit of weight gain (I am a healthy clean eater who exercises regularly and goes to yoga once a week. I have had a pretty steady and healthy weight since being off of depo shot..so no reason for any weight gain.) sensitive gums. And a little bit of bleeding when I brush my teeth. I have always had healthy teeth. Haven't had a cavity since I was 7 and have never had bleeding gums or sensitive teeth. The veins in my breast are so noticeable it is almost as if my skin is transparent. My nipples are darkened to the point they are almost brown when they were originally a light pink. Still no sign of AF. Very bloated and gassy. Still getting small tummy aches. And I have been experiencing a lot of nausea and frequent urination. I am also noticing new freckles and light blemishes. on my skin and my skin is extremely oily. The acne is undeniable. I also have been having issues with my armpit hair growing faster than usual. I have to shave much more frequently. What used to be an every 3 day thing has now become an every day thing. Not to mention my husband is also pretty hormonal and moody himself. Him and I have been together since 7th grade and he has always been sort of a hormone sponge for me. He has always felt sympathy pains and been able to read my body just as well as I have. He has always predicted my period shared my cramps and mood swings and gotten hormonal when I get hormonal. At this point I do not think I can deny pregnancy any longer. I still haven't tested again though, just in case. I plan to hold out for just a few more days. And I am still holding on to my dr appointment for Wednesday. Fingers crossed!!!!!

 

[bunyhuny]

I hope you got a positive response! GL!


Just a note (and not to be a party pooper, but it's important info):

BD'ing multiple times a day for many days on end will decrease a man's sperm count so that after a week he can have the count of an infertile man. It can also cause a decline in sperm production, the effects of which can last for months. Just something to watch out for.


For those who want details:

Most doctors recommend BD'ing every other day for best success rate. When BD'ing every other day, researchers see the highest possible conception results for both 100% healthy men AND for men who have minimal sperm issues. BD'ing every day, on the other hand, produces top conception rates in SOME 100% healthy guys, but less that top rates in other guys who are 100% fertile. Guys who are not at peak fertility almost always see a decline in conception rates when BD'ing every day. Since you don't know which group your husband falls into, it's best to have sex every other day through your cycle. BD'ing every other day will never decrease your chance of success, and will often increase it. Once you have gotten a positive ovulation test, you *might* choose to BD every day for three days running, since you know you should be ovulating within those 72 hours, and that's how long sperm live.

Multiple daily ejaculations, however, do not help in any way. If you start multiple daily ejaculations beginning with positive OPK and ending three days later, you conception rates will not be any higher than if you had been BD'ing every other day all cycle, or every day starting at positive OPK. What's worse is that over a few days, multiple daily ejaculations will ALWAYS decrease sperm production and most definitely can hinder your conception rate. That means if you are BD'ing that frequently the entire week before O, by the time you actually O, there is a very high chance that your husband will be shooting blanks, no matter how healthy he is. The sperm simply cannot be produced fast enough, and the seminal fluid cannot be at an adequate volume either. Under no circumstance does multiple times a day actually benefit conception.

Lastly, ejaculating multiple time daily can actually lower a man's count for months after such frequent ejaculation is ceased if he carries out this behavior for a longer duration. In monkey's they have seen decreases in sperm count for a full 6 months AFTER multiple daily ejaculation is ceased. Researchers are still uncertain why this occurs, but they have proven that it does.

The absolute best success rates for conception can be seen when couples BD once every two days leading up to positive OPK and then every day for 3-4 days, starting with the day of the positive OPK.

 

[Helena88]

I'm kind of in the same situation. Currently 18DPO and had negative tests on 11DPO, 16DPO & 17DPO. I don't have nearly as many symptoms as you though. I'm 99.9% sure I ovulated when I did due to cervical mucus, cervix position, ovulation pain & rise in temps. My temps are still high and it doesn't feel like AF will be arriving any time soon (I wish she would arrive just to put me out of my misery lol). I have my fingers crossed that you get a BFP!

 

[KSeifried07]

Hey everyone!! Just an update! I went to the doctor on Wednesday and they gave me both a urine and a blood test. The urine test came back negative but also showed that I have a UTI!! I was shocked because I have had MANY UTI's in my life time (my mother gets them really often too and so did my grandmother) and I was showing NO SYMPTOMS of a UTI what so ever. It does not burn when I pee, and the only frequent urination I've had has been no where near as often as I usually pee with a UTI. But they said I had a "raging" UTI, to use their exact words. But no symptom of it what so ever. Even my nurse said something wasn't adding up right, and to keep behaving as though I am pregnant (as far as taking care of myself goes No smoking, no drinking, so on..) and they will call with my blood test results on Monday. They said if the blood test result comes out negative, they are setting another appointment for me to come in so we can figure out where to go from here (ultrasound to be extra sure and discussing putting me on fertility meds if I am in fact not pregnant).. So, we still aren't sure. But it's not over just yet!!!

And thank you bunny for that information! I actually already knew that in the way back of my mind but have been so caught up in trying to get pregnant that I completely forgot that all of that actually happens! I am so glad you reminded me! I have to keep that in mind for next cycle if I am not pregnant now.

Helena88 I have my fingers crossed for you, too!! Hopefully we will both get our BFPs soon! I know how it feels to want to just hurry up and have SOMETHING, ANYTHING happen even if it is AF just to get out of limbo! It can get so stressful and each and every BFN just makes me cry and lose hope. So baby dust for both of us!!!

I still have no signs of AF. My breasts are still tender but not AS sore as they have been. My husband pointed out that they feel "knotted" up. There is a bit of a swelling or a knot feeling in the center of both breasts, behind the nipple. It still hurts to wear a bra or move around too much. I still feel fluttery and strange feelings in my lower tummy. Not cramping, but more like a "pulling" feeling. Acne is starting to become a serious annoyance!! Mostly on my shoulders! And my freckles are OUT OF CONTROL! (I am a ginger so I am naturally pretty freckly but I am noticing that I have NEW freckles and my freckles are just more intense in general.. 'Spreading', if you will)

I don't know. Strange things, ladies. Strange things. lol. I guess we will see!!

 

[bunyhuny]

That is crazy you could have a bad UTI and not know it! So weird!! I hope it gets cleared up soon. I wonder if it can affect your cycles to have a UTI going on?

 

[KSeifried07]

According to my doctor, having a UTI can effect my cycle and possibly made me ovulate later than I thought. And I could be pregnant but no where near as far along as I think because I ovulated later than I thought because of the uti. He thought it was strange too that I felt no symptoms of the uti considering how bad it is. I've never had a uti and not known. Crazy stuff. So I guess I just have to sit and wait until Monday for my news. I've been so tempted to take another hpt but I'm fighting the urge. hopefully I can get my junk in order soon! :/

 

[bunyhuny]

I hope the weekend doesn't drag on too badly for you. Darn those doctors not having a faster turn around time on blood work! Let me know how it goes. Sending good thoughts your way.

 

[aprilwonders]

According to my doctor, having a UTI can effect my cycle and possibly made me ovulate later than I thought. And I could be pregnant but no where near as far along as I think because I ovulated later than I thought because of the uti. He thought it was strange too that I felt no symptoms of the uti considering how bad it is. I've never had a uti and not known. Crazy stuff. So I guess I just have to sit and wait until Monday for my news. I've been so tempted to take another hpt but I'm fighting the urge. hopefully I can get my junk in order soon! :/

I'm so glad I found this because the exact same thing happened to me last month. I am prone to UTIs so I feel like I'd know the symptoms if I had one. I had loads of 'pregnancy symptoms' - nausea, hot flashes, dark erect nipples (unusual for me), headaches, acne, metallic taste, etc... I had bleeding when my period was due but it was light and only lasted 36 hours... The doctor detected white blood cells in my urine and told me that I had a water infection so I've been taking antibiotics but I'm still nauseous with headaches?!

I'd love to hear an update - this ttc stuff is really stressing me out!

 

[Lil.Liz]

Same thing happened to me I was 8 days late, bfn and had symptoms like crazy. I started drinking a lot of water and finally got my period.

Wish u good luck !! Hope u get good news

 

[KSeifried07]

For anyone who is still around I have an update! And another question! So sadly I am not pregnant. I turned out to have a really really bad uti/bladder infection. BOO! But luckily the antibiotics helped. My period was really late due to the uti but as soon as those antibiotics got in my system BOOM. Biggest period EVER! LOL! so now I am getting ready to ovulate and try again. My ovulation starts in two days. but I still have a couple more days of antibiotics. Dr prescribed ciprofloxacin. He said I should be fine still ttc as long as I am not taking the antibiotics while actually pregnant. But taking them while ovulating shouldn't hurt my chances of getting pregnant. I've seen other women on here say this as well. Anyone had any experience ttc while on this medication??

 

[KSeifried07]

According to my doctor, having a UTI can effect my cycle and possibly made me ovulate later than I thought. And I could be pregnant but no where near as far along as I think because I ovulated later than I thought because of the uti. He thought it was strange too that I felt no symptoms of the uti considering how bad it is. I've never had a uti and not known. Crazy stuff. So I guess I just have to sit and wait until Monday for my news. I've been so tempted to take another hpt but I'm fighting the urge. hopefully I can get my junk in order soon! :/[/QUOTE

I'm so glad I found this because the exact same thing happened to me last month. I am prone to UTIs so I feel like I'd know the symptoms if I had one. I had loads of 'pregnancy symptoms' - nausea, hot flashes, dark erect nipples (unusual for me), headaches, acne, metallic taste, etc... I had bleeding when my period was due but it was light and only lasted 36 hours... The doctor detected white blood cells in my urine and told me that I had a water infection so I've been taking antibiotics but I'm still nauseous with headaches?!

I'd love to hear an update - this ttc stuff is really stressing me out!

What I discovered was the really bad uti (I'm prone to them too, especially since getting with my hudband and him and I have intercourse so often) was preventing my period from starting regularly and really messed with my cycle. All the symptoms I was getting were actually period symptoms that are in common with pregnancy symptoms and my hormones were so out of wack that it was making everything much more severe. As soon as my period started it all faded away. Taking antibiotics started my period and I had a proper and pretty heavy period for 5 days. Hoping to be more successful in the baby makings this time around.