*Very recent loss at 20wks...*

[TandJ]

My heart is still broken as I lost my baby girl on February 13th 2013. She was born at 20 weeks. She weighed 15 ounces and was almost 9 inches long. She was diagnosed a few weeks ago with a very large Cystic Hygroma and Fetal Hydrops, her body was so swollen her heart could not handle the swelling. They believe she had Turners Syndrome and we will find out in a few days on what made her so sick. I went into labor naturally and delivered her sleeping my heart aches for her. We held her for about 12 hours. We took lots of pictures and promised her we would try again for another baby. The doctors suggested waiting 3 months. Ive known women that became pregnant 2-3 months after delivering a baby and per research I've read that women are the most fertile after delivering a baby. Not sure if this is true or not. Has anyone had any success right after? And anyone around the same gestation I was? Thanks ladies also if anyone would like to see pictures of my sweet angel Isabelle they are in my 'Pregnancy Journal' (see link in my signature) her skin is red due to how early she is and she has a small bruise on her forehead. In one of the pics you can see part of the Hygroma and you can see by her hands how swollen she was, but she was still so very beautiful to us. We miss her so much!

 

[gnomette]

Hi I am sorry for the loss of your daughter xx I lost my son at 20wks last may xx we didn't start trying until September I was induced an had a few complications after so I couldnt start again strait away but I found giving my self some time helped x but my mw did day as soon as everything was sorted we could start trying but it all depends on you an when you feel like ttc take each day at a time when you feel ready you will know x there is no right or wrong way x

 

[MrsB1981]

I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our little boy, Arthur, at 22+3 in June last year. You will be going through such a dark time, and whilst I can say the grief never leaves you for your beautiful little girl it will get easier in the months to come.

My only advice is, and I completely understand the overwhelming desire to be pregnant again, don't rush. You need to grieve for what you have lost and let your body have time to recover. I waited for my period (4 weeks) then we tried and fell pregnant straight away - I sadly then miscarried at 8 weeks. I think my body just wasn't ready. I've since taken 3 months out ttc, had acupunture and lots of counselling. I feel much more positive and was ready to start ttc again, although it is very scary.

For now, focus on creating lasting memories of your precious little girl. I have a beautiful rose I am growing for Arthur and his photo by my bedside. I think of him every day but I cry much less now. I am also able to remember what an honour it was to be his Mummy. I am glad you had the chance to kiss and cuddle your daughter goodbye. I will treasure kissing Arthur goodbye for the rest of my life xxxx

 

[MrsB1981]

I took a look at your journal, Isabelle is a beautiful name and she looks so peaceful in your pictures. I'm crying knowing the pain you are going now but please know that she has blessed your lives in ways that it is hard to understand at the moment, treasure your photos and memories of her xxx

 

[MandaAnda]

I wasn't as far along as you. I had my 12 week scan, and there was a large nuchal fold, fluid in her tummy and chest, and she had a bright bowel. I was told it could be due to an infection (that later came back clear) or a chromosomal abnormality. I was given the option for CVS but decided to adopt a wait and see approach to give her the chance we could before making further decisions. Come the repeat scan nine days later, I knew she'd gone. I'd felt a disconnect. There was no heartbeat, and I was given the pill to switch off the hormones. I was induced two days later, as I wanted to see her, wanted a post mortem and couldn't bear the thought of an ERPC. It was a proper labour with stages and all, which I'm strangely glad for.

I'd re-familiarised myself with chromosomal issues during those nine days (I'm a children's nurse and used to work in SCBU/NICU). I felt sure it was Turner syndrome or at least a chromosomal abnormality. Maybe I was hoping for Turner, as it's just as unlikely that it'd happen a second time as it ever was. It was Turner. We found out about six weeks after I lost her (hubby was deployed throughout the pregnancy, and I delayed the results and burial until he was home). The obstetrician said its fine to try again ASAP, and we have been. I just feel like I need to be pregnant, like my body needs it. BFN last month, although everything was timed perfectly. We SMEP'd this month, and I'm 4DPO now. Sorry for the long story. Best of luck!

 

[Topanga053]

TandJ, I don't have any advice as I had an earlier loss, but I just wanted to say that I am so, so sorry for your loss. It's obvious just from your post that you and your partner are wonderful parents to your angel and will be wonderful parents to a rainbow baby, hopefully someday soon.

All three of your will be in my prayers during this difficult time.

 

[TandJ]

Thank you all for the kind words. It means so much to me. We miss her so much and are looking forward to trying again soon. We just went out and bought vitamins and will be getting ourselves very healthy for the next baby. We are hopeful and believe Isabelle will help pick out an amazing brother or sister for us to have

 

[Hopefulagain]

I am so very sorry for your loss of Isabella. I now how blindsighted and devastated you feel. My husband and I just recently lost our little girl, Zoi, at 21 weeks on December 13, 2012. It is now believed to have been caused by an incompetent cervix that resulted in an infection. We too are heartbroken, but very much would like to have another baby. We were given the okay by my doctor to try again, but I am still bleeding. I have only had about 3 weeks, off and on, of no bleeding at all since I delivered. I know someone who lost her daughter at 27 weeks about 4 months ago and is now 10 weeks pregnant. So I guess it all depends on the person. I am still spotting and still don't know if I have actually had a period yet since I never really ever stopped bleeding. It may take some time for your body to get back on track like mine or it may happen pretty quickly for you like the other lady that I know. Best wishes to you and your family...may your heart begin to heal.

 

[Maxparedesmom]

Im sorry for ur loss . i lost my max 12/20/12 at 19 weeks 5 days . I started tring right away and hoping Tom my pregnancy test will be positive .. Crossing my fingers.. I wish u all the best In this horrible time . Take as much time as u feel u need ..

 

[TandJ]

Thank you ladies, sorry for your loss' s as well. It is such a hard thing to go through. I pray we will all fall pregnant soon xx who knows maybe we all will conceive around the same time and have some rainbow babies

 

[SusieC]

I am so sorry for your loss that is so sad and heartbreaking for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers